Tag: Fire

Burn, baby, burn!

Link to what Bats hath wrought.

Wow. An entire week of Starbuck Jones and every bit of it has been peripheral to the actions of Funky Winkerbean regular cast members. I have to take back all the nasty things I’ve said about the writing in this strip – it’s obvious that Tom Batiuk is a genius – he’s managed to bring about a whole new comic (Starbuck Jones) while keeping the science fiction out and revolving the story entirely around the residents of his beloved Westview Ohio. Truly he is a master of his craft. Though I have to say that it would have been nice if there had been just a teeny bit of Mason Jarr hamming it up, or Marianne Winters’ cute little implied butt. No matter, there are still a few years to go until Bats gets that Lifetime Doodler Award or whatever, so I guess there’s plenty of time to inflict entertain us with the continuing interweaving of Funky Winkerbean and Starbuck Jones.

Oh, yeah, and before I forget – my wish was granted, too!

Mason, please, for the love of all that is holy, have Holly do her her Flaming Baton act.

— Me.

One last thing…we joke about this movie being “straight to cell phone” bad, but c’mon. We all know how bad it’s really going to be.

 

And…that’s it for my turn in the barrel. Beckoningchasm will be here tomorrow with some more high-quality snark, and I’ll be back in the comment section ruining T-Bat’s artwork.

Woo hoo! Les’s hair is on fire! Oh, wait.

Today’s strip, at first glance, seems to show Les, head aflame in the purifying fire of just desserts. But no, they’re just burning their Yuletide tree out in the field. That practice makes my Californian instincts turn to rage, and calls to mind Johnny Cash’s infamous “buzzards” incident.[1] Then I remembered that Ohio used to burn its rivers (for decades), and it all seemed to make more sense.[2]

The picture of the Cuyahoga River on fire that ended up in Time Magazine a month later – a truly arresting image showing flames leaping up from the water, completely engulfing a ship – was actually from a much more serious fire in November 1952. No picture of the ’69 river fire is known to exist.—Cleveland Historical

My live-in expert on all things Ohio tells me that residents of Buckeye Lake toss their trees into the water’s edge. This encourages the growth of algae, which attracts fish, which makes for easy fishing in the springtime. By the next winter, the tree will have completely decomposed. That seems awfully green for the midwest, but it’s a damn sight greener than just lighting it on fire and smirking at it.

Given how Cayla usually reacts to news from Les, I’ve corrected the dialog in panel 3.

Cayla asks, 'How much can we make Mason pay?'

  1. To be fair to Mr. Cash’s memory, the part about roasting 49 California condors appears to be apocryphal.  ↩
  2. Speaking of uniquely Cleveland things, thanks to @Nathan Obral (yesterthread) for pointing out that the Lost reference had extra meaning for those in the Cleveland TV market.  ↩