Pity Me, I Read You

Link to today’s strip.

And I’m pretty sure this is another witticism that occurred to Tom Batiuk, and he thought, Yep, there’s one for the strip. I think I’ll make it a Sunday one.

I suppose it’s kind of funny, though if someone said that to me I’d probably smile in a kind of “It’s not worth arguing over” way. It also seems like it would be spoken by someone who would insist on knowing that you found it hilarious, by repeating it and going “Huh? Huh? Pretty good, eh?”

The art is okay, and the consistency with Harry’s hands is nice, but why did we have to have Lillian and her “friend” shoved into this? Yuck. Please leave the Crankshafters in the Crankshaft Universe.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

41 responses to “Pity Me, I Read You

  1. William Thompson

    Sure, I just have to believe Crazy has never heard that song until now, and doesn’t realize it came out a generation before “The Empire Strikes Back,” and can’t figure out that when you hear the lyrics being sung they make a syncopated kind of sense. Okay, he’s that kind of idiot, but that’s pitiful, not amusing.

  2. Epicus Doomus

    “Star Wars”. Sinatra. In a way this actually represents a little progress, as usually the ancient pop-culture references are way, way more obscure than that. I mean FW once did an arc about Dashiell Hammett, for crying out loud. But most people have actually heard of Yoda and Ol’ Blue-Eyes. So there’s that.

    Seeing Act III Crazy Harry always bums me out, as it just draws attention to how far his star has fallen over the years. Believe it or not, Crazy used to be a major FW player, right behind Les and way ahead of Funky, who was really more of a “straight man” (in the comedic sense, you pervert) used for those deadpan reaction shots that catapulted FW to mild fleeting semi-popularity. Air guitar battles, playing pizzas on his turntable, hanging out in his secret luxury suite locker, he was the (wink-wink) “spacey” one, unfathomably “cool”, seemingly always in total control.

    Then he became a mailman, but BatHam being BatHam and all he had to take even that away from ol’ Harry, until he became the sad peripheral weirdo character he remains to this day. If he disappeared from the strip entirely it’s doubtful than anyone but us would even notice and even then it’d take years and years until one of us finally took note. Like with his kids, who disappeared years ago.

    • Charles

      Seeing Act III Crazy Harry always bums me out, as it just draws attention to how far his star has fallen over the years.

      Yep, most of his appearances these days are one-off Sunday strips where he’s complaining about something. Or he’s the wall that Funky bounces his own tales of woe off of. Was his only focal appearance this past year where he bought salad dressing for his wife on their anniversary?

  3. billytheskink

    Pizza and coffee together?

    Looks to me like Yoda, or someone not human, wrote this strip.

  4. Pizza and coffee together?

    One could always make the argument that maybe Crazy just likes drinking his soda (what do they call it in Ohio? Pop?) out of that mug; it didn’t necessarily have to be coffee. But you see Funky filling it with coffee, hot coffee in panel 4, and in the next panel Crazy’s swigging from the mug with a slice in the other hand, WHO DRINKS HOT COFFEE WITH THEIR PIZZA?!?‽ Not Mr. Sinatra, that’s for sure. Also, Frank would never hold a slice of pizza that way!

    • JPuzzleWhiz

      I can’t picture Frank Sinatra ever having anything at all to do with pizza, much less hold a slice of it.

    • ComicBookHarriet

      No one on Earth would hold a slice of pizza that way, unless they were looking forward to all the grease from the cheese oozing sideways onto their palm.

      • Mr. A

        I think he’s folding the slice lengthwise, but the colorist got confused and colored the underside of the slice to look like cheese.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      What, your local pizza shop doesn’t also feature a coffee counter?

      Another cheap and poorly thought out Batty gimmick. He needed a stage for his characters but also wanted to butt kiss Luigi’s, the result is a pizza shop with a coffee counter.

      #quarterinchfromreality. #lessucks

  5. Rusty Shackleford

    What the hell is this? Well at least it is not a stupid comic book cover.

    • JPuzzleWhiz

      Yeah, that’s what I totally expected after a week of comic book-related shit.

      • Rusty Shackleford

        Check out today’s Crankshaft for epic laziness and an ignorance of the laws of physics.

        • Gerard Plourde

          And what the heck is he supposed to be doing? Are those supposed to be trash bags filled with fertilizer that the water percolates through before it irrigates the plants?

  6. ;ouder

    Hey! If I’m having pizza for breakfast, you’re darn tootin’ I’m having a hot cup of java with it, dadio!

  7. J.J. O'Malley

    Nice work on the liver spots on the selector’s hand in panel three.

    Confession Time: I live in southeastern Pennsylvania, and when I’m on my way to a flea market, ball game, or just a road trip on a Sunday one of my small joys is getting to listen to Sid Mark spin Sinatra songs on a local AM station that the rest of the week is dedicated to troglodytic right-wing rantings. Sid’s been playing Frank on the radio since before I was born, and it’s always nice to associate Sundays with Sinatra. Leave it to Battyuk to ruin that for me.

  8. Epicus Doomus

    I didn’t even notice the coffee/pizza thing, just like how I didn’t notice it last time. But yeah, that’s just revolting beyond words. Understand, the Garden State is AWASH in pizza. I have never lived anywhere that wasn’t within walking distance of at least three pizzerias and I can safely say that I’ve never seen anyone wash down a couple slices with coffee, ever. That’s like peas and ice cream or oysters and strawberry jam, it’s downright unnatural.

  9. Sourbelly

    To paraphrase the Schmenge Brothers, “Pizza and coffee, mmm-mmm-good!”

  10. Mr. A

    Look, Crazy Harry doesn’t get many chances to live up to his name anymore. If he wants to eat pizza with coffee, I’m all for it.

    The joke is harmless, and the artwork is pleasant enough.

    What I want to know is, why is Sinatra singing about Chicago in the first place? New York wasn’t enough for him? Leave some meat on the bone for the other crooners!

    • J.J. O'Malley

      The Jimmy Van Heusen/Sammy Kahn tune was written for the 1964 Rat Pack musical/comedy “Robin and the 7 Hoods,” which set the Robin Hood saga in 1920s Chicago gangland.

      At least Frank let Tony Bennett have San Francisco.

      • ComicBookHarriet

        I thought I recognized that song. Not that I’ve ever seen Robin and the 7 Hoods. But I have watched these two Australians eviscerate it in hilarious style.

    • hitorque

      He let Sammy Davis Jr have Detroit…

    • Sinatra sang a lot of songs about various cities, he even had an earlier one about Chicago (That Todd’lin Town). What I’d like to know is, why does Montoni’s have a song about Chicago on the jukebox? Shouldn’t they all be about Ohio?

  11. Banana Jr. 6000

    The Black Keys? What’s a song from this millennium doing in Funky Winkerbean?

    (goes to Wikipeda)

    “The Black Keys are an American rock band formed in Akron, Ohio”

    Oh. Right. Of course. The sucking up just never ends with this guy.

    • Epicus Doomus

      Excellent catch. I thought that was sort of odd but now it makes perfect sense. Perhaps they’re fans of the strip…lol.

    • Mr. A

      He name-dropped a 2005 song from a Philadelphia band2005—”So What If We’re Outta Tune (w/ The Rest of the World)” by Marah—in the middle of last year’s “Wally installs a wheelchair ramp” mini-arc. Link to post

    • Rusty Shackleford

      Yeah I noticed that, he always slips stuff like that in when he shows that stupid jukebox. Another gimmick…

      Dan Auerbach is getting calls from his friends telling him they saw his band mentioned in a newspaper comic…wow…!,,

      • Banana Jr. 6000

        Just for today’s comedy masterpiece of a strip, he had to appropriate Frank Sinatra, Yoda, Star Wars, Carole King, The Black Keys, “My Kind of Town,” two Crankshaft characters, and three Montoni’s logos. And he does this all the time, especially in John Darling. So often the punchline is just a drawing of a celebrity, who I’m sure didn’t consent to appearing in the strip. Like a TV news show about illegal aliens, and the interviewees are Chewbacca, Mr. Spock, and E.T. That’s the whole joke. Batiuk is constantly using other people’s copyrighted work as a crutch. For crying out loud, DC Comics, sue somebody!

  12. Pat Astin Martin

    This piece of unfunny shit must have been inspired by the sixth glass of cheap whiskey, three nights of insomnia, and a mini stroke.

  13. Hitorque

    1. No soul at all in that Jukebox… Can’t say I’m surprised though.

    2. Even then, that song seems a very odd selection for a Cleveland area pizza joint.

    3. Like most Sunday strips, the punchline is adequate, but the setup was way too long…

    4. I know it’s an Ohio thing, but seeing people scarf down their bottomless mugs of hot black coffee while stuffing their faces with cheap pizza in summertime will never not irk the hell out of me…

    • Gerard Plourde

      You mean people in Ohio really do regularly drink coffee with pizza? That’s bizarre.

  14. The Duck of Death

    Batiuk is fond of repudiating his critics by asking them, “How many successful syndicated comic strips have YOU created?” So I’ll ask Batiuk: How many Oscars have you been nominated for? Sammy Cahn, the lyricist for “My Kind of Town (Chicago Is),” was nominated for 27, and won four. How many albums called “The Songs of Tom Batiuk” did Sinatra do? He did one for Cahn’s songs. How many popular standards did you write, Tom? None? Then by your own rules: Shut up.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      Batty is like the tenured college professor that got lazy and just teaches from the same notes year after year.

      It’s not like the syndicates are actively shopping around for new talent, so there is no competition. He’s got tenure for life, and it shows.

  15. bigd1992

    Who wrote this strip, Jar Jar Binks?

  16. Perfect Tommy

    My kind of salad dressing…….
    Italian is……..