Tag: Flash

Q: What’s Batom’s Favorite Element? A: Bore-On

Link To This One

At a quick glance, “hadron” is real, real close to “hardon”, which might have made for a WAY more compelling super villain if you ask me. So what’s the deal with “Pion”? Is he or she supposed to be some sort of punk rock cheerleader or something? I mean, what would sub-atomic themed super villains even do?

Please, I was just thinking out loud so don’t take me literally and start to speculate, as no one needs or wants that. With each painfully slowly passing day, it becomes more and more obvious why Flash and Phil were out of work for fifty years. And correct me if I’m wrong here, but weren’t they all just standing around talking as recently as yesterday? So when did Phil draw this shit? Again, no need to actually answer that.

He Blinded Me With Word Balloons Pertaining To Science. Blinded Me, With Word Balloons Pertaining To Science!

Link To Today’s

Wow, what an ugly, ungainly mess this one is. The vertical single-paneler is possibly the most annoying FW gimmick of them all, but cramming it full of TWENTY word balloons takes this debacle to a whole new level of stupid. As usual, the gag here (“it’s all already been done”) is fine in and of itself, but the execution is botched, bungled and mangled beyond belief to the point where only hardcore FW readers will “get” it and even then it’s iffy. Thus far in 2022 there’s been a noticeable decline in the quality of the strip’s wry banter, to a point where you have to seriously wonder if perhaps there’s some sort of legitimate cognitive impairment involved. Or maybe it’s just the shittiness of the premise, it’s tough to tell one way or the other.

Humans Being Boring

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Wow, this Flash asshole sure has an attitude on him, especially considering how Pete got him his current gig after he more or less just wandered in off the street. Once again we see another stellar example of BatYam intentions being clear, but his dialog being all askew and peculiar. I guess “you mean like humans?” wouldn’t fit in the word balloon. Not that it would have helped all that much, but still.

Harnessing The Weak Force

Link To Today’s Installment

Finally, an in-depth look into the inner workings of a legendary comic book bullpen. It’s about damn time, too. I honestly had no idea that this is how they do it. I assumed the comic book writers and artists would sit around brainstorming, sketching and spitballing ideas around the room in a Red Bull and Skittles-fueled frenzy. But it turns out it’s really just two somewhat slow-witted morons slowly bungling their way into the foundation of a barely-passable premise. I have to imagine that they fill in the details after. I wonder how many other comic writers of note use that approach?

This is some really, really bad dialog right here. It reads like it was randomly generated, which I suppose it sort of was, in a manner of speaking. It’s just amazing how he can take a personal passion (in this case, legendary comic book company bullpens) and just completely and totally drain every last morsel of humor, joy and fun out of it, leaving nothing but dull, mundane and often confusing banter.

This Call To The Bullpen Is Brought To You By Intense Ennui

Link To This One

Blurgh. You have got to be f*cking kidding me. Not these two tiresome codgers again, it’s just too damn soon. The way this Flash asshole emerged from nowhere to become one of the most-used characters in the strip is one of Act III’s most astonishing developments. Suddenly Flash is pretty much the brains behind the entire Atomix Komix operation, the ever-patient comic book sage who spins his pathetic colleagues’ pitiful ramblings into comic book gold. He just has this undying fascination with this kind of ridiculous comic book creator banter, like this is how people actually work.

The less said about that woeful Type Face gag, the better. I liked Phil better when he was a gruff, surly jerk, as opposed to the moronic buffoon he is now. I liked him best of all when he was still dead, of course, but that ship has sailed.