Simian Simulacrum

Link to Today’s Comic.

Comic Book Harriet back again for another ride on The Carousel of Death (and Comics) known as Funky Winkerbean. And like all carousels we’ve been on a trip up and down, around and around, only to come right back to where we were before.

Mopey Pete and Durren have quit their old jobs, moved halfway across the country, got a new boss, and started an entirely new comics venture, only to write “Starbuck Jones But This Time He’s a Monkey.”

At least Burchett got to draw two panels of exciting detailed comic book action. I especially like the face of the guy getting a haymaker in panel two, and the Abe Sapien/Murloc love child in panel three. For a brief moment, he actually got to be an artist producing art again. Like a rotting tree producing a single delicious apple even though it’s dead inside.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

21 responses to “Simian Simulacrum

  1. Jimmy

    This character looks like a robot to me.

  2. The Nelson Puppet

    “It’s my call and I have to tell you right now that covers with atomic robotic gorillas on them are total locks.”

    -Nobody ever.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    “I see Atomic Ape popping a squat on top of a cheap knockoff of the Mystery Mobile driven by a cheap knockoff mashup of Augie Doggie and Hong Kong Phooey.”

  4. billytheskink

    “Lone Ranger of space”

    Let’s ask the folks at Filmation about how that very concept saved their animation studio.

    What’s that? We can’t ask them anything? They closed down right after they completed one season of space Lone Ranger?

    Carry on, then. The kids in the comic book stores these days don’t know Thirty/Thirty, Tex Hex, or those overused prairie dog people anyways.

    • The Nelson Puppet

      Good Lord, that looks like one of those Robert Smigel SNL cartoons! You have Atomic Cleavon Little in Blazing Saddles there in the middle, and look at the size of the gun brandished by the Atomic Horse! In the lower left corner is the Atomic love child of Snarf and Yosemite Sam, at the far right is the Atomic love child of Patti Scialfa and Billy Jack.

  5. spacemanspiff85

    I like how Pete somehow has all these grand ideas about Atomic Ape even though he just heard of it, and Cindy’s the one who thought it up.
    Also, why is the ape’s costume the same exact color as his skin? And I’m going to be seeing Pete’s bug-eyed disembodied head in the second panel in my nightmares for a while.

    • comicbookharriet

      It’s easy to have ‘grand ideas’ when you’re just recycling the same old ideas over and over and over. Next thing you know, he’ll be pitching books on zombies and gritty fairy tale retellings.

  6. Isn’t this how Batom Comics got shut down in the first place? If I recall correctly, they’d plagiarized Not!Spider-Man and thought they should have been allowed to do so because Mega Comics was soooo big and they were soooo small and also, Batiuk has no idea how things work in Big Kid Town so “a company protecting its own interests when faced with the presumptuousness of idiotic thieves” is a “heartless behemoth that hates people.”

  7. The Nelson Puppet

    I would love a YouTube channel where we could see “Tom Batiuk reacts to seeing an episode of Steven Universe for the first time!” or “Tom Batiuk reacts to reading 2018 Eisner Award winner ‘Spinning,’ by Tillie Walden!”

  8. Gerard Plourde

    Is it intentional that Mindy has morphed into a virtual clone of Darin? Is this how she was able to entice Pete?

  9. hitorque

    1. If Batiuk has this huge of a geek boner for the comics industry and the people who work it, why is he continually selling them short by trivializing the creative process, reducing everything down to a bunch of grown-assed first-graders having a “Wouldn’t it be cool if…” conversation??

    2. Batiuk is a Silver Age Flash fanboi, isn’t he? And who is one of the biggest names in Flash’s rogues gallery? Gorilla Grodd… So all Batiuk did was have a lazy, “What if Grodd was a good guy instead?” –moment, then he told one of his artist buddies to imagine Grodd as a hero and a member of the New Gods, and voila we have “Attommikkkk Apee”. Mark my words, he put less than thirty seconds of thought into this.

    3. Look, I’m not knocking the Golden/Silver Age because it has its place in comics lore, but why does it have to be the be-all-end-all with Batiuk? Why has his knowledge of comics not evolved beyond childhood?? I personally read a sporadic assortment of random comics on and off for a four-year stretch, 84-87… I have not bought a comic since then… And since that point, the bulk of my (casual) comics knowledge comes from animated series and video games in the 90s and 00s. Why does a casual like me feel like such a smug expert compared to someone who eats, drinks and breathes comics like Batiuk??

    • His reacting to the campy sixties Batman and Liechtenstein’s riffing on the genre as if they were crimes against humanity and his ill-natured grousing about how Marvel ruined things by presenting people with real problems and real weaknesses instead of DC’s collection of unbelievable motivation-free ‘heroes’ points us to why the shlockiest and dumbest elements of DC Comics take on the level of a religious orthodoxy. He’s not very bright and he’s kind of defensive about his interests because he fears that his critics are right.

  10. Epicus Doomus

    What the hell is a “sleazy solar system”? Can a bunch of planetary bodies orbiting a central star really be “sleazy”? And why would an “atomic” robotic ape be required to dole out justice in these solar systems? It’s so odd how he creates these outlandish fictional characters then plops them into the most generic premises. You’d think that perhaps an “atomic” ape would be a Godzilla-like character, a misunderstood mutant wreaking havoc on a world that wronged him, but instead he’s just the Lone Ranger in monkey form.

  11. Professor Fate

    A Lone Ranger of Space. So since as the story goes the Lone Ranger was a Texas Ranger who was the lone survivor of an ambush does that mean the Atomic Ape was just an ape before what? His planet was nuked? Was he fighting space crime before this? So many questions.
    And the concept of Sleazy Solar Systems makes my head hurt.