Robert Faceplant

Hey all! SoSfDavidO here and… wow. We’re still here at Montoni’s with Crazy Harry and he’s still rambling about Apple’s music recommendation algorithms. What can I possibly say about today’s strip that we haven’t already said?

Can’t breathe.. I’m suffocating in a comedy black hole…



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

33 responses to “Robert Faceplant

  1. Epicus Doomus

    I honestly didn’t think this piece of garbage could get any dumber, but here we are. What is Harry saying here? What the f*ck is a “lean-back list”? What f*cking difference does it make? You mean he knew all along that a connection between these artists existed yet he STILL chose to run with this terrible idea? This is nothing but the demented jabbering of a madman, a complete lunatic. There were a hundred ways to make this premise amusing and somehow he deftly managed to avoid every single one of them. Great job, BatHack.

  2. batgirl

    I cannot believe that Crazy Harry knows there is such a thing as alt-country. Or alt-anything. And no way has he ever heard of Alison Krause.

  3. It just gets worse and worse…so, even though he acknowledges that Robert Plant’s music has changed, he’s essentially saying “but that’s not REAL Robert Plant music!” He doesn’t even realize that he’s arguing that artists should never evolve, that they should always produce the same type of material that they did when he was younger. And yet he bristles whenever people suggest that his comic should be like it used to…

  4. Wouldn’t it be great if Robert Plant saw these strips and contacted Batiuk about them? Of course, I’m sure Plant has more important things to do with his time, even if Batiuk doesn’t…

  5. HAnzMFG

    Soooo… “Lean Back List”? Is this our newest entry to the Batiuktionary?

  6. Witness, then, a mind baked and painted in the 1970s, being broken under the weight of the decades hence. It’s like someone just woke up from a suspended animation experiment, and immediately hated the world because it was no longer the one he had captured in his cartoons.

  7. billytheskink

    At least Les isn’t in this strip, he probably thinks Robert Plant is the guy who shot John Darling.

  8. Wait, are we spending a whole WEEK on this?! A conversation that wouldn’t be held between a couple of hipster college students who just started discovering Wilco?

  9. HeyItsDave

    Crazy Harry ought to hang out with Clint Eastwood. Clint can yell at an empty chair and Harry can bitch at his Victrola.

  10. It does make you wonder what The Author’s problem is. As mentioned above, he seems to have objections to an artist developing and exploring new ways of expressing him/herself over time.

    And, yes, it does seem we’re going to have a whole week of three prematurely old men complaining about Robert Plant (the only thing missing but maybe yet to come is someone calling him a sell-out for “abandoning” his Led Zepplin roots). How pathetic – Crankshaft almost comes across less curmudgeonly.

  11. Yes, Gerard. None of this really makes much sense.

  12. So basically, Crazy Harry’s argument is: “This computer algorithm didn’t read my mind and determine the narrow segment of Robert Plant’s career that I’m interested in and make suggestions based on that, therefore it is stupid and wrong.”

    I have a Tumblr account, and that is STILL the most idiotic cause for indignant outrage I have ever seen.

  13. JerrytheMacGuy

    First World problems truly suck.

  14. Epicus Doomus

    It is pretty funny how Harry is carrying on like including Emmylou Harris on his playlist is mandatory somehow, like he simply doesn’t have a choice but to accept it. In Westview, playlist chooses YOU!

    Why didn’t he just use Led Zep on Monday and Tuesday instead of Plant? It would have seemed like more of a contrast and obscured the connection a bit and would have made today’s strip almost nearly reasonably close to being almost somewhat clever in a stupid sort of way.

    But he blew it…again. Allow me to clue you in on exactly why he didn’t win that Pulitzer: he couldn’t write his way out of a wet paper bag with a Fisher space pen and a machete. So gutless too, I mean just have these three idiots sit around and blather about how much the old rock stars of their youth have changed if that’s your goal, don’t meander around the point with a bunch of incoherent gobbledygook.

  15. Jon I Am

    Only in Funky Winkerbean could characters get mopey because an online music service didn’t come up with a playlist of songs they like.

  16. As if it were not bad enough that we have the slang that never caught on and the admission of a connection being discounted because the artist insists on rigid categories that congealed ages ago and the fact that six days will be squandered on a pointless first world problem, we’re expected to validate his panic at being asked to consider if his pigeon-holing is stupid and makes him an old man.

  17. Chyron HR

    “If you like Huey Lewis and the News, you may enjoy Phil Collins, YOU! STUPID! BASTARD!”

  18. Rusty Shackleford

    Another day, another masterpiece. Brilliant story telling.

  19. Professor fate

    Still have no idea the source of Crazy’s outrage. And my I take real exception to saying Emmlou Harris isn’t serious. Unless the author listens to songs like red dirt girl for the laughs.

  20. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    You could take all the people who find this storyline interesting, put them in a phone booth, and still have room to practice the trombone.

  21. Wait…Tom Batiuk, Tom Batiuk is saying that an artist shouldn’t change, that he should keep doing what people like? Wow. This…this is really something. You sure you want to make that argument, Tom?

  22. sgtsaunders

    That mailman is one sick puppy. Excuse me. Former mailman.

  23. HAnzMFG: Soooo… “Lean Back List”? Is this our newest entry to the Batiuktionary?

    Thank you for the suggestion! Find it in between “killer shark” and “Le Chat Bleu”.


    Hey, I get Crazy’s plight. I googled Bloom County and Peanuts once and got suggestions for Funky Winkerbean. In what world is Funky Winkerbean considered a good comic strip? An outrage!

  25. Jimmy

    Tomorrow, Harry waxes nostalgic about how Robert Plant was great in Thin Lizzy.

  26. @beckoningchasm: He sees himself as being the exception.

  27. SpacemanSpiff85

    I really get the impression that Batiuk is just writing down random conversations he’s had in his own life and passing them off as strips, without even an attempt to make them interesting or funny.

  28. SpacemanSpiff85

    It’s also pretty funny how Batiuk’s FW blog doesn’t really make any reference to the current strip at all. Most writers I’ve seen tend to use their blog to give a little background about the current stories, or at least mention it a little. He’s posted more about John Darling in the past year than FW. I’d say that’s a pretty blatant sign that he doesn’t give a crap, as if anyone needed one. Looking just at the blog you’d assume he retired a long time ago.

  29. Also, TFHackett, as pointed out in today’s Crankshaft at the Comics Curmudgeon, there’s also “Granpa Google” which I believe has been been used in the past in this strip by Mopey Pete as well. Batiuktionary two-fer today?

  30. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    I’m pretty sure Tom Batlick meant the following by “lean-back listening.” He’s really fly:

    ma [homeys] don’t dance they just pull their pants and do the rockaway
    Lean Back (Brooklyn)
    Lean Back (Uptown)
    Lean Back (Queensbridge)
    Lean Back (Bronx)
    say Ma [homeys] don’t dance they just pull up their pants and do the rockaway
    Lean Back, Lean Back, Lean Back

  31. Charles

    Only in Funky Winkerbean could characters get mopey because an online music service didn’t come up with a playlist of songs they like.

    That’s the thing; he’s not mopey. Look at him in panel 3. He’s ANGRY. It’s absurd. He’s angry because a playlist apparently sourced from Robert Plant included a Emmylou Harris song. He’s so angry about it that he goes out the next day and bitches to his friends about it. This is a viable topic of lengthy conversation for them. The inclusion of Emmylou Harris must have killed his boner or something.

    When I lived out west, there was an old guy who would do nothing but ride the busline that went by my house all day. No matter what time I’d get the bus, and no matter which way I was going, he’d be on it. He’d sit up front and talk to the bus driver, all day. He was obviously not all there, but he wasn’t hostile or anything, so the bus driver seemed to tolerate him just fine. He’d just blabber on about whatever he was looking at or whatever he had experienced earlier that day.

    And where I live now, there’s a young guy who occasionally goes into the local grocery store and talks to the guys at the meat department about whatever pops into his head. He’s also got psychiatric issues, and since he’s not hostile, the guys in the meat department tolerate him hanging out for a random half hour here or there talking to them in odd jazz-improvisation-like conversations.

    I bring up these two stories because apparently Westview is filled with guys like these. Christ, the guy gets a suggestion on his iTunes he thinks is weird and that’s the center of his universe the next day. That’s a whole symposium for these goofs.