Month: September 2016

Look at that Caveman Go

Okay, there seems to be a motif at work here…I mean aside from the fact that today’s strip is a rehash of the day before, with Wally as a cartoon caveman in the last panel instead of the first. It’s a pretty safe bet that everyone recognized Fred Flintstone in Monday’s strip;  no doubt some of you recognized Alley Oop, but I had to shake my head at this Tip of the Funky Felt Tip to a character I thought obscure even by Tom Batiuk’s standards.

According to Wikipedia, the Alley Oop comic strip was created by American cartoonist V. T. Hamlin in 1932. This surprised me, as I’d had Oop pegged as a prewar contemporary of Little Nemo and The Yellow Kid. I was even more surprised to learn that the strip survives over 80 years later and today appears in more than 600 newspapers. That’s roughly half again as many papers that carry Funky Winkerbean.

Yabba Dabba Duh

Instead of allowing the “Bullzheimer’s” prestige arc to gain momentum, Batiuk has us check in on another of Westview’s lost souls. Not only does Wally find the campus environment daunting: the mere act of online registration makes him feel hopelessly ancient. Perhaps he’d have an easier time had he not waited until the semester had already begun. I don’t know if Fred Flintstone’s what you call a “real” Neanderathal, but Rachel does kind of resemble Wilma, now that Batiuk’s remembered to make her a redhead.

Goat Cheese

Link to today’s strip

For two whole weeks BanTom teased the possibility of Bull being stricken with a serious medical malady but, as usual, it turned out to be less than nothing. Today he’s back on the sidelines, cracking wise about how shitty his football team is. I guess the Scapegoats recent run of (relative) success never happened either. FW has reached a point where you don’t even need to read it to know what’s “going on”, so to speak. Same old, same old. Plus Les is still around for some reason, apparently just to annoy everyone for no real reason. Again, same old, same old.

And that’s it for me, stay tuned for the legendary founder of SoSF, TF Hackett, as he takes the wheel for what promises to be a whole lot of glacially-paced nothingness!

What, Les Worry?

Link to today’s strip

Way to spin a yarn there, BanTom. I mean what a pitiful effort, all that sound and fury and in the end it’s all a big fat zero. Just Dick Facey pretending to give a crap and Linda “worrying” about Bull’s inability to reminisce about things that happened thirty years ago. This “story” literally went nowhere. Is Bull going to seek medical attention? Are they going to discuss it with him? Will it ever be mentioned again? Who the hell knows? My guess is no, of course, as that might involve actually telling a story in some sort of linear coherent manner and we all know THAT just isn’t going to f*cking happen. I mean I knew he’d find some way to weasel his way out of his premise like he always does but, as usual, he found a way even weaker and more pathetic than I ever even imagined he would. So Linda got home from work safely…big f*cking deal. What a sorry display, why even create these premises if he finds them so boring he can’t even bring himself to resolve them?

Great, Maybe Les Will Write A Book About It

Link to today’s strip

“Failure To Charge: Bull’s Phone’s Story”. Talk about an anti-climax. After all that, Bull merely skulks home all sad-sack and sorry while Dick Facey smirks away like driving Linda home was some historically altruistic act of kindness, what a dick. His “phone died” (actually it was working fine until he threw it against some filing cabinets but I digress) and he was unable to find his wife who works in the same building? Oh, that’s right…the head injuries. Interesting how a story about Bull becoming forgetful makes the average FW reader’s brain malfunction as well, although in fairness any TomBan authored story is going to fry some synapses, what with the total lack of logic, continuity and common sense and all.

This has long been one of Batiuk’s favorite tactics. He introduces a premise that’s rooted (at least somewhat) in a “real issue affecting real people and blah blah”, then that’s it. They never actually go anywhere, nothing ever actually happens and nothing ever changes when they’re finished. Then he’ll gloat about how he “explored” the issue of concussions among football players even though in actuality he did no such thing, he merely brought it up is all. It’s like going out with your friends, saying “hey, how about this election, huh?” then claiming you “discussed politics” all night. I thought he might at least try to wring a “what can WE do about this issue?” kind of thing out of this but apparently even that’s too much to ask.