Momenade

Today’s strip is the kind of maudlin slop that TB believes makes his comic strip stand out from the strips that people actually enjoy. Why is Holly telling Funky this now? Was this supposed to run before Funky and Holly left on their ridiculous road trip? Why wasn’t this a week long set of flashback strips instead of one of TB’s unloved trademark walls o’ text? Did Holly’s mom really go to prom with her daughter? Do I really care about any of this?

No.

Edit post script:
I had to write this on a telephone in a car and neglected to thank you all for putting with me for two weeks. Our fearless leader TFH takes the helm tomorrow. Have a safe and happy Labor Day weekend SOSFers.

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27 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

27 responses to “Momenade

  1. spacemanspiff85

    “I felt bad about not going to prom and lying to my mom about it, so to make up for it I’m forcing you to go to prom, with me as your date, even though you don’t want to.”
    Batiuk writing women is possibly the worst Batiuk.

  2. Jimmy

    I’m not well versed in Act I or Act Ii, so my reaction was, “If it’s not Calvin and Hobbes, I’m.not reading this.”

    In other words, I don’t give a shit.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    I love Funky’s “I don’t give a shit” expression!

  4. “My mother cared enough to torch my reputation in order to make up for her own lying stupidity so I feel beholden to her because I’m a woman in a Tom Batiuk comic.”

  5. Gerard Plourde

    So now TomBa has decided to retcon Holly, who as the band’s majorette would have been a sought-after prom date in the 1970’s. And what parent in that era would have attended as her child’s date, ensuring humiliation?

    • Rusty Shackleford

      Right, all of the majorettes from my high school days were totally hot. Those long legs, the…anyways, no way they weren’t getting asked out.

    • erdmann

      A band majorette unable to get a prom date? Sure, why not. After all, this strip is only a quarter inch from reality… give or take 300 or 400 light years.
      Still, there is one part of this flashback that is completely realistic. I can completely believe that Holly’s mom, with her wretched personality and mutant forehead, couldn’t get a date.

    • Hitorque

      +1000…

      Especially since retcon new art teenage Holly is easily as hot as Cindy on her best day…

  6. So, now it’s Holly’s mom who is the band alumnus? I thought it was Holly this whole time and the old lady just insisted on coming along.

    And I’ll be damned if any of this makes any sense whatsoever. No one needs to ask the mom to the reunion; she just has to show up.

    Every time Batiuk talks about writing, I think “How would he know about writing?”

  7. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Ah. So we endured weeks of this buildup, including an excruciating car trip from Bumfudge, Ohio to Death’s Door, Florida and back, all for a coming alumni band alumni reunion that was announced with about two weeks notice. After all that, all we saw of it was Dinkleberry and BeckyBoy yelling into a bullhorn, and TWO slap-nuts hilarious jokes about oxygen tanks.

    You get the idea that BatHack thinks of these story ideas, then tires of them before completing them. How many times now has he had a big, long buildup heading toward something he never showed? He even all but skipped over Goatee Boy and Crayola’s wedding! I guess that’s called “writing.”

    Fat Holeeeeee’s lengthy, wordy, tiresome, depressing explanation aside, that still fails to explain why they needed to DRIVE all that way, rather than simply fly down and get her.

    One of the most pointless storylines in the grand and glorious history of pointless storylines.

  8. DOlz

    Gee no one wanted to ask Holly’s mom to the prom, I wonder why?

  9. Rusty Shackleford

    Oh Mein Gott, did anyone have a happy childhood? Does anyone in this strip grow up and laugh at some of their past misfortunes, realizing that they sometimes took things way more seriously than they should have?

    As I recall the first couple of girls I asked turned me down. So what. Who cares. I am struggling to remember their names now. And yes, I have a great life now and am married to a beautiful woman. High school was such a small part of my life, I can’t see where it affected me good or bad.

    I hope Funky is getting a little side action from Cayla, he needs some fun.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      In Batty’s pointy little bald head, whatever you did in high school sets the stage for the rest of your life, and you have to spend the rest of your life following that path.

  10. DOlz

    Off topic (slightly):

    The Real Reason Why Garfield Isn’t Funny…

    Kind of refreshing to hear a hack admit he’s a hack.

    • Hitorque

      Which is odd because 1980s Garfield was hilarious and my favorite strip as a kid… But even I’ll admit Davis has been coasting the last 15-20 years

  11. Rusty Shackleford

    For those that read a Mary Worth, Ed Crankshaft’s brother is the star of the latest story arc.

  12. Rusty

    Whenever I see a strip like today’s, I think back to the story arc where Les’s professor told him he would never make it as a writer. I have a feeling Kent State was pretty academically rigorous for the likes of Tom.

  13. bayoustu

    White Castle?! Cease and desist!! More like “Pale Fortress”…

  14. I can believe nerdy Lisa not getting invited to prom, but Act I Holly was second only to Cindy “Unicorn Hair” Summers on the Westview teen hottie list. During his car crash induced time travel, even Funky took time to swing by the gazebo to marvel at her “so young and so beautiful” self. Before writing a panel like today’s, Batiuk should really pause and ask himself: “If I have to write about 250 words of exposition, should I maybe spread this narrative out over at least a couple more days?” Today should have been the payoff for the last three weeks of strips, in which we actually get to see the alumni band take the field and, who knows, maybe hilarity could have ensued.

    • Actually “seeing” an event that’s been built up to? That seems to be anathema to Batiuk. I think the last time we saw an event was (of course) Les’ wedding. Everything else has been “this is what’s going to happen/well, that sure happened, didn’t it?”

      • Double Sided Scooby Snack

        He cut away abruptly from Les and Crayola’s wedding, as if he decided not to run something he wrote – Like perhaps a ghostly visit from Dead Lisa.

    • Epicus Doomus

      It seems rather implausible, at best. The guy contrives a way to combine two of his favorite things…old coot humor and marching band gags…and still manages to totally botch the premise. This is one of the most pitiful Sunday strips ever IMO.

  15. Epicus Doomus

    Good lord, another FW character stewing over ancient high school traumas. Her mother was in high school what, maybe sixty-five years ago? BatWad “writes” and thinks about this crap way, way too much. If the “worst night of her life” was not having a prom date in high school she ought to consider herself extremely fortunate.