You can only get so many smiles out of cancer, before you have to resort to gags about the eldery.
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Tagged as book tour, hatchet face, Les, Les' yellow shirt, Lisa's Story, pencil wrists, tiny hands
Elderly Woman: “You’ve had quite a crowd here today for your book signing.”
Les: *stony silence*
Elderly Woman: “Sir? I am speaking to you.”
Elderly Woman: “You wipe that smirk off of your face, young man. See this walker here? Old fashioned. Made of cold, hard steel. Guess where this walker is going if you don’t start acting politely to your elders?”
Probably a serious contender for “Funniest FW Of 2011”: at least in the top ten (provided there are nine others yet to come this year). Sad, but true. I’d bet that after writing this bit of hilarity, Mr. B was so hysterical he needed half a white Valium to calm back down.
That horrifying hatchet/crone face really makes it tough to appreciate the levity, though, I mean yikes. Les’ fans are like the Army of the freaking Dead. I like how he added a few young-ish looking people to today’s line, just to remind us that not EVERY Les Moore fan is at death’s door! Although their presence in that line does indicate they’re definitely suffering from something.
And when I started reading this strip I had a sense of humor…
“Yessir, Mr. Moore, just standin’ here in this line o’ misery has robbed me of the use of my legs. It’s just suckin’ the life right out of all of us. Why, I turned ’round a few minutes ago and saw that th’ folks behind me had lost all their skin! It’s sorta like this whole bookstore’s turned into a peninsula into Hell, Mr. Batiuk… Er, I mean, Moore. Moore! That’s whut I meant! Don’t go killin’ me!”
By the way, ladies and gentlemen, “Lisa’s Story” is a real book, available for purchase from author T*m B*t**k! Plenty of copies available!
Les is excited because he just noticed that Cayla Version 1.0 is next in line.
Jeffcoat: I assumed she was a huge Les fan who’d really done her homework. I also assumed the guy behind her was yet another one of Lisa’s kids, conceived that time she got backstage at a Jim Nabors concert.
Why do I get the feeling TB drags along a car trunk full of “Lisa’s Story” with him where-ever he goes with a portable card table and glamor shot and just starts doing book signings anywhere; soccer games, at the mall, at grocery stores and laundromats back in Ohio?
David O: Malls across America have warnings posted about a mysterious man who will materialize between the hot pretzel stand and the hydro massage machine, asking people if they’d like a heartwarming collection of comic strips about how only he, and he alone understands cancer.
I shudder to think that this old bird might be picking up a couple of Les’s books to line the shelves with at the nursing home library. If you thought the old guy in the Hoveround commercial was distraught over being “headed for the nursing home!!” imagine how he’d feel if he knew shelves of “Lisa’s Story” were waiting there for him as well.
Good one, Epicus! Though I’m most surprised each day doesn’t reveal a new Susan doppleganger in line. Who knew Les stalkers would come in all shapes and colors?
Gad! Has Les ever looked more punchable than he does in P2? If Kaz doesn’t show, maybe the old broad will beat him senseless with the walker.
@Epicus – Does Jim Nabors have a van?
David O. and John – buh-ZING! couldn’t have said any of that better myself.
I also assumed the guy behind her was yet another one of Lisa’s kids, conceived that time she got backstage at a Jim Nabors concert.
Come to look for his step-father no doubt…
Just what every old person wants, a book that reaffirms that everybody has to die sometime. I’ll take PEANUTS any day of the week.
The thing that gets me is, it’s -not- impossible to do a serious series of comic strips that explore the conflicting emotions that arise when a loved one has cancer:
The problem is, I think, is that the graphic novel I linked to was created specifically to deal with those feelings, in an emotionally charged, brutally honest way.
In contrast, the “Lisa Dies” story was created to glorify (guess who?) the author and garner him accolades. Thus, it just didn’t have the chops to pull anything off beyond a particularly melodramatic Lifetime made-for-TV movie.
@Sgt Saunders – right on. When a person ‘s head sinks into their shoulders the way neck-Les does in P2, they are thinking something other than what they are hearing, as if the head is shrinking away from the speaker. In Les’s case it is probably some variant of “please die of cancer.”