You know what’s happening here, right? Harry is hanging up his coat in preparation of that putting out that he mentioned. Do you still have any of that brain bleach left over? Useful stuff, isn’t it! But with Funky Winkerbean, you don’t want to rely on the store-brand stuff, you want the professional kind.
I have no idea who Andy Clark is, other than the former keyboard player for Be-Bop Deluxe. (He was apparently the white-haired guy in the Sunday strip with the expression of wanting to be anywhere else than Montoni’s.) I also cannot recall any strip in the past, oh, year or so in which it was mentioned he was on an airplane (oops, there I go assuming again, he could be flying by jetpack–it is the future after all) and what that had to do with any of the sad, shriveled lives in Westview. I do remember that Harry had a book out, though. The reason for this shout-out baffles me, though. Of course, all of Funky Winkerbean baffles me, so that’s nothing new.
I’m going to take a stab here and look at this “Guys don’t do that” thing. By the way, I’m a guy and I do do that, so I don’t think Tom Batiuk’s illustrating some kind of “male truth” here. But I recall the strip from February or March in which Dopey Pete asked Darrin to give his regards to the old gang, and they both immediately agreed that they wouldn’t actually do this. That’s some very strange reasoning going on, if “reasoning” is the right word. Maybe “guys” don’t like to greet each other, or say “How’s it going” or some damn thing. But Harriet said “we” so is his own refusal supposed to override whatever she might do? Also, these people have been married for fifty years–wouldn’t she know a little bit about how her husband behaves? This is giving me a headache.
Also, it looks as if Harriet has sewn her right hand to her blouse. I suppose in Tom Batiuk’s worldview, that’s something that women just do, huh? Amirite, guys?
Andy Clark also played on David Bowie’s Scary Monsters album. Now he’s publishing books by Harry Dinkle. “Drug overdose” is starting to look like a better career-capper, eh Andy?
Son of Stuck Funky 
Wow. Seeing how the Dinkles just arrived home after the “party”, “Andy Clark” must have taken the Concorde or hitched a ride on the space shuttle to have gotten home so soon. Difficult to believe that someone flew into Ohio for such a shitty party in the first place, too.
A rare error in today’s strip: where Batom used “guys” where he obviously meant to say “giant self-absorbed dickwads”. Thanking your “publisher” (does anyone in Westview NOT have a publisher?) for flying in from God knows where to attend a two hour party in a shabby pizza place seems like the very least one could do, but then again I’m a semi-regular person, not one of the obnoxious weirdos who populate this strip. Now that his good deed for this half-century is over, I guess he’ll go back to being the same boring moron whose entire existence centers solely around marching bands and pointless, redundant jokes about same. And Harriet will go back to Khan’s, which is where all the seldom-seen and easily-forgotten FW side characters hang out between appearances.
Typical self-indulgent Batyuck. Guess he wanted to send one of his butt buddies a public shout-out via his “comic strip”
Batyuck, you son of a bitch, you and your shitty “comic strip” deserve to be ridiculed!
And Andy Clark? YOU SUCK!
Harriet: “It was nice for the six, maybe seven people who are the -only- people we ever interact with EVER to come to our *sob* 50th anniversary party at the ONLY PLACE WE EVER EAT, EVER. Anyway, I’ve decided to become extremely specific about information you’d already know and ask you if you think we should call your PUBLISHER, ANDY CLARK to see if his FLIGHT HOME was okay?”
Harry: “EVIL TECHNOLOGY!”
Harriet: *sigh*
***********************************
And at last it becomes clear: The reason why Les and every other Favored Maleof Tom in Westview never call anyone, ever: They think using a phone is unmanly. Communication? Concern for others? That’s WIMMEN’s WERK!
You filthy misogynist bigot, Tom.
Is it a rule in Westview that you must specify a person’s relevant information when discussing them? “My father, John Darling,” your publisher Andy Clarke,” “insufferable local douchebag Les Moore,” etc.
Lol at Tom Batiuk spouting off about “man rules.” The men in FW make the guys in 9CL look like badasses.
Yeah, you definitely shouldn’t call Harry. You need to keep the airport lines open for Phantom Warnings between Les and his dead wife.
“You know what’s happening here, right? Harry is hanging up his coat in preparation of that putting out that he mentioned.”
Oh, God, and they’re gonna do it right in front of the windows with the curtains drawn wide open, just to make sure that we all become unwitting voyeurs in this dirty little chess match.
Apparently, from that illustration, Harry’s Publisher Andy Clark is also my Aunt Faye.
She’s probably just asking him to call because she expects him to die from a typical Westview plane crash/maiming/typical Westview bout of a new strain of SuperCancer/burned alive. Tom is already “writing” the Andy Clark story.
So does anyone know what happened to the cake?
Gyre: “What happened to the cake?”
Yeah, Nicholas Cage wants a piece!
(Mildly NSFW)
So does anyone know what happened to the cake?
The cake was ruined when it was revealed that Holly has one of the weirdest fetishes in the world. She slapped on a bikini, sat on the cake and farted.
And everyone at the party still ate it.
You’re welcome.
And obviously you damn exposition-hating nitpickers are overreacting. Dinkle obviously knows multiple Andy Clarks, and must be told which one Harriet is referring to. He also had many different parties today so Harriet had to specify that she was talking….
Oh, what’s the damn use.
Anyway, that’s the joke. Dinkle’s not going to make a courtesy call to his publisher and friend because he’s a man. You may laugh now.
This comic strip is an insult to one-celled organisms.
What’s in the funnies today?
…Oh, internalized misandry! You never fail to make me laugh!
Harriet: “Andy, this is Harriet Dinkle. My rude husband, Harry Dinkle, the retired band conductor and amateur erotic photographer, refused to call to make sure you arrived home safely, instead he’s on the sofa naked eating potato chips and telling me its time to pay up. Anyway, did YOU, or are you horribly maimed?”
Andy:”Uh, I’m still in the security line at Westview International Airport. Didn’t I leave you, like 30 minutes ago? Do you even know how flight travel works?”
Harriet: “not really, I leave complicated things like that to the men-folk.”
“You heard that colored woman at our 50th wedding anniversary party, Harriet. She called us ‘guys’. If you’re gonna be a guy you damn well better start acting like one!”
Here’s a review of a 1988 production that includes a synopsis, and the truly aimless among you may enjoy an 88-minute video of the entire thing!
First TB uses his characters to gripe about readers who call him out, now he’s using them to take shots at publishers who told him Could Be Another Book Deal Here: The Third Shoe wouldn’t sell…
TFH, it’s “good” to see that video of Walnut (seriously?) High School’s performance of Funky Winkerbean’s Homecoming finally made its way to Youtube from the old Google Video service.
I actually watched the whole thing about 3 years ago. While I don’t recommend it, I can say it’s better than the average FW strip if you can get past Dinkle and the band’s repetitive and absurdly overlong opening number.
If you are brave enough to watch it, keep an eye out for interludes with TB’s Act I gags involving inanimate objects (leaves, desks) having conversations, school announcements, and the hall monitor machine gun. Also of note, Les is pretty much as neurotic and obnoxious as you would expect, so kudos to the kid who had to play him I guess. And if you can make it close to the end, enjoy the best part of the play, a cameo by
Selma DiamondCrankshaft.Back in the 70’s my local high school did a fine rendition of Lil Abner the musical. I guess that’s the inspiration for hacks like Batiuk and Evans writing musicals nobody asked for. That synopsis sounds like a parody of FW, I bet the song lyrics are just excruciating.
The FW Wiki actually contains this phrase under the entry for the musical TFH brought to our attention: “Popular among high school drama groups…”
Bull. Shit.
I’ve vaguely heard of that musical before but tell me, is the goat mascot one of the stars or I am thinking of some old porn movie?
That is a drag queen portraying a cheerleader on the cover of that script, correct?
I’m surprised Medina High School doesn’t have to perform “Funky Winkerbean’s Homecoming” every year.
Meanwhile, this arc has destroyed another once-beloved FW character. Harry Dinkle (gawd how I hate typing that name) has shown himself to be a whining, complaining, horny, jerk.
From the YouTube description for FW’s H:
“This is Walnut High School’s production of ‘Funky Winkerbean’s Homecoming’. This performance was recorded on March 31, 1990. Walnut High School no longer exists…”
Victim of budget cuts or burnt to the ground by an angry mob on April 1, 1990?
“Your agent Andy Clark.” Just like “my father John Darling.” Human beings do not converse about close associates and family members this way.
“That is a drag queen portraying a cheerleader on the cover of that script, correct?”
Jeffcoat, I think that’s “Junebug”, who played on the girl’s basketball team and appeared peripherally throughout Act I. She also showed up for The Coming Reunion (bottom row, 3rd from right) back in late 2008.
Bad Writers Have Nothing to Say
He is talking about screenplays, but…
Boy, the artwork on that script is really awful. I do like how the cheerleaders are setting up to give Harry a massive kick in the crotch, however.