Bull Run

Wow, the ol’ man didn’t lay it too easy on Bull in today’s harsh-a-thon, letting Bull know he had an obvious “tell” before running a play. Speaking of tells, this guy just TOLD Bull he’s an idiot and that the Scapegoats losses are squarely on his shoulders.

Whelp, enjoy the rest of your retirement Bull!


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

14 responses to “Bull Run

  1. count of tower grove

    BWAWHAWHAWHAW! It’s funny because Doug Downlowe is telling Bull what a lousy player he was in a thoughtful, sensitive manner!

  2. Gerard Plourde

    So does this mean that Bull was either the ball carrier or the intended receiver on every play Westview ran, whether a pass play or a rnnning play? Poor Bull! No wonder he suffers from CTE.

  3. Epicus Doomus

    That’s right, Fat Boy, the team didn’t suck…YOU did! Bull Bushka…tactical genius, master of subterfuge. This should help speed up Bull’s decline nicely and give him a whole new level of regret to deal with before he forgets it all. In a way he’s one of the lucky Westviewians who won’t be wallowing in nostalgia until he dies, unlike the rest of them.

    I like how this Buck asshole felt compelled to tell him this like it was yet another golden WHS moment he had to share. What a pal. Even the Big Walnut Tech alums are jerks, it must be some sort of regional quirk.

  4. This will probably end up leading to Linda tripping on a Big Walnut Tech pennant on the one yard line when trying to scatter Bull’s ashes in a month or so after he shoots himself for failure. There’s rubbing it in and then there’s going “Hey, Stupid! We can SEE!!!” like Buck did.

  5. Rusty Shackleford

    Why is he telling him this now?

    • DOlz

      Because in TB’s world people wait until they can be the biggest dick possible before revealing anything. This guy has been waiting years for this and now he can die happy (or what passes for happy in Funkytown).

    • Comic Book Harriet

      Because TB only just now thought of including it.

  6. Rusty

    I’m finding it hard to believe that a scout could pick that up while sitting in the stands away from the field. Unless Bull had clown shoes on his feet, so maybe?

  7. 1. In true Funkyverse fashion, I’m guessing Buck Belue isn’t showing up out of the blue to atone or show contrition — He’s here to twist the knife…

    2. Seriously, unless Bull and this BWT guy met or knew each other in their adult lives, why would Bull even recognize him, much less remember his name?

    3. In some alt-reality sane dimension, Bull would be laughing his ass off that a grown-ass man in his mid-50s could be so obsessed with his high school glories that he needs to boast about it to opponents 40 years later…

  8. billytheskink

    Wait, do Bull and Linda live in a mobile home now? A mobile home with a bay window and containing a chair made out of the traveling green shirt?

  9. bobanero

    Well, it’s been well established that TB has zero fundamental knowledge of the game of football, and consistently bends the rules to suit whatever narrative he wants to present (it’s called writing, or something like that). I’m not sure exactly what narrative he’s trying to present here. Is this guy trying to make Bull feel better, knowing that maybe he wasn’t such a terrible fullback after all, or maybe realize that he really was more terrible a fullback than he thought he was, since his gestures gave away what he was going to do. Whatever it is, it certainly wasn’t worth sitting through a week and a half of Buck Winslow’s inner dialogue just to hear it.

  10. Epicus Doomus

    Maybe next week Mary Lou Sweetwater will track Les down and inform him that she used to fantasize about him back in high school. Or maybe Lisa’s old doctor will tell Les that he totally screwed up her treatment and she never had to die. It’s pretty funny how this Buck asshole waited forty (or fifty) years to tell Bull this, like he was just living with this secret all that time. Every single character in FW is demented.

  11. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “Yep, you always were a crappy football player and an even worse human being. I just thought you’d like to know. Well, I better get back to Bigwalnut Town before they roll up the sidewalks, heh, heh. Have a nice evening!”

    “Oh, by the way, ma’am, that coffee sucked!”

  12. SpacemanSpiff85

    “Uh, yeah. I’ve coached multiple teams to championships, so fuck you, buddy.”