Category: Son of Stuck Funky

Jarr Jarr!

Meesa grateful!
Meesa grateful!

In today’s strip, Mason “Hollywood” Jarr thanks St. Les the Righteous Smirker for some as-yet unspecified “help.” Les’s speech balloon in panel 3 is too small to contain the text I expected: “Mason Jarr, the movie actor who was meant to portray me, Les Moore, whose one true wife died of cancer, but then couldn’t, because kill fee, and took the job of portraying Starbuck Jones in the coming Starbuck Jones film adaptation, in which Mason Jarr appears.”

Back in panel 1, with its rakish split-screen motif, Mason’s poolside phone chat illustrates why California is so much better than Ohio. Mason’s illustrator, however, has failed to pick up on recent trends in portraying action heroes. Here I’m thinking of Chris Pratt’s transformation from amiable schlub to rock-hard stud. Mason, in contrast, looks positively couchey-potatoey, gooey-wooey.

All I would have to do to become an action star is move a mere ¼ inch from reality, without logging any gym time, if this awesome guy is any proof.

Tree at Last, Tree at Last

Westviewians’ “every silver lining has a cloud” mentality takes no holiday. Just as the summertime county fair comes with “an undercurrent of melancholy“, Christmas – Christmas, the Most Wonderful Time of the Year – ebbs away too soon. I guess that’s why Les and Cayla are taking down the Taj Moore-hal tree a little early this year (last year they left it up almost four weeks after Christmas). Of course, those greedy amoral morons who run the department stores manage to milk Christmas profits year round.

Snarkers, it’s been a pleasure as always bringing the FW commentary to you these last few weeks. Tune in tomorrow as Mr. Oddnoc steps up to the plate! Swinging a chainsaw!

Fear of Music

First “Bullying Played for Laffs” strip of the new year! How miserable is life for Cody and Owen, within and without the walls of Westview High School? It’s so bad that the mere approach of three dudes in WHS varsity jackets instantly induces panic in the (Senior!) boys. In panel 2 it’s revealed that the three are not bully jocks but baritones, who, unlike Cody and Owen, are secure enough in their manliness to proudly display their affiliation to the WHS music program.