Tag: New York

Les is Not Im-pressed

Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, former-bag-lady-turned-semi-attractive (by FW standards) literary agent Ann Apple informs Les that “we may have found a publisher for your book (this deal’s not done yet?): the KSU press.” And what is Les’ reply on hearing that he’s on the verge of finally accomplishing something?

  1. “That’s great news, Annie; you really came through for me.”
  2. “Kent State University Press? I had to fly to New York City to have my book published in O-friggin’-hio? Ya fired!”
  3. “Sounds like a winery.”

Yeah, you guessed it, Les went for the “funny” response. “Funny” as in here’s a guy who dreams of being published but doesn’t associate the word “press” with printing, only with red, red wine. Maybe Annie, the former bum, will appreciate the “pun”.

Welcome to (My) Jungle

AAAIIIIIEEEEEEEEE (Click to view larger)

Nothing caps off a depressing week of “un-funnies” like the ol’ sideways-formatted comic-book cover “tribute”. And this week’s honoree is even more obscure than usual. “Jungle Comics”? Must have been before my time. The comic books I spent my allowance on were 15¢, not 10¢…and I Google-image-searched“Jungle Comics covers” and I get the feeling that “Jungle” comics were kept behind the counter instead of on the rotating wire rack next to Superman…lookit all that leg! This stuff might’ve been pre-Comics Code.

Check out grimacing, shirtless (fortunately that’s cropped out) Funky, tangling ass with an exquisitely coiffed mandrill. Careful with that knife, Funk-zan, you might cut your other hand…if that is your other hand; in my paper it’s colored differently than your knife-wielding hand. Maybe the mandrill’s throwing a right?

Anyway, what’s the gag here? “…turning over a new leaf goes pretty much unnoticed when you live in a jungle.” As Livia Soprano would’ve said: “Ohh, poor you!” I’m thinking that TB was just so intent on shoehorning in a tribute to his fetish comics that he crafted yet another stilted, un-lifelike “punchline” to justify it. What “jungle” does Funky live in? Westview, Ohio? He’s the richest, albeit most miserable man in town. The hell with this jungle, ask your nephew cousin Wally about being stuck in a Godforsaken desert hellhole for five or ten years.

Don't Dream it's Over

Down-on-his-heels pizza magnate Funky has arrived in New York City with his best friend/flunky Les to “shutter” the apparently already-shuttered Montoni’s East. Les, carrying a cardboard box (the universal symbol of GTFO) tries to cheer up his old friend…but Funky, referring to himself in the third person, informs Les that “it’s over, Johnny….over!”