Aaugh!

Link To Today’s Strip

Wow, it’s an EXTREMELY RARE and wildly abrupt mid-week arc shift, as suddenly the seldom-seen Women Of Les make an EXTREMELY RARE guest holiday appearance. Good ol’ Summer hasn’t changed a bit, still slobbing around in her trademark hoodie like it’s 2011 all over again. For those both of you keeping score at home, Summer and Keisha are in their EIGHTH year of college. I don’t know what they’re majoring in but it must be pretty grueling stuff.

Once again, Summer left for college eight years ago so Les needs to get the f*ck over it already. Don’t they have DVRs in Ohio? Les is one of the few FW characters who’s annoying even when the other characters are just talking about him. What a dick.

27 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

27 responses to “Aaugh!

  1. You know what’s a really bad way to sell your product? Referencing a superior product–in this case, “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” which is a greater achievement than anything Tom Batiuk has ever managed.

    A remember a strip from years ago where Summer and Les repeated the dialogue from ACBC. Guess what–just made Funky Winkerbean poorer by comparison.

    • Epicus Doomus

      I believe you’re forgetting the little-remembered “Peanuts”-FW crossover where Charlie Brown hung himself and Linus came out without really specifically saying so. And who could forget Pig-Pen reminiscing about how dirty he used to be? Or Snoopy retconning his Sopwith Camel into a cardboard cutout?

      • Double Sided Scooby Snack

        Did Peppermint Patty challenge Summer the Specialest Snowflake to a game of driveway hoops? Then have a Very Special Heart-To-Heart with Summer and Karmeesha? Yeah, I think I remember that.

    • Banana Jr. 6000

      Mouthing along with a children’s TV special, and making sure somebody else sees and reports it, is exactly the sort of thing Les Moore would do when he wants attention from someone. Even though we see Les all the time, and he never shows any concern for anything that’s not Dead Lisa or himself.

      This isn’t cute or sweet. It’s ugly, manipulative, and pathetic. And dragging the noble Charlie Brown into it is a crime against the comics page.

      • Charles

        It’s all performative with him. Notice how Les isn’t present here with his daughter who he loves so much. He just wants us all to know that he loves her so much.

        What’s also deranged about this is how it doesn’t appear that Les and Summer’s relationship has progressed at all since she was six years old. She’s an adult now and can presumably have an adult relationship with her father, but instead he insists on infantilizing her. The thing he misses about her is watching a Christmas cartoon together. There’s nothing about “the young woman she’s become” that he actually cares about.

  2. William Thompson

    Parroting a feel-good cartoon? Pollyanna’s crackers!

  3. billytheskink

    Keisha, nobody missed you…

  4. William Thompson

    Caucayla makes it sound like she witnessed this personally. Was she around when Summer was a child, or did Summer and Creepy Les keep this up while Summer was in high school?

    • There was a Sunday strip a few years ago, when Summer was in high school, where the two of them watched the show while reciting the dialogue. It’s every bit as cringe-worthy and tin-eared as you can imagine.

  5. spacemanspiff85

    “Les doesn’t give one crap about you, Summer’s Black Girlfriend Who Stands Around Silently. Wait, you’re my daughter? Huh.”

  6. Doghouse Reilly

    By week’s end Les will be seen wandering the aisles of Westview High in a yellow t-shirt with a jagged black stripe, when his second, not-dead-LIsa wife decides to cheer him up by getting the school to let him direct the annual holiday pageant, with music provided by Becky’s (DInkle’s) band. Meanwhile, Funky will set up the worst Christmas tree ever at Montoni’s, and Mopey Pete will find inspiration for Atomix Comics scripts will lying on top of a doghouse.

  7. Paul Jones

    He’s channelling someone else: Lynn Johnston. Reason: it’s Summer’s “fault” he has no idea what to do with her.

  8. erdmann

    The Charlie Brown Christmas special? Can’t they just say “A Charlie Brown Christmas?” Are they afraid of trademark infringement or something?

    On the other hand, thumbs up for the inclusion of Charlie Brown’s tree on the mantle. That’s actually a nice touch.

    • William Thompson

      The Peanuts tree was already decorated and had some green in it. That’s more effort than Batiuk put into the Moorlock’s Xmas tree.

  9. Gerard Plourde

    On display, a few issues prompted by dropping Summer into this slapdash Christmas tie-in –

    Summer attends Kent State, If he misses her so much, why hasn’t he driven the half hour to have lunch with her occasionally? (Doesn’t he, like TomBa, do book signings there?)

    Doesn’t Summer come home when the dorms close at the end of the school year? Does she live off campus? If so, is Les paying the rent since she doesn’t work?

    Why is it taking her eight years to graduate? Is she trying to beat Zonker Harris’s record that he set trying to avoid graduating from Walden University?

    Is Keisha also taking eight years to graduate? If so, why didn’t this come up when Les was complaining about Summer’s procrastination?

    • Charles

      He really doesn’t care about that generation at all, so when he can conveniently stash them “at college” that’s where they stay until he comes up with something for them to do. But since he doesn’t care about them, they haven’t had anything to do in seven years, hence why they linger in college years after they should have graduated.

      Notice how this strip really isn’t about Summer despite her presence in it. It’s about Les. It doesn’t care how she feels about her father behaving in this manner. It’s just trying to show Les as someone of uncommon emotional depth.

      Anyway, Batiuk cares even less about Keisha than he does about Summer, so that’s why we don’t have the slightest idea what’s going on with her and haven’t since she left high school.

      I mean, Christ, he shows more interest in Melinda and Mort than he does in these two. Melinda’s had more character development in the last year and a half than Summer’s had in seven years.

  10. sgtsaunders

    Leave it to Les and Summer to ruin A Charlie Brown Christmas for everyone else in the room. On-brand rating: A+!

  11. William Thompson

    Keisha has become such a non-character that she now wears the Standard Issue Black Hair Style (female version). Way to make your characters distinguishable, Bathack!

  12. erdmann

    Shouldn’t Les burst into flame when he recites Luke 2? Or is he able to get around that by saying it backwards?

  13. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Next: Young Lad Summer and his/her/their/its gal pal Karneeshia return to Taj MOORE Hal and occupy the spare bedroom. Where have they been the past umpteen years since entering K*nt State? Are they STILL in school? Did they drop out? Are they married now? Do they drive a Subaru? Haw, Batty has no idea, so you don’t need to know either, Buster. Quite frankly, you ask too many questions. Just kick back and appreciate what The Master condescends to offer you. It’s called “writing.”

    Anywayzzz, it doesn’t matter where they’ve been, or how many college degrees they’ve amassed. Funkwad will hire them BOTH as managers of something-or-other over at You-Know-Where. Their sauce-stained aprons are already waiting for them. Clearly, K*nt State is a farm club for Montoni’s. (School motto: “98% of our graduates receive offers from multiple Ohio pizza joints!”)

    Tune in next week, as Les asks his Young Lad, “Hey kiddo, why’s that tractor trailer pulling up here at Taj MOORE Hal?”

    “Oh, they’re delivering all my hoodies.”

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      YaY! One prick cheese was triggered by the horrible, nasty THING I wrote.

      Love it!

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Fine day we’re having!
      Usually enjoy a good laugh.
      Care to enjoy some fun?
      Kidding around is so hard for some.

      Only you may be offended!
      For me, it’s just…
      Fun!

      Surely much is said in jest,
      Now, and in the past.
      Over the years,
      We have become acquainted.
      Forgive me if I
      Laugh
      At those who take things seriously.
      Kiss and make up.
      Everything will be
      Swell.

      😽

  14. The Dreamer

    This could be a setup for a storyline where Summer has finally graduated, and her WNBA career was cut short when she blew out her bad knee again. So she’s moving home again to take over as Westview girls basketball coac and replace Linda Bushka as math teacher

    • Gerard Plourde

      You’ve posited a really good storyline, proving that you’ve spent at least five minutes longer thinking about these characters than The Author has.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Could be. But knowing BatWoke, and how cool and “with it” he’s been trying to be lately, it’s more likely Young Lad Summer and [insert non-triggering possessive pronoun here] gal pal Karamaleeshia will become lawfully wedded lesbians. Surely Battoid qualifies for some kind of award by showing a ghey wedding.

      But as luck would have it, we learn Summer, in fact, has a penis. This comes as a surprise to Batty, Karmaneesha, AND the award committee! All are in tears…….. as the curtain falls on Act III.