Tag Archives: Holly

Do You Believe In Life After High School?

Link To Today’s Strip

Repeating the premise over and over always makes it funnier. Repeating the premise over and over always makes it funnier. See? There’s probably no cheaper dialog than “I can’t believe…”. “I can’t believe you knew Turtle Thompson!”…”I can’t believe how that guardrail just crumbled!”…”I can’t believe it’s been twelve years plus maybe ten more since Lisa died!”…a simple time-killing tactic courtesy of a simple time-killing man. If this was any other “writer” on the planet, the idea that he could get six full days out of this premise would really strain credulity. But here? Not so much.

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Locked And Bloated

Link To Today’s Strip

Well you definitely won’t laugh,

Or be entertained

Reading this thing is rotting my brain

Tom Batiuk is coming to town….

As always special thanks to TFH, the real brains behind this nutty operation! If you only knew what’s involved in making fun of this dopey comic strip…

It’s an extremely rare Sunday-into-Monday arc this week. He only saves those for the really groundbreaking stories. The idea well must have been running pretty dry when he dreamed this one up. I’m (sigh) roughly the same age as (sigh) Funky is supposed to be and I think about high school once a year, if that, on average. But Funky is still having gross sweaty fevered dreams about something he hasn’t done in thirty-five years, even though he has way, way, way more than enough post-high school trauma to draw nightmare fodder from. Perhaps he’ll decide enough is enough and drive his car off a cliff, although we’ve all seen his car and it seems unlikely that it’d go fast enough to do much damage. Still, though, it might be pretty amusing anyway.

In my decrepit 1980s-era high school, the first thing we did on the first day back was kick the locker door at the bottom, after which it’d just open with a kick and a pull. They weren’t exactly top-of-the-line lockers. The convenience far outweighed the lack of security. That’s what the gym lockers were for, as they were these big iron prison-issue things. People (ahem, cough cough Tom Batiuk) like to look back nostalgically and pretend everything was “better” way back then but in reality we were all surrounded by junk. Everything was really crappy and cheap and don’t let any cartoonists tell you otherwise.

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Dream Academy

Being late/running late is a very common theme in dreams…Being late in a dream as an image of finding it difficult living up to your own demands or the demands of others…When we dream that we are late or that we are about to be late, it is often because we are fighting a battle to achieve more than we can actually handle.

https://michaelrolsen.com/dreams-late-mean-dream-interpretation-late

It’s a pretty common dream, all right, so give Batiuk points for being relatable for once. I know I’ve had dreams of this type. The naked-in-public kind of dreams, too. Batiuk and Ayers do a pretty good job at giving this scenario a dreamlike feeling. The hallway appears infinite, and eerily empty. And while this is almost a universal dream premise, I bet Tom Batiuk hasn’t had this dream in ages. At this stage of his career, the only demands he probably has to meet are to submit one comic strip per day. It doesn’t have to be especially well drawn, or funny, or make sense, or follow a narrative. Just a piece of content, to fill space on a newspaper comics page or on a website.

Well, my two week long nightmare of having to deconstruct FW every day is ended, and on deck is guest emcee Epicus Doomus! Take it away!

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I Can No Longer Shop Happily

Rusty Shackleford
November 30, 2019 at 2:10 pm
Just where are they going for the weekend?

My hunch was that the Funkman and the missus might be flying to Dallas for their annual physical, as we saw them do nearly 2 years ago, but they’re not due until January. Guess they’ve gone off on a shopping trip. Is this a Sunday one-off, or will we be treated to a week-long clothes-shopping arc, like the one we endured with Les and Cayla last February? Let’s hope not!

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Saturday, November 30

Today’s strip wasn’t available for preview…

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Am I My Mother-in-Law’s Keeper?

Yeah, Holly’s all smiles today, but all week she’s done nothing but kvetch about her mother leaving the house a mess and maxing out the DVR. Funky, meanwhile, is considering renovating the guest bathroom for the old gal. OK, he could have phrased it a little better, but Funky expresses genuine concern for Melinda. His attitude towards his mother-in-law has softened considerably in the year since Melinda decided to make her stay permanent, but it’s not enough to spare him the old side-eye from the missus.

Programming note: Saturday’s, Sunday’s, and Monday’s strips are all unavailable for preview. I’ll post placeholders, but you’ll have to hold your snark til midnight EST.

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DV Aaarrrggghhh

Proof that video technology in the Funkiverse has indeed progressed beyond those VHS tapes that everyone hoards and cherishes.  We haven’t even seen Miranda this week, but her trail of destruction extends to every room of the Winkerbean house. In the comments here yesterday, Epicus described Tuesday’s zoomed in computer monitor gag “relatable,” and I find myself relating to today’s. Some years back, my wife’s grandmother, may she rest in peace, lived with us for awhile after being flooded out of her home. And oh boy, did she love her tee vee. We didn’t (and still don’t) have a DVR, but Nana watched the tube all hours of the day and night. “Downton Abbey” and “Golden Girls” not so much, but “Law & Order” apparently can be found any time on one cable channel or another, and after awhile, that signature “DUN DUN!” sounder that gets played at scene changes drove me right up the wall.

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Hyper Text

When she’s not strewing pill bottles and soiled laundry all around the house, “MIL-inda” (Funky’s Mother-In-Law Melinda, get it?) likes to unwind by hopping on the family iMac and giving her retinas a workout on the ol’ Retina display. The Mac OS has a host of accessibility features, including one called Zoom Way the Fuck In (keyboard shortcut: ⌘ + ⌥ + ⇧ + ⌃ + F), which renders screen fonts in billboard sizes. It might behoove Funky to set the blind old biddy with her own user account, which she could customize however she likes without inconveniencing everyone else, but then we wouldn’t be treated to today’s boffola gag.

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Shower Scene

Evidence of Miranda’s slatternliness extends to every room of the Winkerbean home. It’s enough to make Funky consider converting the half bath in the guestroom to a 3/4 bath with the addition of a shower. He’s pretty resigned about it too, which is surprising; the Funkman strikes me as someone who’s pretty tight with a buck.

bobanero
November 25, 2019 at 8:10 am
Isn’t Holly’s mother roughly the same age as Funky’s father? Why aren’t they just sticking her in Bedside Manor?

I guess it’s cheaper to make the old crone comfy at home, rather than to put her up with horny ol’ Morton at Bedside Manor. And if Funky adds a mini fridge, a hotplate or microwave, and a sturdy lock on the door, he can keep his mother-in-law out of sight and out of mind ’til she blessedly croaks!

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Teen-ior Moment

A tip of the SoSF pillbox hat to comicbookharriet for her outstanding commentary these last two weeks!

Before the Army made a man out of him, we all know that Cory Winkerbean was a thief, a cheater, a vandal, and generally a smartass. Today we learn that he was also a pillhead and a slob, too wasted or apathetic to even try and hide his addiction from his mom. I’d suggest that Cory inherited his slovenliness from his grandmother Melinda, but I seem to recall (correct me if I’m wrong) that, like half of his Act III contemporaries, Cory’s an adoptee.

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