Unpunny

Wow, after coming up with pretty lame planet/pizza based pun after pun, Tony settles on a random string of words strung together in today’s strip and we’re supposed to be impressed?

Pizza Purveyor!? Is there anything Mason *doesn’t* do? Are we really supposed to believe Hollywood stars and starlets are going to eat greasy, fattening, skin-wrecking pizza while working on an action film that probably demands a rigorous workout?

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22 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

22 responses to “Unpunny

  1. Rusty Shackleford

    As usual, Dave gets it right and says what we are all thinking.

    Yeah, those stars are gonna love that doughy greasy flavorless mess that Montoni’s calls pizza.

  2. Epicus Doomus

    Sure Tom, the star of a huge-budgeted major motion picture arranged the catering for the staff, uh-huh. So what, each day Wally’s going to schlep a van load of crappy pizza into Cleveland, then schlep his way back. Sure, why not? It’s not like anyone in Westview is buying the shit.

    So why not go all-out with this? Have Komix Korner be the official comic book supplier for SJ, have the WHS marching band be the official marching band of SJ and, uh…let’s see, pizza, comic books, marching band music…that just about covers it.

  3. I can see the headlines now: “Starbuck Jones Movie Shuts Down Due to Botulism Outbreak.”

  4. spacemanspiff85

    @Epicus Doomus:
    Dinkle’s doing the soundtrack, I guarantee. And Les will end up writing the novelization.

  5. Gerard Plourde

    So Mason Jarr, the actor can hire the writers, scout remote sites for location scenes, secure talent for cameos, and contract for meal service for the production, When do we get told that he’s financing the movie?

  6. Saturnino

    “let’s see, pizza, comic books, marching band music…that just about covers it.”

    Les as the official village idiot

  7. [IMG]http://i67.tinypic.com/t87z0g.jpg[/IMG]

  8. Continuity Police alert: Tony shaved his mustache for the first panel.

  9. Jim in Wisc.

    @HeyItsDave: Perhaps space is just as malleable as time in the Batiukverse, depending upon what lame story contrivance Tommy is trying to convey. One day Westview is a full day’s drive away, the next it’s five minutes away.

  10. Jimmy

    @Fred Blurt: That’s actually Kilroy in panel 1.

    I predict the Westview economy will collapse when evil Hollywood strip mines its precious pizza resource, since Montoni’s is the only economic driver in the community.

  11. And the sad thing is that we wasted six days to get here just because someone wants to get himself a gold watch.

  12. @Paul Jones–It’s not so sad as it is anger induced. I mention several plotlines that should’ve been revisited instead of this weeks garbage.

    When Batiuk wrote about Lisa’s pregnancy, he upped his own game. This week, he refused to bring his A game to go along with it.

  13. Saturnino

    “I can see the headlines now: “Starbuck Jones Movie Shuts Down Due to Botulism Outbreak.””

    Who is going to be the official stomach pump supplier?

  14. Saturnino

    “I predict the Westview economy will collapse when evil Hollywood strip mines its precious pizza resource, since Montoni’s is the only economic driver in the community.”

    And there is apparently no high end caterer in the area to satisfy the accustomed culinary needs of a movie company.

  15. hitorque

    I TOLD YOU! Predicted it ages ago…

    Nothing, and I mean NOTHING stands in the way of the Westview Cronyism Mafia! Even the *real* mafia would be jealous at how easily the Westview Crew pulls strings… I’m guessing the world premiere of “Starbuck Jones” will be at that hole-in-the-wall ratty theater that Mason dragged everyone to last month?? (Assuming of course they ever FILM the movie, and as far as we all know they still haven’t even started because Mason has plenty of lucrative, do-nothing jobs that he has yet to give away.

    And this is only the beginning — Batiuk still has yet to incorporate Leslie Moore, Chullo kid and the rest of the high school clique, Bull Bushka and whatever sport he’s currently coaching, the losers at the Komix Korner, St. Lisa’s never-before-released videotapes, the AAA Toledo Mudhens, Harry Dinkle can compose the soundtrack, etc. etc…

  16. hitorque

    @Gerard Plourde

    I’m pretty sure the studio pulled funding for this project a year ago, and didn’t tell Mason because he’s such a colossal douche obsessed with hiring everybody in his fiance’s hometown instead of professionals — So he’ll be in for the shock of his life once some of these bills start coming due.

    Either that, or the studio went bankrupt after their cash reserves were drained propping up the Westview Cronyism Mafia.

  17. Saturnino

    “I’m pretty sure the studio pulled funding for this project a year ago, and didn’t tell Mason because he’s such a colossal douche obsessed with hiring everybody in his fiance’s hometown instead of professionals”

    And Cindy was fired from Buddyblog for not showing up (no need to tell her) and was replaced by the real Buddy the service dog after they got the idea from an old Monty Python skit………………….

  18. I think Mason is a bipolar multi-millionaire who’s not an actor at all, though he thinks he is.

    I think he finds out what would make someone happiest, then spends money to make them think that is what is going to happen. He sets up his brother or uncle as head of CME, gets his friends jobs as screenwriters, etc, casts cameos, hired the food, And so on. All under the impression that there’s going to be a Starbuck Jones movie.

    CME is real, of course, but everything else is make believe. But they’re all so happy! And even when they learn there’s no movie, they’ll still be happy, right? And it’ll be”Yay for Mason! ” right?

    I almost feel sorry for him when that day arrives.

  19. Jimmy

    @beckoningchasm: That actually is a good storyline.