Corporal Cory’s Conundrum

Link to today’s strip

One has to wonder why Holly went to the trouble of shipping that comic book to Cory in Afghanistan if he was only going to come home and stash it a few weeks later anyway. One also wonders how someone “writing” a story like this would manage to overlook that rather glaring lapse of logic…unless you’re a regular FW reader, that is. Because if you are, you not only understand completely, but you wouldn’t settle for anything less. Or more, as the case may be.

“Holly purchases SJ comics for Cory” is the only moving part in this glacially paced little tale, so it was very helpful of The Corporal to once again explain via some clunky expository dialog that he is still a SJ collector who’s missing a few key issues, as that fact might have gotten lost amidst all that holiday excitement. Such a fine young man and so fortunate to have a mom who took a sincere interest in his hobbies as soon as he was 12,000 miles away. And with a gal like Rocky behind him there’s just no telling how high Cory could fly…teacher, pizza shop owner, comic book store guy…such a limitless future.

12 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

12 responses to “Corporal Cory’s Conundrum

  1. So, let me make sure I understand this: Holly buys comics for Cory, then doesn’t send them to him even though he’s risking his life in a combat zone and is going without so many comforts that we take for granted here. Instead she hides them in his room and doesn’t tell him about it when he comes home for a visit, instead waiting for the off chance that he’ll take time to thoroughly examine his collection, notice some additions, and comment on it, so that she can pull a smug, “Gee, I wonder how that could have happened?” act.

    Even when people do nice things in this strip, they go about it in a dickish, passive-aggressive way.

  2. bayoustu

    That hideous, malevolent presence lurking outside Corby’s window in Panel 3; why surely it must be Batboy himself, the merciless Dark Overlord of the Funkyverse!

  3. Epicus Doomus

    TheDiva: See, the way I read it was that the comic that “Rocky gave him” IS the one Holly picked up from Rocky’s mom, which meant that she went through all that trouble even though Rocky could have just given Cory the comic herself when they came home for the holidays a few weeks later. The one Holly stashed is the one DSH John gave her for free. I think, although he’s not really making this story very clear or coherent so who the hell really knows.

  4. Gyre

    TheDiva, there are no active efforts in FW. The lesson is that people should passively wish something would happen.

    Okay, I’m being mean but seriously; people rarely are proactive in this series. Even when they ARE proactive like going to get new comics they don’t actually DO anything with them.

  5. Rusty

    If Cory wants to get any Rocky action he better hide that comic book collection. Rocky has put aside such childish things.

  6. Jeffcoat Wayne

    So the only reason Cory collects Starbuck Jones comics is because the issues match his bedsheets and curtains?

  7. Chyron HR

    Did Holly know Cory was coming home for the holidays? I thought he came back without telling anyone just so he could stalk Holly and Funky to the Christmas tree lot and ambush them there.

  8. Charles

    God damn, here’s a kid in the army on a mine-sweeping unit who looks to be about 11 years old. Having him looking at his little picture books of superheroes doesn’t help much in warding off that impression either.

    He’s got no muscle tone at all, and he’s shorter than his mom. Simply put, he’s got the body of a pre-pubescent girl.

  9. billytheskink

    Fortunately, Charles, Cory did at least manage to avoid whatever chromosome gave his mother a toad mouth. Holly looks like she just arrived from an Arnold Lobel book there in panel 2.

  10. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    “An issue I’ve never owned before……….” Brilliant. Just brilliant writing, Tommy. I’ve read Rescue Rangers shipping fan fictions written with less stilted dialogue.

  11. John

    Tom Batiuk: “And so the evil, stupid teenager went on with his worthless life, completely unaware of the noble, brilliant sacrifices the all-wise, all-knowing ADULT made for him.”

    Reader: “What.”

    Tom Batiuk: “All he’s doing is risking his life with mines! HIS parents are BUYING HIM COMICAL BOOKS.”

    Reader: “…uh….”

    Tom Batiuk: “Anyway, the military is evil and stuff. And stupid. *mutters incoherently* WHERE’S my AWARD?!?”

    Reader: *face palm*

  12. Bactching it with a cup a coffee

    It’s just so stupid and awkwardly written. It could be good, as Gyre says, but I just don’t care much anymore!

    But I’ll still come back to revel in the mediocrity.