Park Bench to Penthouse

“That’s right, Mr. Les: Woody Allen! And Elia Kazan, Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott effin’ Fitzgerald…Billy Wilder, too! Who do ya think gave him that line ‘All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up’? Apple Annie Apple, tha’s who.” Les: she was suffering from schizophrenia, detached from the real world. Crazy as a rat in a coffee can. The closest thing to a writer that she “made the acquaintance of” was you, you gullible bastard.

And not for nothing, according to this strip from last May, I thought it was superstar Cynthia Summers who rescued Annie from life on the streets?

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  1. David O

    So, was it Chris Crankshaft, Cynthia Summers or Woody Allen that got her the medication she needed!?

    This claptrap from the guy that said: “It’s called writing!?

    Backache expects us to remember characters he hasn’t trotted out in 15 years but expects us to overlook things like Coz-Uncle Funky and Medicationgate.

  2. Sgt Saunders

    Les, you dumb sumbitch, look at panel 1. Apple’s excuse is that she is mad as a March hare, but Les … dammit. This is the craziest shit yet. Apple thinks someone from another comic strip got her on her feet with Medication, while Cindy the News Dame claims to have done it. P1 has Apple eyeing Les’ manuscript lustfully, while Les plays the Rube, and now apparently remembers none of it. Now bring in the idiot communications methods – Les wanders in off the street to check on Apple in her near-barren office and she now claims Kent State Press wants “Lisa’s Story, ” while she fondles “Fallen Star”.
    How long can this shit go on? What is a logical outcome in a world devoid of logic or even common sense?
    Actually, we’ve probably seen the end of Apple Ann Apple for a while. Sunday will probably bring some sentimental bullshit with Les talking to himself on that bench n Central Park. Monday will find that goddam mailman drinking coffee at Montoni’s engaged in some inane jabber-rap with Kahn. So it goes.

  3. David O

    Is it just me, or is Les, who is supposed to be an English teacher, not understanding two damn cents about getting published!?

    It’s 2010. Your local Starbucks barista probably has a book on Amazon available for $14.99 paperback, $4.99 eBook. It’s so damned easy to get published these days that pretty much anyone can have a book. (I’m looking at you, Socks the Cat)

    Sorry, but Meet My Dead Wife Who Died of Cancer and Now She’s Dead would sell maybe 30 copies in the real world, most of them to the people trapped in Westview that Les guilted into buying copies.

  4. Annie is “coo coo for cocoa-puffs”

  5. Look in p1. There is a monkey in the tree.

  6. On a lower floor they discover a piano-playing millionaire who is looking for a talented act. He promises them a significant amount of money if they are good. Their act is a success with the millionaire, and it looks like everything will end happily…until the devastating revelation at the end.

    The millionaire has just promised to double their salaries when he says, “The way I throw my money around, I bet you think I’m crazy!” As if on cue, two men in white coats come to take him back to an asylum. He wants to go “by train,” and one of them gives him a toy locomotive; as they escort him away he says, “Choo choo choo…” Moe moans, “He’s as nutty as a nest of cuckoos!”
    *************************************
    I’m betting the same fate holds for Les, afterall he is nothing more then a modern Stooge.
    (from: “Rythem & Weep”)

  7. Sgt. Saunders

    The Aristocrats!