Allzinger’s Disease

I’d sure feel sorrier for these three nerds in today’s comic if nerd culture hadn’t exploded with the rise of the internet and now everyone is clamoring to show off their geek credentials. Every other damn movie is a comic book movie and they’re making bazillions. Comicon is anticipated more than a rock concert and uber nerds like Elon Musk are considered chic. Hell, everyone is walking around with the internet in their pockets. I haven’t seen anything from these two in the past ten years that screams nerd to me. A Green Lantern shirt and Loki Bobblehead doesn’t cut it anymore. You got picked on by Wedgeman? So did everyone else. No one understands you? Get in line. Or better yet, Alex, drop the sad mime look and make yourself presentable.

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24 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

24 responses to “Allzinger’s Disease

  1. bayoustu

    This is what qualifies as “light-hearted” in the Funkyverse- because it’s about rib-ticklin’ dementia and not cancer.

  2. billytheskink

    Walking there behind other-skunk-head, chullo-head, and banana-head… is that the original Stuck Funky banner kid? Poor fella’s been in high school since Act II. Two decades of classes with Les and Kablichnick… *shudder* now wonder he’s constantly downcast. Maybe it’s his brother. I hope it’s his brother.

    Alzheimer’s jokes, though, always winners.

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Owen, the same guy who runs the AV club, hosts the daily morning announcements, has acted as the football team’s costumed mascot and who’s been in the marching band for at least six or seven years, is put off by Cody’s ostentation display of Scapegoat pride, is he? Why sure, there’s a believable way to drag this idiotic premise out for another day, why not?

  4. SpacemanSpiff85

    Holy crap, Batiuk, we get it. That blonde girl Cindy is based on wouldn’t talk to you, so you sold all your comics and bought her a senior class ring, and she still wouldn’t talk to you, because you were a total creep. And you’ve hated senior class rings ever since.
    Move. On.

  5. So… the punch line is Alzheimer’s… huh.

  6. Let’s see….Schulz died angry because his dog died and kids teased him. Lynn Johnston used her strip to nag her family about every little thing that bothered her. Batiuk is still sore because some girl didn’t fall in love with a skeevy freak babbling about the stupidest junk culture ever. It seems that this industry attracts soreheads bitching about piddly-crap.

  7. Rusty Shackleford

    Wow, four stars on the crap rating today. One star for saying senior class ring, when the rest of the world calls them class rings and three stars for having high school kids talk like senior citizens.

    Oh wait, I get it now. Seniors, Senior citizens. Bwhaaaaaaahaha!

  8. And given that today Batty mines hilarity from the productive vein of old-age dementia jokes, expect tomorrow’s strip to cap off the series with somebody accidentally referring to the bauble as a “SENILE class ring.”

    At least that would provide a reason for the peculiar phrasing he’s used all week.

  9. Oh, what the hell, I couldn’t resist. Tomorrow’s punch line today:

  10. Say what you will, at least it’s not another day of gossiping about Wedgeman’s big hands.

  11. Next week: a fly lands on Owen’s desk, then takes off again. That might be worth two weeks of strips.

  12. So… the punch line is Alzheimer’s… huh.

    Wait! Have I already told you that?

  13. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    Is Tom Batiuk ever going to give us some clarity on what the relationship status is between these three? Are Chullo Boy & the 40 year old Goth an item? Is Cody in the closet on his love for Owen? Is one of these guys the third wheel in this horrific bicycle of a relationship? Anything, Batiuk? Any character development you want to share? Do you even know what character development is???!!! Or is just creating author avatars all you know how to do???!

  14. Gerard Plourde

    If Cody is that ambivalent about his high school why would he buy a class ring? The way he invokes magical thinking in hoping that he’ll be able to tolerate it someday in the future sounds like he’d be better off spending the money on therapy. Is everybody in Westview chronically depressed?

  15. WTF is with Goth Shelly Winters’ legs in panel 3? Can human beings actually walk that way?

  16. Saturnino

    “If Cody is that ambivalent about his high school why would he buy a class ring? The way he invokes magical thinking in hoping that he’ll be able to tolerate it someday in the future sounds like he’d be better off spending the money on therapy. Is everybody in Westview chronically depressed?”

    If there was somebody, anybody, in the staff of that school who took an interest in these kids, they could have been straightened out long ago.

    As it is, the defeat of the school levy on an annual basis (hint: time for another arc) could be seen as an act of mercy by the voters.

  17. Professor Fate

    You know I hated high school – really. Just hated hated hated it. couldn’t wait to get out. Didn’t even go to the prom – had to be brow beaten into going to the graduation ceremony.
    But you know what. I got over it. And while I still don’t view my high school years with any degree of fondness it doesn’t dominate my thoughts nor has it twisted me into whatever bitter angry creature the author has become.

  18. @Saturino–Maybe there’ll be some sort of Big Reveal in tomorrow’s strips that the three of them are special-needs kids.

  19. Saturnino

    “But you know what. I got over it. And while I still don’t view my high school years with any degree of fondness it doesn’t dominate my thoughts nor has it twisted me into whatever bitter angry creature the author has become.”

    True, I see the folks I want to see and don’t see the rest. Those who are alive, of course, near 15% are already gone.

  20. Saturnino

    “@Saturino–Maybe there’ll be some sort of Big Reveal in tomorrow’s strips that the three of them are special-needs kids.”

    Or whatever thelatest cause du jour is……………………

  21. A HREF

    I swear to Bill Watterson that when I saw today’s FW over on The Comics Curmudgeon, I thought to myself “how nice of Josh to give ‘HeyItsDave” pardoy a platform.

    Only when I read Josh’s commentary did I realize it was TB’s work.

    TB is now doing self parody.

  22. This is an odd thing to say, but… exactly when did TB lose his mojo? For some reason I found myself looking at the teen pregnancy and Wally land mine arcs on his site and realized that those were crafted, thoughtful and even meaningful arcs. Not great but still worthwhile and different from comics pages fare. They started someplace and wound up someplace. But this stuff is utterly worthless, without plotting, nuance, humor, genuine emotion or even a semblance of character development to make you give a shit about these folks. I don’t even have the urge to mock them. Does he not even have a family or peers that recognize this and could gently tell him that these are not strips people would remember, much less want collected in a book? They are certainly different from other comics pages fare, though – they have an astounding level of banality currently unmatched on those pages.

  23. Epicus Doomus

    Fred Blurt: My opinion: he lost the will to “write” after he ran out of plausible ways to keep banging away on the “Lisa’s Story” drum. Check out the first few years of Act III and you’ll see that she was still front & center for a while.