Son of Stuck Funky – Page 762 – Son of Stuck Funky

Heming-No-way

Tape to any punching bag.Reprint as needed. Link to today’s strip

Well, looks like we’ve abandoned the idea of “punchlines” after just a couple of tries, and we’re back to what Les does better than anyone: drink in unearned praise and be a smug ass in response. Today’s strip is just Moore proof, if any were needed, that this is Tom Batiuk’s fantasy Comic Con panel. Look, if you dare, upon that mug in the last panel. He’s looking right at you, dear reader, and issuing an invitation for you to praise him. While he waits, I’m sure you can think of another, more appropriate word that also begins with “p” that you’d like to bestow upon him.

We also learn that Les Moore, literature teacher, has actually read two works of literature: Moby Dick (referred to many times) and “The Snows of Kilimanjaro” (also referred to during last year’s Kilimanjaro arc). I’m sure his students get a blistering education by studying those two works, over and over and over again. And it means Les never has to update his syllabus. Win-win, amirite?

Personally, when I think of Les Moore comparing himself to Ernest (or for that matter, Mariel) Hemingway, I’m reminded of Woody Allen’s “The Lost Generation” — “Hemingway punched me in the mouth.” I think watching anyone punch Les in the mouth would be a treat, even if it was Woody (or for that matter, Irwin) Allen so you knew it wouldn’t hurt much.

I’m sure hoping that next week will find as at a different location. The decor of Montoni’s is damn ugly. The bricks are okay, as is the tiled sidewalk, but the canopy and tablecloth are as tasteless as the pizza. The place should be called Pizza Clown, or Kindergarten Pizzeria, or Paint-Store Explosion Pizza – “If you can eat here, you must be color blind!” What’s inexplicable is how lovingly it’s rendered here. If this strip was black-and-white, it wouldn’t hurt my eyes as much as it does now.

Failure is the Only Option

Link to today’s strip

Ah, there’s the Tom Batiuk that I know of old–a completely nonsensical final crack in panel three. I know the saying, (Be nice to the people you meet on your way to the top, for you’ll meet them again when you fall from grace), but Funky’s use of it here makes no sense to me. Just like “continu[ing] to take” a “permanent break” makes no sense.

I mean, is Funky insulted that Les has to quit his part-time pizza job? “Oh, so now that you’re a writer, you can’t do man’s work like shoveling pizza at people. Well, good luck, wuss. Just remember that when you’re a broken, dying failure desperately in need of a job here–because I sure will.”

I guess Funky is simply emphasizing the worldview in Westview, that you’ll never achieve success and happiness in the outside world, but die lonely and in pain, even if you’re Les Moore. In which case, why didn’t he just say that and spare us all this befuddlement?

Also, fellow snarkers, I’m sure you’ve figured out the whole point of this arc…let’s see, Les sits at a table, while people talk about his abilities and achievements and his total awesomeness and he talks about how hard he works. Yes, folks, it’s how Tom Batiuk thought his Comic Con 2013 experience should play out. And they say there’s no room for fantasy in today’s world!

Forever Lunch

Link to today’s strip

And Tom Batiuk continues to attempt punchlines, with a little less success this time around. And Funky, it’s a teleplay, not a movie script. A minor but annoying distinction.

In panel one, we get yet another example of dialogue that a human would never utter. And maybe I’m mis-remembering, but I thought Les finished his teleplay? Or did he give himself a little “home run” just for writing a scene? Does he do that often? “Yay, Les! You’ve gotten out of bed, give yourself a hand! Way to eat that breakfast, Les Moore! You’re a champ!”

I know what you’re thinking–it’s another superpower–you’re thinking, “Well, that was only the first draft of the script. Naturally it has to be polished and re-written.” Oh, so now you want me to believe that everything that flows from Les’ pen is less than the golden oratory of the gods? Ha, got you on that one!

Finally, I’m not sure I get Cayla’s “joke.” Is she saying that Les is only around at lunchtime? Isn’t that the opposite of what Funky just asked?

Or does it mean she plans to murder Les and then devour his remains? Because I think I’d like to see that plot arc, myself.

Maybe the real Les was replaced by kind of Les-like vegetable that grows in Cayla’s garden, and she’s stewed or baked him into dozens of meals. And of course a new Les just grows in the garden the next day, like a kind of weed or fungus that just can’t be rooted out.

Grease Is The Word

Link to today’s strip

Here at the Funky Winkerbean Game Preserve, most of our animals are old and/or dead, so I want you to know how privileged you are–today, you’re seeing an actual humorous punchline, an animal we thought had died out long ago. What you’re seeing today is a story you’ll be able to tell your grandchildren! If you have grandchildren, that is, and they’ve been bad.

So yeah, props to Tom Batiuk for an actual funny joke. Since most of the “self-depreciating” humor around here tends to be of the “no one understands my genius” type, stuff like this–stuff that actually acknowledges that Montoni’s specializes in the inedible–is a welcome relief. I didn’t find myself laughing, certainly not smirking to beat the band the way Cayla is, but this is still an encouraging development. But who wants to bet it’ll be the last “funny punchline” for several weeks? I think it’s kind of a strain on Tom Batiuk’s abilities to do more than one each Moon cycle.

And can we please see a location other than Montoni’s? A fellow member of the Legion of Snarker Heroes pointed out that we’ve been at this damned place for over a month. How about something less gloomy and depressing, like a cancer ward?

Also, I think Funky is telling a teensie, weensie little fib there–from his appearance, I imagine he eats nothing but slabs of greasy lard, unless there’s something made of sugary paste he can use as a substitute.

And really, whoever chose the decor–specifically that tablecloth–I hope Funky at least gave him a ride back to the asylum.

Sunday, July 21

Link to today’s strip

ABOVE THE POST UPDATE

Something witty and insightful actually related to today’s strip, to be published after the strip goes live.

–or it could just be Cody, Owen, and Dead Heart John talking about crap that no one, and I mean no one, cares about.

ORIGINAL POST

Since, even with my newly-acquired superpowers, my vision cannot see through Saturday, I thought I’d muse a bit on the 50th anniversary arc we’ve just been through (and may continue on into) while waiting for Sunday to show up.

Firstly and most obviously, there weren’t any jokes. Not even the most charitable teacher, grading on the biggest curve, could find anything that anyone outside of Tom Batiuk’s house could call “humor.” That’s so obvious it hardly needs stating, but there is a question: why is this?

Before we start in on personal attacks (on Tom Batiuk; you can attack me all you want, I’ve got superpowers, nyah!), I’d like to change the question: could this have been funny?

Surprisingly, the answer is yes. Not hilarious, not entertaining even, but I could see the humor if, and only if, certain things had been established. That would have required some ground work prior to the arc, of course, which wasn’t there, but let’s change things just a bit…

First of all, forget how hate-able all the characters are. Now, imagine that instead of Harry Dinkle doing these things, it was Jack Benny.

Many of you may not know who Jack Benny was (though I am older than the stars, I never heard his radio show) but his “comic persona” was that of an determined cheapskate. An affable, amiable, even helpful cheapskate, but a man who parted with a penny only after all other alternatives were exhausted.

Everyone on his radio show was aware of this, and acknowledged it openly. In this context, the idea of Benny taking his long-time girlfriend to an inexpensive anniversary party at the cheap dump they go to every week becomes kind of funny. The girlfriend would be appalled yet not want to say anything, the gathered friends would be feeling the same, and when he said he wanted her to “put out,” he’d open up his wallet for her to contribute.

The height of hilarity? Of course not. But I can see the humor.

The problem, of course, is that Funky Winkerbean‘s Harry is not presented as a cheap miser. He’s presented as a beloved father-figure; the very idea of an anniversary party at Montoni’s is not discouraged, but lauded as magnanimous. Harry’s persona is entirely wrong for this kind of story. Had he been presented as he’s perceived by readers–cheap, selfish and egotistical–than this whole arc would have some potential. Viz:

Just as not funny as regular, but at least with a punchline.

I’ll be first to admit the above isn’t funny. But it does have an actual punchline that makes sense in context of Harry’s character.

It’s a pity in a way, because if Tom Batiuk had taken the time to establish (or acknowledge) some negative traits for his characters, the overall level of humor…well, let’s not go overboard. Let me say that it least it wouldn’t be below sea-level.

As another example, take Les Moore. Please. (Ha ha…ha?) If he were presented as a semi-talented nebbishy dweeb, his “home run” at writing such a terrible teleplay would be seen as a funny over-estimation of his abilities. Similarly, the fact that both Susan and Cayla found him attractive could have been the source of some humor. That was not to be, though, as the one attempt was viciously slapped down (“I screwed up” “Yes, you did”) in order to demonstrate Les’ obvious (to TB) appeal.

So, thanks for your indulgence on this fine Sunday morning. As for today’s strip, why, let’s just take a look, and…oh good grief.