Wally Jr. – Son of Stuck Funky

WallyWorld Sprint Tour

When we last saw Wally Winkerbean in this retrospective, he was staring with longing grief and acceptance into the eyes of his ex wife Becky, after having a major meltdown flashback at the Girl’s Basketball Conference Championships.

Funky lets Becky know that, as the main character, he’s taking it upon himself to facilitate Wally’s recovery.

*Sure, does Wally Jr. have any recently doodled spaceship designs he’d like?*

I waited in line for six hours to see Revenge of the Sith…and I promise you, this is NOT a quote from Yoda from that movie. At best it’s a paraphrase from lines in Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones.

Unexploded Ordinance

This post. This whole arc. Wally’s return. It’s been a struggle for me to attack. For a very long time I couldn’t really figure out why. On paper, there’s a lot to work with. Maybe too much, maybe that was part of the problem.

At first I wondered if it was because I was, once again, taking this marathon half-year of a deep dive away from John Howard. Should I save some of this stuff for a potential Wally retrospective in the future? But with the literally hundreds of stupid minutiae that the Funkyverse waves around in my face, begging me to snark and dissect, would I ever get back around to it? After all, I’ve got green pitchers and Jinx Bushka waiting for me! This is a John dive, yeah. But you can’t talk about DSH without talking about Lefty, and you can’t talk about Lefty without talking about Wally. And you can’t talk about Wally without talking about…this.

*Hey, Wally, did you know that Becky is married now? I wonder how you’ll react when you learn that! Boy I can’t wait to see that gut wrenching moment.*

Wally Earns His Second Nickel.

On July 12, 2009, the front door to the Howard home opened… and Wally Winkerbean came back.

Collecting My Thoughts

We have travelled back in time and entered the Age of the Skunk. Hideous visions await us.

*Many ‘thanks’ to Beckoning Chasm for this DSH John art. I needed a new sleep paralysis demon.*

Back to the Future

Many apologies for the lateness of this post. I meant for it to go up hours ago, but then I spent half of yesterday with my head stuck inside the charred black interior of a Lang Platinum Electric Convection Oven, and the industrial strength degreaser fumes ended up getting to me.

Now, before you get concerned, I did this in the interest of job security. They can’t fire you from the gas station if you’re the only one who knows how to clean the oven. But if anything would make one contemplate sticking their head in an oven recreationally, it would be the hideous abomination we’re about to be faced with.