The written content of today’s strip makes “trivia” look like Tolstoy, so I’m going to ignore it. Despite Dexter Myles constant pointing. What the hell is that guy’s deal? “The fingah! The fingah!”
No, what I want to draw your attention to is the object in the glass case in panel one.
It’s not a flying saucer. It’s not a hubcap. It’s Jay Garrick’s hat.
I hate myself for knowing this and typing it out at you, but the original golden age Flash was a guy named Jay Garrick. He safeguarded his secret identity by…putting on a hat. Seriously, no mask, no hood, just a hat. “Jay, are you secretly the Flash?” “Of course not, that’s silly!” (puts on hat) “Oh my gosh, Flash, how did you get here? And where’s Jay?” Finally, we have someone who makes Superman’s glasses look like a James Bond disguise.
But that’s not what worries me.
If someone was going to build a comic strip museum, you couldn’t put a baseball cap and glove, or a yellow porkpie hat, into a glass case and claim they belonged to Charlie Brown and Dick Tracy respectively. Because neither of those folks exist, so it’s not possible to possess items that they used.
So, then, someone made a replica of Jay Garrick’s hat for the museum. “So what?” you’re probably asking me. But why would they do that? What does the hat by itself do, when you could get a more complete impression by making a statue of Jay Garrick wearing his hat? Both are equally fake, but the second makes more sense. Unless…
–unless The Flash is a real person in Funky Winkerbean, and that’s Jay Garrick’s actual hat. And he donated it to the museum. Suddenly, all of this makes sense. No. No, no. No, it doesn’t. But it seems logically consistent, given the contents of The Flash Museum in Central City. But if there are actual superheroes in the Funkyverse, why are there comic books? Why does Pete struggle to write them, when he can just read the newspaper and copy what actually happened? How come these heroes never save anyone–yet get gigantic museums in their honor? Could you hire Superman to destroy Westview, because evil? Why hasn’t he done so already?