So What If It Never Happens?

So seemingly out of the blue, documentarianne Jessica informs her husband that she’s getting back to work on her long-delayed project about her dad you-know-who…as she packs up her camera and heads out the door. Darin asks her a perfectly legitimate, if clumsily phrased, question: do you really want to do this? And it turns out that she does not, since it requires her to revisit a difficult time in her life (which, having been a baby at the time, she couldn’t possibly remember).

Before the Sun Burns Out

For those of you who are new to the Funkiverse: Jessica must always follow the words “my Dad” with “John Darling.” And for those of you who understandably are unable to recall where she left off with her documentary…well, the last time she even mentioned it was almost a year ago…

…right before she got sidetracked and derailed by the return of Darin’s “bio-dad” Frankie, and, after that, giving birth to a son. Now armed with her trusty old VHS camcorder (and her copy of Les’ first book) our Jess is set to re-re-resume her quest. There’s a surprising note of self-deprecation in panel 3, and I wonder if it comes from Jessica or from her creator: remember she’s been telling everybody about this supposed documentary since she and Darin popped up three years ago

A Streetcar Named Starbuck Jones

Beloved snarkers! I’ve wrested control once again of the good ship SoSF to kick off the gala 4th Anniversary Celebration! My most sincere thanks to DavidO, Beckoning Chasm, Epicus Doomus, and Oddnoc for taking their respective turns in the barrel and helping me bring you daily snark on the cultural blight institution that is Fvnkivs Winkerbeanvs. And special thanks to you, reader, for coming along on this painful and frustrating journey!

As is the case with all Sunday FW strips, today’s strip was not available for preview. But I’m going to go waaayyyy out on a limb here and predict that you’ll have to turn your computer sideways to view it: the Starbucks Jones cover that we glimpsed on Friday. Snark away!

Updated: Yup, called it.

Let Me Axe You Something

Today’s strip show’s Tom B’s uncanny ability to turn the human head into a hatchet as Holly can scarcely believe her luck at getting yet *another* rare Starbucks Jones comic for next to nothing.

Considering the last guy charged her a buck, I guess this deal is even sweeter. What’s next? Will someone pony up the money to cover her gas money for the drive out to pick up the comic?

Once again, TomBat tries to push us into a corner by making us feel like if we’re criticizing these comics, we’re being critical of our brave men and women in the armed forces. But this nonsense is so far removed from reality that Cory might as well be fighting in the Unicorn Wars.