“*Sung to the tune of Jabob’s Ladder,” huh? The one by Huey Lewis and the News (and written by Bruce Hornsby)? The one by Rush? Chumbawamba? How about Dreadlock Pussy? Oh…the old spiritual. Thanks for clearing that up. The “by and by, Lord” had me thinking they were singing to the tune of “Will the Circle Be Unbroken?”
Tag: Uncategorized
The Great White Dope
Les and Summer arrive in Africa for their climb of Kilimanjaro, and if Les keeps this “I presume” shit up, by the time this trip’s over Summer’s eyes will have permanently rolled back in her head. Their driver immediately pegs Les for the douchebag that he is, and declines to shake his hand. That “establishing shot” of Kilimanjaro International Airport looks suspiciously like one of the first images that Google Image Search turns up. And speaking of Google, “African massage” does check out as a phrase people use to describe traveling on the region’s bumpy roads. Just don’t look up that same phrase on urbandictionary.com.
A Car with No Name
“Nice car, Funky…”
“…Did you get a good deal on the lease?”
“…How’s the gas mileage?”
“…Have you given it a name yet?“ Yes, friends, only in the Funkiverse would that third question be the one that gets asked of a new car owner (ok, lessee). Indeed, Funky has given some thought to this matter: turns out that to unwisely choose your car’s name will invite a “beat-down”. From whom? The Happiness Police?
Asshat
Being a self-aware prick does not make one any less of a prick. And it’s Dr. Livingstone, not Livingston. Prick.
Kili-Krankshaft Krossover
Has Coach Bull already abandoned the “project” of whipping Les’ sorry ass into shape? He’s nowhere to be seen today. No matter: here comes motivation in the form of none other than Ed Crankshaft! Yes, it can be no one else; just peep this Crankshaft comic from July 2009:
The above strip is from that weird flash-forward arc where Crankshaft becomes unstuck in time, leaping Billy Pilgrim-like between scenes of his present-day, younger and older selves. This appearance lends support to the theory that Crankshaft, while also set in Ohio, takes place ten years in the past.*
Note to Cayla: if the prospect of being left to plan your wedding on your own, while your fiance goes off with his daughter to climb Kilimanjaro, doesn’t convince you that you’re making a huge mistake, well, you’re on your own.
*…while the Crankshaft strip from September 11, 2011 disproves this theory.
Son of Stuck Funky 