Wait One Damn Minuet

Link To Today’s

Yes Tom, THESE KIDS TODAY are missing out on passing sections of the Sunday paper back and forth and (zzzzzz). They’re also missing out on gathering around the ol’ wireless and imagining what Amos and Andy really look like too. And NO ONE CARES!

Wow, what a painful two weeks THAT was. Now it’s time for me to pass the baton to Beckoning Chasm and his favorite (guffaw) character…that goddamned annoying old band director guy. Enjoy and as always stay Funky!



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “Wait One Damn Minuet

  1. Well, to be fair, the story today was two people sharing something. Almost as if they liked each other. So I’d put this one in the “dumb but at least positive” section.

  2. spacemanspiff85

    I can’t wait for next Sunday, when Funky’s talking about how much he misses having to crank up his car. And how kids today don’t know what they’re missing, not having to go out to an outhouse in the middle of the night.

  3. billytheskink

    This is not at all how passing around the Sunday paper goes. A more realistic version of this would go:

    -Are you finished with the funnies?
    -Oh, well where’s Parade?
    -I think they stick it in between the dog food coupons and the Sears circular.
    -Nope, not there. Wait, our Sears is still open?
    -I guess so, why else would they print the ad? Check under the car ads.
    -Hmmm, still no Parade… maybe it’s behind the mattress ads?
    -No, I already shuffled through those. Try looking in between the classifieds.
    -Still not seeing it. Oh well, I’ll read something else until we find it.
    -Fine, fine…
    -Are you finished with the funnies yet?
    -Still no, I’ve been talking to you for the past 5 minutes.
    -Oh, right. Right. Hmmm, where’s the business section?

  4. Rusty Shackleford

    So did Batty die and they have cheap Korean labor illustrating the strips? Holly looks different every day and Funky looks to be around 95 years old. Jesus man, have some pride in what you do. Jesus,

  5. Epicus Doomus

    Man I really miss the old pull-top cans where the whole ring would come off. And there electric can openers…what, turning a crank isn’t good enough anymore? And this guitar rock…do they really need all that distortion? Buddy Holly sure didn’t.

  6. More like Generation Zzzzz, amirite? And I know he’s done a near identical Sunday paper bit already, I’m thinking with Les and Cayla, but I can’t be arsed to go and look it up. The strip at the top of the comic section of “The Paper” is “Big George “. Anyone know if this is a tip o’ the Funky felt tip to one of TB’s obscure faves, or another facet of his fervid imagination?

  7. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “The Sunday paper minuet.”

    “Kind of makes me sorry I never learned to read.”

  8. Epicus Doomus

    Great-Grandpappy Batom, circa 1925:

    “Confounded iceboxes. I miss the ol’ root cellar.”

    The first Batom settlement in the New World, circa the early 1700s:

    “Tarnation! These tallow candles don’t provide nearly enough light to properly read this parchment scroll! I miss our old town crier!”

    Distant, distant Batom ancestors, biblical times:

    “You gods today with the newfangled stone tablets. I miss doing cave paintings with oxen blood.”

    Batomous Complainalotamous, the first known reptile:

    “Dry land…bah. I miss my gills.”

  9. Jim in Wisc.

    @TFHackett: It was a strip done by Virgil Partch, that ran from 1960 – 1990. According to Toonpedia, Partch was killed in an auto accident in 1984, but he had so many strips drawn, that the syndicate was able to keep running his strip for another six years. The fact that Partch worked so far in advance is probably why Batiuk is a fan of the strip.

  10. Great. Bitching about stupid people are for ridding themselves of an inconvenience AND blind worship of another clod who valued output over content.

  11. Gerard Plourde

    @ beckoningchasm – I guess we should give points for the mostly positive tone, but it seems odd that they don’t actually discuss what they’ve read. No talk about the lead story “Corruption at City Hall Uncovered”? Or sports?

  12. @ Paul Jones – The big difference is that Partch was not only prolific, he was also consistently funny.

  13. Professor Fate

    One does wonder why when the Author is trying to celebrate the simple things in life like this he still manages to come across as both smug and bitter.

  14. You have to know a bit about Cancerdeathville to understand the punch line, “Makes you feel sorry for Generation Z.” Funky’s talking about the local law that says people MUST read “The Paper” every day or be herded into “re-education” camps. While he and Holly are enjoying their morning coffee, the young-uns are being subjected to terrible mind-control practices that even the KGB declines to use. Many of them are reduced to a zombie-like state; hence the term “Generation Z.”

  15. Don

    Should we be concerned about the City Hall corruption? IIRC, the last time a newspaper was in a background scene, it played an important part (I think it was right when Lisa died – Les ran by a newspaper box that had a story about hostages being taken somewhere, and Wally’s picture was on it)

  16. Random thorts… I wonder the same thing about city hall… this was a very gentle, amiable, wry, even, Sunday strip, aimed at the demographic who still buy Sunday papers and have that comfortable Sunday ritual… it also gives away who TB is writing for (hint: it ain’t Gen Z or millennials, who will never read FW) these days, which is to say, TB’s peer group of 65 and older… so much for depicting young adults facing contemporary issues… speaking of those issues, because TB writes a year in advance, he by definition is not writing about contemporary anything, nor can he risk taking on a genuinely timely topic like, say, politics or sports or a new cultural phenom; can you imagine what a disaster it would be if he had a character talking about a female president or a church shooter?… but topicality is precisely what gives many strips their edge and relevance, even when doing it obliquely so they don’t get yanked for the week or moved to the op-Ed page; TB is too artistically timid to go all in nowadays, which is why he’ll never truly “explore” (to use his own term) the deeper nuances of, say, concussion injuries in sports, which is also why he’ll never get an award like he came close to getting with the cancer saga… The nod to the other strip writer was telling, too, proof that he can wield subtlety even on an Easter egg level when motivated… And I remain firm in my belief that he does not draw Sunday strips; put this weeks 6 side by side today’s and tell me if those characters look remotely similar aside from some generic middle age qualities.

  17. Epicus Doomus

    He already has a grumpy old man comic strip and IMO he should leave his grumpy old ramblings there. The way he’s bouncing around from unfinished arc to unfinished arc has always been annoying but lately it’s been even worse.


    You know…it is possible to read the news together with your significant other. Me and the misses actually due read newspaper articles together on our respective e-readers and even watch the news together. But you know what? When we do talk we don’t just say things like pass that section and pass this section. We actually do discuss the news and articles together. For all we know Funky & Holly spend the rest of the morning reading their paper in dead silence.