A Major Bummer

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If “A” is for “asshole”, definitely. Are they aware that they’re not absolutely required to employ Dinkle and can fire him whenever they like? I believe Ohio is a “right to fire cackling assholes” state, too, unlike mine where you pretty much HAVE to be one to climb the ol’ coporate ladder. The church ladies are way too passive about it, they’re not a captive crowd like his old marching band students were, so why are they tolerating it? I think if they team up they could take him and quite frankly I’d be totally willing to help them if only I could.

But anyway yeah, Dinkle is an obnoxious taskmaster who loves to torture his charges and so forth. I have to assume this, as we never actually saw Dinkle doing much of anything, but church ladies never lie so therefore it must be true. If this is the end of the big St. Spires mini-mega arc it ended in classic FW style, with a “climax” that has all the impact of a damp tissue landing in a bathroom wastebasket. What a tedious ordeal, I mean Lord knows I’ve covered my fair share of really plodding, worthless FW arcs but man, this premise was feeble even by FW standards. Please let it be over.

11 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

11 responses to “A Major Bummer

  1. William Thompson

    Is this the first time any of Batiuk’s characters have been accused of having a personality?

  2. Epicus Doomus

    “St. Spires was looking to replace their retiring church organ player, so they placed an ad in the newspaper. Harry saw the ad and applied for the job. They hired him on the spot, then asked if he had any music directing experience. Then he had the choir practice until well after midnight on a weeknight. The ladies in the choir were exhausted and upset.”

    When you spell it all out like that the overall shittiness of the story really shines through. If you want to get technical about it it’s not really a “story” at all, it’s just a disjointed sequence of events where the subject of the story sort of randomly varies each day. And that’s not really the way you’re supposed to, you know, do it.

    • Banana Jr. 6000

      This is all just character shilling for Dinkle. Dinkle’s so musical! Dinkle’s so talented! He just has to roll his eyes to get a job! Dinkle’s so hilariously overhearing! Combined with the previous week’s “Les talks about Dead Lisa some more at yet another book signing” arc, we’re up to a solid month of self-indulence. And since I see Batton Thomas in the header, that streak will not end soon.

      • Sourbelly

        I’m sure “overhearing” is just a typo, but it really fits, considering Harry hears so well for a deaf person.

  3. RudimentaryLathe?

    As a musician, I’ll admit the P1-to-P2 punchline is kinda funny. But P3 drags it out too much (like this whole storyline.)
    And like I and others have stated, there is NO WAY old church ladies would just bow to this kind of treatment.
    ….AND I see Nameless Blond Woman looks like Mopey Pete in a wig again. I don’t even have a snark for that it’s just really annoying.

  4. Gerard Plourde

    I wonder where this arc is going. Does the kvetching by the choir members portend a reprise of the “Bedside Manor Band” scenario where Dinkle brilliantly molds an over the hill bunch into a formidable unit performing on a professional level? It would certainly fit in with Act III’s habit of engaging in fantasy wish-fulfillment. Maybe TomBa will arrange it so that they and the Bedside Manor Band get hired to do the soundtrack for “Lisa’s Story: The Apotheosis”.

    • Mr. A

      I think it would be interesting if these women pushed back against Dinkle, and then Dinkle—for the first time in his life—admitted he was being unreasonable and backed down. Y’know, character growth?

      …I can dream, can’t I?

      • Mela

        Or at the very least have one or two of them fall asleep in the pew and snore so loudly that it covers up the volume of the singers. That might clue him in.

  5. louder

    I find it interesting that BatHack has a comic about the miseries of church life running through Holy Week… just saying what a miserable portrait of church life is being portrayed during its holiest time. But I don’t think BatHack has that kind of awareness.

  6. Banana Jr. 6000

    Is this punchline supposed to be a reference to the song “I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General”? It sure would fit Batiuk’s idea of what Dinkle is. And by extension, Batiuk’s idea of what he thinks he himself is:

    I am the very model of a Funky act three character,
    I take up space for weeks on end and never face competitors,
    I have a job at which I keep old ladies up ’til 2 a.m.,
    But when it comes to self-aware, I haven’t got a microgram!

  7. Hitorque

    How many more days before the Big Dink turns St. Spires into his own cult?

    “THERE IS NO OTHER GOD BUT DINKLE, AND THAT STUPID ONE-ARM GIRL IS HIS MESSENGER”