The Half-Hour of Reckoning

Link to today’s strip.

Not much to say with this one, except confirmation that Funky is indeed left-handed.  I don’t know if that was established in the strip before…and what difference it would make if it were.  After all, this is a strip that can’t even get one of its main characters’ last name right.

So, Funky’s got a texting app that lets him delete a text with one keystroke?  No confirmation or anything?  I’d actually like that.  Admittedly I’m not a prolific texter but if I think better of sending something, I’ve got backspace over it until everything’s gone.  There’s probably a more efficient way of doing it, but like Tom Batiuk, there are some things about which I really can’t be bothered to research.  See also my lawn, and why you shouldn’t be on it.

And you’d think Funky would use a better epithet than “Shoot!”  That sounds an awful lot like an invitation in Westview; only the fact that it would be interesting keeps it at a figurative level.

“Shoot!” John Darling said to Plantman.

“Blast it all!” Lisa said, arriving at the post office.

“We’re so screwed!” Pete and Darrin yelled as the police broke down the hotel room door.

“What in blue blazes!” Les yelled when he was trapped in an industrial blast furnace.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

20 responses to “The Half-Hour of Reckoning

  1. spacemanspiff85

    What was keeping Holly from typing the text herself, if Funky is so slow at it?
    Also, why did she have to sit there and watch for the “half hour” it took?

    • Jimmy

      Suddenly, Holly is my second-most reviled character in this strip (maybe third, if we include Lisa).

  2. Epicus Doomus

    Yes Tom, stereotypical overwrought-yet-loving mom is having mysterious communication issues with her son and is taking out her frustrations on her fat and hapless husband, who’s too baffled by commonplace technology to notice or care. Very funny stuff right there and a premise that just hasn’t gotten old after being done ten million times before. You’d think it’d be harder to find a fresh take on such timeless subject matter.

    Holly making fun of Funky for being fat is like Stalin making fun of Hitler’s lack of charisma. So after Rocky accepted Cory’s proposal they just stopped eating pizza entirely? Seems kind of implausible to me. Perhaps of he spent a few panels on filling in the blanks instead of relying on tiresome and dated “technology” jokes it’d make more sense but fat f*cking chance that ever happens.

  3. Jimmy

    When you subcontract your work, you have no grounds for complaint.

  4. billytheskink

    Why is Funky’s text of any significant length? Why didn’t Holly step in to type if it was taking a half hour? Why does she care so greatly about them picking a date?

    This set up is so labored it should have a union.

  5. The Dreamer

    time to bring back the enshrined Montoni’s pay phone, which has been banished to the basement next to the abandoned pacman machine

  6. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    It took so long they went from being inside at night to going outside during the day.

  7. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Bathack: “This whole week will be about Funky and Holly trying to send a restricted text message. But since texting is so stooooopid and only dumb kids do it, they will struggle with it and mess it up. Because texting is stoopid.”

    BurchHack: “Wait. This is going to be the entire week? Struggling to text?”

    Bathack: “Hmmff. Isn’t that what I just said?? Did you get that cheap hair dye in your ears?? I really hate texting. I want to show what a waste of time it is.”

    BurchHack: “I get that. But how do you stretch that over a week? How long does it take you to say you don’t like texting?”

    Bathack: “It’s called WRITING! And I am your Lord Of Language. Just kick back and draw your pretty pictures and let me write!”

    BurchHack: “Look, Tom, I’m not going to put my name on dreck like this. I will not draw people struggling with texting for an entire WEEK! This is one of your lamest, dumbest ideas ever.”

    Bathack: “Fine. I’ll have Ayrhead draw it. He knows how to please me. He also draws what I ask him to.”

    BurchHack: “Do what you want, Tom. Look, I’m just gonna grab my stuff. I’ll sleep at my place for a while. We’ll talk about this another time.”

    Bathack: “Fine! Go! Ayrhead is going to stay here with me while we work on this, and you know what they say: Three’s company, but it is also a crowd.”

    BurchHack: “Whatever. I don’t know why I let myself get talked into this. See you around, Tom.” (Slam!)

    Bathack: “Well. I guess some children WERE left behind!”

    • ian'sdrunkenbeard

      “Ayrhead”. Heh, heh, heh.

    • Gerard Plourde

      I am curious to know why Ayers was involved with this week’s arc? Could it be that the Cory/Rocky wedding arc was already planned and drawn but was put aside for the Starbuck Jones rabbit hole?

  8. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “Hallelujah! There’s a half hour we’ll never get back.”
    “Just like our marriage. There’s thirty years we’ll never get back.”
    “What did you just say?”
    “Did I stutter, $%#!*?”

  9. And the worst of it is yet to come. It’s no wonder Funky is all crabbed up and junk….he knows that things are always getting worse.

  10. Rusty Shackleford

    Why is Funky still talking to that blob of pizza dough?

  11. bobanero

    So the theory is there’s been a 10 year time jump, but the reality is that he’s still using jokes from 1997.

  12. Miskatonic Sophomore

    How long, I wonder, until “The Fat Finger” shows up on a mock Batom Comics cover?

    I’m picturing a profoundly depressed 350-pound vigilante in a red-and-white-checked cape. He smells of oregano, and his acute clumsiness makes him a poor hand-to-hand combatant.

  13. hitorque


  14. hitorque

    It’s funny because Montoni’s is open, absolutely everyone in this one-stoplight town eats there daily, yet Holly+Funky can burn an hour sitting in a booth with no tables to wait or pizza pies to cook…