Bloop Bloop.

There is less than nothing going on today.

This is like when horrible one note authors attempt to pad out their paychecks by writing the same story again, but gender flipped or from the guy’s perspective this time! We have reached Life and Death or Grey levels of storytelling here people.

So because there is no plot to speak of. I’ll just point out some tidbits I noticed in each panel.

Panel 1.) Boy Lisa’s table seems positioned in the middle of the room, instead of up against a wall, and his overhead light seems to be behind his head AND pointed away from his workstation. He asks if the text is ‘more script changes’ which means that they regularly get TEXTS of script changes in a major motion picture sequel. Pete has a tiny phone.

Panel 2.) You know that this is California because of the medical marijuana growing right outside the window. Pete’s hands are the size of his head and the bags under his eyes have drifted so far down his cheek they might as well be Tony Montana scars. Pete’s phone has grown in size.

Panel 3.) Boy Lisa’s desk light is now in front of him. His face is a horrifying mask with terrible pencil eyebrows drawn all the way up on his forehead. He is apparently wearing a black v-neck t-shirt like a total tool. We can see that Pete’s now minuscule cell phone isn’t even a touchscreen smart phone, but rather some knockoff blackberry-lite. I link a picture of my phone, for reference. Sad, cheap, pathetic reference.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

21 responses to “Bloop Bloop.

  1. Epicus Doomus

    No Boy Lisa, it’s Chester Hagglemore, defensive tackle for the Baltimore Ravens. How many Chester Hagglemores can he possibly know? Did Batiuk really feel it might be necessary to reiterate that Chester is in fact a wealthy comic book collector just in case he readers forgot the entire premise of the character overnight?

    And let me see if I have this right: after spending a week and a half badgering John about getting him in touch with Pete, Chester just texts him? So Chester has some sort of brilliant secret scheme he’s hatching (right now I’m leaning toward a SJ reboot) so he goes to Komix Korner and confides in a well-established blabbermouth for no reason whatsoever, then just texts Pete directly? That’s some boffo storytelling all right.

    WTF is “Detective Chimp”? His attempts at writing cool “hip” slang dialog for characters like Pete are always so sad and dismal. Maybe someday before he hangs it up he’ll try telling a story that gets to the point in a panel or two instead of two or three weeks, as this easily could have been the first strip of the arc without sacrificing anything at all.

    • erdmann

      Detective Chimp (a.k.a. Bobo) is, as the name suggests, a crime-solving chimpanzee who first appeared in the pages of DC Comics’ “Rex the Wonder Dog” in 1952. His most recent appearance was in a book published just last week. Considerably more intelligent than these two combined, he would be justified in flinging poo at Pete for daring to compare Durwood to him in any way.

  2. billytheskink

    Expecting script changes to arrive by text message? A future blockbuster these two are working on, for sure…

  3. Epicus Doomus

    He does this all the time and it always annoys me. He seemingly forgets the events of the very story he’s telling, just completely out of nowhere. Why did Chester visit the Korner at all? And the reason for the visit…getting Pete’s contact information…wasn’t even shown. And on top of that it was implied that John had to be involved which ultimately he wasn’t. The reader is left to speculate on what happened which is amazing considering he devoted NINE strips to Chester’s pointless visit which was rendered totally meaningless in one panel today. And in spite of all that we STILL don’t even know what Chester wants. It isn’t just slow paced, it isn’t paced at all.

  4. spacemanspiff85

    Yesterday: John says he’ll pass Chester’s information on to Pete.
    Today: Chester somehow got Pete’s information.
    Also, does Darin do this every time Pete’s phone rings? “Who’s that?”? That seems like something an insanely jealous lover would do, not a friend/co-worker.

    • hitorque

      Yeah, Batiuk keeps telling us these two jaggoffs are hetero instead of the closeted couple joined at the hip who got married in secret they’ve always been portrayed as…

  5. It sucks being right about how pointless Chester’s visit was. It’ll suck more being right about how stupid his scheme is. Compared to this, Crankshaft’s “If you don’t read, eventually Beanball Bushka will destroy YOUR chance of getting to the Majors” is sensible.

  6. Rusty Shackleford

    That’s the one thing Batty is good at: padding a story. He is also doing this with Crankshaft as he does a replay of how Ed couldn’t read and so he couldn’t make it to the Major Leagues.

    Are these cartoonists in a Union? How do they get away with getting paid so much for doing so little?

  7. There’s an extra “1” in the link to the strip. At least for me; removing the 1 makes the link work. Although putting “work” and “Funky Winkerbean” in the same context seems really, really wrong.

  8. “Bloop, Bloop.” A reference to Betty the Bloop from “Lost In Space?” That’s probably the only date Mopey Pete could find, but she’ll throw him over for Detective Chimp.

  9. Eldon of Galt

    The artwork does have a particularly ragged quality today. Perhaps the artist is crumbling into despair because he has spent ten days drawing this “story”, then received today’s instructions, which appears to be the first installment of the story he’s already working on.

    • spacemanspiff85

      I seriously doubt he got into art so he could draw days upon days of ugly, fat people who look far older than they should sitting around talking about comic books.

  10. Jim in Wisc.

    I dunno. Looks to me like Pete’s holding a 5th or 6th gen iPod Classic in the last panel.

  11. hitorque

    1. Um.. Didn’t “StarSux Jonez: Episode Zero” come out damn near a year ago? Why are they still writing/storyboarding the sequel when it should already be in filming on location, if not already completed??

    2. What happened to all the pre-release Oscar nominations the move was getting?

    3. What happened to Cindy, whose jealous paranoia was so profound she refuses to let her husband kiss another female lead during a take?

    4. Wasn’t Darrin’s wife also in-line for an Emmy or whatever??

  12. hitorque

    Krankenschaaften: Ed even as a grown-assed man couldn’t read something as simple as a baseball lineup? In the era of three-man pitching rotations, Ed needed a lineup card or someone to tell him when his starting days were??

    And seriously, fuck that bratty assed kid with his 1950s hairstyle… Are we sure he’s real and not a figment of Ed’s imagination?

    I though Ed was from the hardcore old school guy from the era where all adults had an obligation to rebuke obstinate brat (even if it was somebody else’s kids)… So why did Ed tolerate a week of his smartass cutesy cutesy backtalk instead of grabbing the nearest electrical cord he could find and putting that brat over his knee??

  13. Hang on…I thought Crankshaft was illiterate, not that he was incapable of recognizing the very letters themselves. I mean, I’m illiterate in French, but I could still recognize my name if it appeared in a French newspaper.

    Even an illiterate person should be able to recognize his own name. At least I would think so.