Porous Another One

I’ve had so much fun doing this. It’s like being a little comic book company…I’m going back and I’m going to dip into some of the other characters I created in the fifth grade…I’m going to resurrect them and put them to good use in the strip. I’ll tell you about one. I have a character, The Amazing Mister Sponge…

Tom Batiuk, 2014

A superhero with a name like “The Amazing Mister Sponge” gives us a good idea why the “big” comic book companies gave the air to young Thomas Martin Batiuk. I do like the name “Killjoy” for a villainous evil clown; but I wouldn’t need “porifera vision” to discern a frowning clown with a gangsta teardrop tattoo, toting a huge rifle, to be a criminal.

Thinking caps on, chums...
Speaking of superheroes, the only person I’ve ever heard use “chum” as a form of address is Adam West’s Batman, may he rest in peace. The superhero theme allows Rick Burchett to work a little more in his element in the first two panels. But he’s taken some liberties with the bricks in panel 3–they’re not consistent at all–and he’s drawn Bernie to resemble a bespectacled 8-year-old.

So much for my two-week turn in the barrel! Tune in tomorrow when beckoningchasm takes over for a spell.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

15 responses to “Porous Another One

  1. Rusty

    I miss Owen and Cody.

  2. Eldon of Galt

    Some prime nonsense today from Bernie (who appears to have regressed to about age six).
    So he says Mr. Sponge has the vision of a sponge. How does that connect to the detection of criminals?
    This would seem to be an attempt to link the words “peripheral” and “porifera”, words so dissimilar that no one could possibly get a pun out of it.
    So, what we have here, once again, is a torturous effort that totally fails as a joke. A special level of non-achievement.

    Deep inside reference: That odd statement Mr. Sponge makes to Killjoy? A direct swipe (probably intended as a “homage”) of a well-known botched line uttered by Captain America in a 1960’s story.

  3. Rusty Shackleford

    Nice thesaurus use Batty. Now can we have something entertaining? Yes, we know you can use big words, nobody cares.

  4. Today’s strip could stand as a metaphor for the whole thing: we have glum, unidentifiable people reacting wanly to horrid, forced wordplay as they talk about something no one could possibly care about.

  5. “Only one of us is getting out alive, and it’s not going to be me!” says the hero? That makes zero sense. Much like the entire episode, but that, especially.

  6. Epicus Doomus

    That BanTom is a weird one all right. When it comes to creating new characters that mind of his is downright fertile, but when it comes to finding things for those characters to do and say he’s totally barren.


    1. Okay so you plan on dying then, Sponge. You said you didn’t want to be the one that gets out alive, dude! The villain is just complying with your wishes.

    2. I know comic book logic, but this is where using real bullets instead of water would really help not-Joker here.

    3. This actually would be interesting if this was an actual nerd argument on superheros. But no. It’s another terrible and confusing pun. Further proving the deadly teaching influence of Les Moore.

  8. spacemanspiff85

    I know the point of that stupid comic panel is that Sponge is sacrificing himself for his sidekick, but since literally all he’s doing is standing there letting himself get shot at (man, what an exciting superhero!), all the clown would have to do is pull out another gun and shoot the sidekick with it while Sponge just stands there. Or, you know, stop shooting the guy whose power is holding up a sponge. Hell, for that matter, why doesn’t the useless sidekick sneak around and punch the clown in the face? It’s amazing how colossally Batiuk screws up basic things. I guess that’s what happens when you half-ass everything yet still think you’re a genius writer.
    On that note, did anyone else notice the photo Batiuk posted of his table at a comic convention, where he made sure to print off a sign showcasing the awards he’s won?

  9. Rusty Shackleford


    Yeah I saw it. Sigh. I wonder how many sales he racked up. I wouldn’t think many. And my father would not be happy if I gave him one of those books for Father’s Day. Culture? Really?

  10. Merry Pookster

    Who are these 3 people?
    No really… who the frock are they?

  11. This is just pathetic. This first two panels were verbatim from a couple of Captain America panels when Stan Lee was writing the series. And did we need another killer clown? I had my fill last fall. Bernie looks and acts as if he belongs in a special needs class. Another week down the toilet.

  12. spacemanspiff85

    @Rusty Shackleford;
    Honestly, if you have to tell everyone what awards you’ve received, you probably shouldn’t bother. If it’s an important comic book award, and your audience is people attending a comic book convention, most of them probably would’ve heard of it already.
    “You won ‘Best Comic Strip Produced in Ohio by a Former Teacher’? Um, okay . . .”

  13. Rusty Shackleford

    @spaceman. Pretty sure the award was for Best Comic strip…by a former Northeast Ohio teacher. There is a lot of talent in Southern Ohio! 🙂

  14. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    I think in the action panel the art looks like it was done by a talented 6th grader. I like the concept that Killjoy the Klown has broken into the U.S. Strategic Tear Gas Reserve to power his Tear-Zooka and rule the world. The girl puts Bernie down in the last panel, so I like her already.

    I say, if you win an award, show it! Even if it’s the “Second Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence”, you shove it in your critics’ faces! (Us.) Well played, TB.

  15. Rusty Shackleford

    Nah, no need to show off your awards.

    Award winning work speaks for itself. And some of Batty’s older material was clever, creative, and deserving of recognition, but that was a long time ago.