Murder In The Burnings: The Minor Suspects

So the burnings have suddenly turned into the world’s lamest Choose Your Own Adventure game. And we all know what the correct answer is in this world:

She’s got two valid reasons to call the police, a threatening mob standing in puddles of their own unburned accelerant, and the world’s greatest arsonist right next to her. But you do you, Lillian. Lord knows you have stellar judgment when it comes to not censoring other peoples’ reading material.

Continue reading “Murder In The Burnings: The Minor Suspects”

No Stranger To Controversy

Starting in the late 80’s, Batiuk’s obsequious period would end…and his smugly self-righteous period would gradually pick up steam.

The response to ‘Lisa’s Very Special Story About Teen Pregnancy’ was overwhelmingly positive. By Batiuk’s own admission, greater than any response he’d ever gotten. But, of course, there were a couple letters to the editor from people annoyed that their funny pages were being used for edu-tainment pamphlet.

And Batiuk took that criticism like an underbalanced weeble-wobble, dancing joyfully at receiving a weak slap.

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Stack Overflow

You guys have been KILLING it in the comments this week. I haven’t seen such creative and joyful art spun from such tone deaf dross since Stephen Colbert covered Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ on The Late Show with Jimmy Fallon. And this time I didn’t even have to put up with Jimmy Fallon to enjoy it.

I just had to put up with Les Moore.

It’s a SMUG-OFF!

I’m not here to put a damper on this at all. By all means! Keep the crazy theories coming. I know BJ6K has been collecting all the suspects and collating them into some truly epic posts. But how about a little history lesson palate cleanser, in the meantime?

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If The Burnings Were A Movie, You’d Walk Out. Let’s Write A Better One.

So we finally got to see the fire that canonically shuttered literacy for two generations.

In contrast, here’s a normal Wednesday at Ed Crankshaft’s house, which is considered comedy:

And here’s what we saw when Les Moore needed help coming to terms with letting Marianne Winters watch video tapes of his dead wife, even though some of them were benign enough to exhibit publicly.

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Continue reading “If The Burnings Were A Movie, You’d Walk Out. Let’s Write A Better One.”