I’m not Byeing It

SosfDavidO here, and boy, looking at the back of the head of an unknown character while they run through a disjointed inner monologue sure makes for a terrible comic, as today’s flaming garbage dumpster of a strip shows.

Just turn him around, already, Tombat! We either not going to recognize him or we’re not going to care. This isn’t a clickbait article designed to pique our interest and trick us into clicking on a link about how child celebrities have physically aged. We don’t care, and we’re caring less and less each day.

Where is Summer!? Why was she written out of the strip? She’s been relegated to moving boxes whenever someone moves in or out of the apartment above Montoni’s and that’s it. Instead of catching up with the only child of Les Moore and Saint Lisa, we’re stuck here with Capt’n Exposition telling us about things we the reader already know.

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25 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

25 responses to “I’m not Byeing It

  1. Epicus Doomus

    Ha ha. This gag is as old as bye weeks themselves. This ponderous and really obvious trip down Bad Memory Lane must have some sort of loosely-interpreted point, but whether we ever get to it is anyone’s guess. I would imagine this would confuse someone who only started reading FW a few years ago back when the Scapegoats were good but of course we all know that no such hypothetical readers exist.

  2. billytheskink

    “The Scapegoats came by their name honestly… Westview was founded by geeks cast off into the Cuyahoga Valley wilderness by the Comics Code Authority to atone for the sin that is The Amazing Mr. Sponge.”

    Canadian football spotted in panel 3!

    • Jimmy

      Good catch. High schools and colleges go with half-stripe balls these days.Maybe the Scapegoats are playing by Commie Canadian Football rules while everyone else is playing by righteous American football rules. That would explain the constant punting on third down.

  3. So I’m confused. Was Starbuck Jones on the Big Walnut Tech team or were they who the Xaxian Warriors played for?

  4. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    I actually think the name “Scapegoats” was one of the better gags in FW back in the old days before the strip got preachy, smirky, and just weird.

  5. If Summer comes back she’ll be the girls’ coach, and will be totally subordinated to the gray-haired white man in the letterman’s jacket. Because what’s a Funkyverse woman without a man over her?

  6. Spacemanspiff85

    Batiuk’s been doing this an awful lot lately, basically just mentioning jokes that used to be in the strip, without adding anything at all. He’s brought up Holly’s flaming baton trick a lot over the last year or so, and he just randomly brought back the sentient computer without any explanation. The only people who’d appreciate this are people who’ve read the strip since the beginning, but I’ve got to imagine they’d hate everything else about this strip, since it morphed into melodrama and is now just lazy, wish-fulfillment garbage.
    It reminds me of Tony Soprano saying “remember when is the lowest form of conversation”, but one thing I’ve learned about this strip is that it can always go even lower.

    • Gerard Plourde

      It must bother him that when he decided to move from “Gag a day” to a serious format that he had saddled himself with snarky names. In real life, no school board would allow a high school to name its teams The Scapegoats. Rather than just not mentioning the team name, he highlights and defends it. Apparently that’s the point of this otherwise bizarre arc,

      • You’d have thought that he’d have retconned all the snarky bullcrap into the jealous nattering of a helmet-haired jerk who’s pissed off that he was never within striking distance of being cool or popular.

  7. The worst of it is that he takes offense to people calling his strip poorly executed nonsense that spends too much damned time whining about a dead past or silly diversions like Starbuck Jones and not enough on a younger generation that will outlive him. That’s the key, I think: he won’t be alive for their middle age so their stories ain’t worth telling.

  8. Chyron HR

    Every week you get paid for this half-assed “it’s called writing” is a bye week, Tom.

  9. DOlz

    I just finished watching season 3 of “Fargo”. It started off with several disjointed threads that it gradually pulled together to tell a complete story. It also had a few stories that weren’t necessary to the main story, but still were interesting and concluded.

    In short an interesting story that was worth my time or the antithesis of TB’s work. You TB are no Noah Hawley.

  10. bobanero

    You’d think he would at least have some familiar FW character doing the reminiscing, instead of some mystery throw-away character. What are the chances that there is going to be some meaningful conclusion to this week’s arc? Are there any band/terrible football team jokes that he hasn’t used yet? It’s really infuriating as a reader to endure weeks like this, because we know TB over the years has put some effort into developing a decent collection of characters in the Funkyverse, but then he just lets them die on the vine. It wouldn’t be that difficult to replace this week’s nonsense arc with an arc that shows what Summer and Keisha are up to at Kent State, or what Cory/Rocky are doing (WTF are they doing, anyway? How many years ago were they discharged from the Army? You can only survive so long on the proceeds of a comic book collection sale).

  11. hitorque

    Okay, fine, we get it — Westview and everything associated with it has sucked donkey dick for half a century… Why are we re-hashing well-established canon for a whole week?

  12. Jimmy

    What former Walnut Tech Star Buddy McMasters Looks Like Now Will Shock You!

  13. Professor Fate

    I think the Bye joke has to be at least 35 years old as that was the first time I variant on it – that a team in a tournament with a Bye was so bad that that Bye went onto the next round.
    Oh yes other than they guy with the food truck (Frankie? – I refuse to look it up) do we know anybody from Big Walnut?

  14. Don

    Summer joined the Church of LesMooreIanism and spent two years on a retreat, so she has two years of college basketball eligibility left