Son of Stuck Funky – Page 663 – Son of Stuck Funky

Funky New Year

What a year 2014 has been in the Funkiverse. Les’ dream of bringing Lisa’s Story to filmic life culminated with him walking away from the project (while keeping the money). Jessica abandoned her aspirations of being a documentary filmmaker before even releasing her first film. Bull was teased with the prospect of a college coaching job which, by the time he decided to accept the offer, was yanked away. At least Holly achieved her goal (in the most preposterous fashion) of completing her son’s collection of Starbuck Jones comics.

Meanwhile our titular character has struggled in vain to improve his health, seen his ex-network anchor ex-wife move back to town, presided over the last remaining location of a once-successful pizza chain, and sought to connect with his distant soldier son and declining elderly father. Little wonder that he and his wife opt once again for a quiet, boring New Year’s Eve at home.

Hoping that your plans, dear reader, include a safe and happy celebration, and the best of everything in the coming new year!

If Youth Only Knew, If Age Only Could

Les is kidding himself comparing Cory’s physical prowess to his and Funky’s youthful own. And Batiuk’s kidding himself if he thinks it’s enough to take a phrase, replace one word with its opposite, and offer that as a punchline. It’s the third time he’s done it in the last couple weeks.

No Gain, All Pain

Paul Jones
December 27, 2014 at 1:39 am
Great. Not only is he a glutton who uses regionalisms like sitting on my mind, he’s turning into Ed Crankshaft.

Take away the ballcap and glasses and yes, you do begin to see a bit of a resemblance. Of course, thanks to the time gap ‘twixt Centerville and Westview, no one would mistake the old-beyond-his-years Funkman for the now-decrepit Ed Crankshaft.

With a new year starting in a couple of days, the Funkman carries on his Sisyphean struggles versus his weight. Yesterday we saw him buying new running shoes, and today he puts the bathroom scale through a punishing test.

Numbers Games

The whole cashier asking for your phone number thing has vexed such great minds as Cosmo Kramer. Batiuk comes thisclose to a successful gag, but typically takes it too far. Today’s strip would’ve worked just fine as a daily; padding it out to Sunday length meant tacking on the cashier’s snide reaction, as well as Funky’s meek compliance.

Turkey Meltdown

“Sitting on my mind” is a rather odd turn of phrase, and it’s a rather odd perspective in panel 1 that makes it appear that Cory’s face is smooshed into Funky’s backside. Today’s strip gives the answer to those of us puzzled by how a middle aged man who jogs regularly and goes to the gym manages to maintain the physique of a couch potato. He’s beaten booze, only to replace that addiction with one to food: he eyeballs that leftover turkey the same way he contemplated that leftover bottle of bubbly a few New Year’s Eves ago: