Funky Say Relax

So stressed is Harry over planning the Surprise Anniversary Party that he’s dramatically clutching his chest as he leaves Montoni’s. Kind of a shame that he and Harriet have no children who might take it upon themselves to arrange a celebration that they both could enjoy…what’s that you say? They have a daughter? You must mean Halle Dinkle! She’s the star of her own comic strip, created by TB for the National Association for Music Education website. A music educator like her celebrated Dad, no doubt Halle’s too busy enjoying having her summer off to plan her parents’ party.

Cake Boss

As stated earlier, I couldn’t get an advance peek at today’s “comic”, and as I write this, there are already thirteen excellent comments (including, of all things, a positive one!) that pretty much cover any point I could’ve made on this pointless installment. I’ll just remind the readers that last week, when Les met Funky at Montoni’s to go jogging, that I suggested that Funky had been kicked out of the house and was living at the pizzeria. Reading today’s strip in that context at least lends a little intrigue.

March Madness

Ah, yes: Montoni’s famous solid gold jukebox. Batiuk’s fond of saying that Montoni’s Pizzeria is a replication of  Luigi’s Restaurant in Akron, OH, “right down to the nails in the floor.” But an image found on Flickr shows a rather more mundane ‘box in that real-world establishment. I guess Tom felt that a classic round-top Wurlitzer would add some charm. Sadly though, whoever colors these strips either has never seen a Wurlitzer, or is too lazy or incompetent to color it in any shade but sickly yellow.

Anni-worse-ary

Congratulations to Harry and Harriet Dinkle on their fiftieth wedding anniversary! Say, Harry: between your teacher’s pension, the proceeds from your multi-volume autobiography, and the royalties from your compositions, I bet you’re planning a really special surprise for the Mrs. Maybe a cruise, or a trip to Europe, or a…a party at Montoni’s. Yes, Harriet will be surprised, all right: surprised at what a cheap bastard she’s been married to for fifty years.

John Philip Snooze-a

I hope you’ve all enjoyed the stellar snark of Epicus Doomus these last two weeks as much as I have! A new mystery guest author sits in starting Monday, July 15! —TFH

Discuss: “Sousa marches sound best when they’re surrounded by a town square.” Well, for starters, it seems rather like the town square is surrounded by the music: it waves through the air like one of those advertising banners that gets towed by a small plane. And I’d wager that Sousa marches sound best when they’re played by, say, the United States Marine Band. When played by an ensemble small enough to fit in a gazebo that’s about the size of my bathroom, they sound, well, okay.

So in his retirement, “Harry seems to be working harder than ever”? Really? Harder then he did when he used to force his students to march in torrential rains? Harder than when he used to personally deliver band turkeys? Since he hung up his band director hat, all we’ve seen Harry doing is lurking around the high school and occasionally schmoozing with his fellow music educators.