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Too soon, too soon…

Tombat’s ability to uncannily dredge up natural disasters and acts of terrorism just as they’re happening in real life is in full force in today’s strip! With the official US death toll of Hurricane Sandy rapidly approaching 100, today’s little romp seems poorly timed. Most casual readers don’t know Batiuk writes these strips a year in advance; the whole thing just comes across as rather tasteless instead of the usual unfunny.

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*Bzzzt* "It's me, Cory. We're still backing out of the driveway…"

Private Winkerbean! Other than maybe Private Dancer or Private Parts it’d be harder to think of a worse last name to have if you’re about to go to boot camp. Ma and Pa Pizza are somehow able to muster up some half hearted musings as their son goes off to start a life in the military.

Given Wally’s track record in the military I’d be a little nervous too, Funky. Hopefully he isn’t aiming to beat Wally’s decade long POW record.

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They're heeeeere…

Well well! Another opportunity to catch up with Westview’s own Dennis the Menace, Cory Winkerbean. Following in the footsteps of his uncle-cousin Wally, Cory appears to be headed off to start a life in the military.

Military snarkers– first off, I salute you. Secondly, is this how it all goes down? The mood is pretty grim; like they’re about to send him to a firing squad. Is this how it goes down? I was always under the impression recruits went to a bus station or flew to wherever their basic training was.

Note to Backache– this is not the best time to draw Cory as a 12-year old kid again.

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You've Got Mail(man)

If today’s snark doesn’t seem nearly as amusing as usual that’s ’cause it’s your Guest host DavidO taking the reins from TFHackett to give him a much needed break.

The not-quite-PC named postal worker Crazy Harry is up for closer examination in today’s chucklefest! Today’s Sunday strip at least has something of a punchline. Clearly the stress of dealing with the post office is about to send him “postal.” The job must be stressful indeed, because despite having graduated with Funky and Co, he looks at least ten years older than them.

In the last panel, Donna appears to be contemplating smothering her ol’ man with a pillow, as seen in the Lifetime Original Movie: My Husband Won’t Stop Sleeptalking.”

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Speaking of Slips…

Sorry about the glitch with yesterday’s post. Just returned from a mini vacation to Atlantic City and had no access to internets. Just going to throw up a link to today’s thrilling installment (I’ve taken the liberty of rotating the image so you don’t have to turn your computer sideways to view it) and will let you all have at it! Apologies again, and have a nice day.

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Movin' on Up

*Sung to the tune of Jabob’s Ladder,” huh? The one by Huey Lewis and the News (and written by Bruce Hornsby)? The one by Rush? Chumbawamba? How about Dreadlock Pussy? Oh…the old spiritual. Thanks for clearing that up. The “by and by, Lord” had me thinking they were singing to the tune of “Will the Circle Be Unbroken?”

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The Great White Dope

Les and Summer arrive in Africa for their climb of Kilimanjaro, and if Les keeps this “I presume” shit up, by the time this trip’s over Summer’s eyes will have permanently rolled back in her head. Their driver immediately pegs Les for the douchebag that he is, and declines to shake his hand. That “establishing shot” of Kilimanjaro International Airport looks suspiciously like one of the first images that Google Image Search turns up. And speaking of Google, “African massage” does check out as a phrase people use to describe traveling on the region’s bumpy roads. Just don’t look up that same phrase on urbandictionary.com.

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A Car with No Name

Nice car, Funky…”
“…Did you get a good deal on the lease?”
“…How’s the gas mileage?”
“…Have you given it a name yet? Yes, friends, only in the Funkiverse would that third question be the one that gets asked of a new car owner (ok, lessee).  Indeed, Funky has given some thought to this matter: turns out that to unwisely choose your car’s name will invite a “beat-down”. From whom? The Happiness Police?

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Asshat

Being a self-aware prick does not make one any less of a prick. And it’s Dr. Livingstone, not Livingston. Prick.

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Kili-Krankshaft Krossover

Has Coach Bull already abandoned the “project” of whipping Les’ sorry ass into shape? He’s nowhere to be seen today. No matter: here comes motivation in the form of none other than Ed Crankshaft! Yes, it can be no one else; just peep this Crankshaft comic from July 2009:

The above strip is from that weird flash-forward arc where Crankshaft becomes unstuck in time, leaping Billy Pilgrim-like between scenes of his present-day, younger and older selves. This appearance lends support to the theory that Crankshaft, while also set in Ohio, takes place ten years in the past.*

Note to Cayla: if the prospect of being left to plan your wedding on your own, while your fiance goes off with his daughter to climb Kilimanjaro, doesn’t convince you that you’re making a huge mistake, well, you’re on your own.

*…while the Crankshaft strip from September 11, 2011 disproves this theory.

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