Nightmares… And Other Tales From The Batiuk Bungle

Today’s stri-uh-YAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

OK, maybe I’m overreacting. Maybe it will help if I picture Cindy blinkin-

Don't worry, she can't steal your soul. If you read Funky Winkerbean, it has already been stolen.

GWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  That actually makes it worse, moving this thing from “terrifying drawing on a balloon wearing a wig” to “living creature”.

I don’t really know what is going on here, nor do I want to. I only know that I won’t be sleeping for the better part of a week.

Laughter-hewn De Light

In today’s strip we see the rare Montoni’s customer in its natural habitat. It was believed by many that these rare creatures had become extinct in the early 2010s. They are still sighted occasionally, as we see today, but such appearances are increasingly uncommon. In fact, Montoni’s customers are seen less often these days than Barney Google, Annie Warbucks, and Irma the diner waitress from Garfield.

It is easy to see why the Montoni’s customer is on the verge of extinction, their natural habitat is an extremely hostile environment. Nearly-inedible food, abysmal service, regular appearances by coffee-gulping comic store employees and that guy with the goatee, and now frequent power outages. Those few Montoni’s customers who remain are sullen and churlish, ultimately accepting of their fate of eating a loaf Sunbeam drizzled with store-brand olive oil in lieu of what they ordered but not entirely resigned to it.

Profiles In Nerdage

I am obligated to link to today’s strip, but I cannot in good conscience recommend reading it.

Did we really spend three days watching Lefty screw with DSH just so she could ultimately call Comic-Con “nerd prom” and smirk? Three days, nine panels, four sleeve pins, and dozens of bricks… all for “nerd prom” and a smirk.

DSH and Crazy were not nearly this excited about going to Comic-Con back when they went in 2014. In fact they invited Holly to come along on a whim and acted as if they went quite often, if not every year. So what’s with this panel 3 scene?

I dare say that TB has ruined the Electric Company for me…
Cr... Ap... Crap!

Brick Fac-sad

DSH sweats!
Lefty grows a unibrow!
Crazy continues the week in silence!
This, bricks, and more(tar)…
Only in today’s installment of Funky Winkerbean.

I have to hand it to Becky here (go ahead and boo), she’s really got John wrapped around her finger… extorting him with a sentence and a look as if she was an infamous Mafioso, all while looking like Pavel Chekov in a red windbreaker.

Cold-blooded stuff. I think we now know who was responsible for Kevin, DSH’s short and good-natured friend and employee, “leaving” Komix Korner.

Apple core. Baltimore. Who’s your friend?

So in today’s strip we finally get to the particulars of DSH’s actual compensation for being a part-time researcher. This is the third consecutive strip in which the DSH’s compensation has been discussed, by the way. On a scale of molasses to SR-71, the pacing of this week’s story arc is Rex Morgan.

A trip to Comic-Con is on tap in the near future, oh boy! The way this strip works, it may just wind up being DSH talking about his trip to Comic-Con. Lefty tries to guilt her husband into taking her as the one “friend” he can bring by using a tactic she saw on a Dumont Network sitcom. Will Crazy counter her move with something he cribbed from a Burns and Allen routine? Tune in next week (probably) to find out!

Of course, none of this is happening until the movie rolls out at Comic-Con. You know, back in 2014, the release date was supposed to be “next summer”. Considering the work we’ve seen done for the film thus far and the fact that they are just now hiring a researcher, I’m guessing the actual roll out will be sometime around 2025.