Symphonic Sweet

Having established an theme for the week, the cartoonist must next come up with five, maybe six more strips to move the story forward. Since Dinkle’s already been honored with an eponymous line of marching band shoes (in real life!), having a candy bar named after him seems like a natural. But the “Harry L. Dinkle Raisin the Bar“? Well, there are some confections that combine chocolate and raisins; throw in peanuts and you’ve got the delicious Chunky bar. But “raisin bar” suggests a baked treat, not a candy bar. And while hitting a sales record does indeed constitute “raisin[g] the bar”, you’d think recognition of Dinkle’s “career in music” would merit some kind of musical play on words.

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18 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “Symphonic Sweet

  1. DOlz

    I’m beginning to think this whole thing is a ruse. Stay with me, Belgium is next door to the Netherlands. The Hague in the Netherlands houses the International Court of Justice. Perhaps Dinkle is finally going to brought up on charges of crimes against humanity and excessive dickishness.

  2. billytheskink

    This thing probably won’t end up being a big seller. The list of word combinations more appetizing than “Harry L. Dinkle Rasin” is pretty much infinite.

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Every once in a while TomBat will drop a pun or bit of wordplay so foul and so deeply annoying it’s all you can do to refrain from fetching the torches and pitchforks and heading straight to mid-central Ohio will ill intent in your heart and a fierce loathing of bad puns in your rage-filled eyes. Today is one of those days. No one on God’s green earth is going to put anything called “The Harry L. Dinkle Raisin The Bar” anywhere near their mouths (or any other orifices) much less eating it. If anyone dared to attempt to sell me a Dinkle-based candy bar I’d have no choice but to kick them in the stomach.

    Coming soon: After failing to divulge his free trip to Belgium to the school board, Dinkle is banished from WHS for life. The “Harry L. Dinkle Center For The Performing Arts” is re-christened “The Lisa Moore Remembrance Building To Remember Lisa” and Dinkle’s awards and accomplishments are permanently expunged from the WHS records. With no one else to turn to, Dinkle asks Bull to hit him in the head over and over so he’ll be able to forget too. It doesn’t work and his suddenly much younger looking wife finally leaves him on the same day revisionist historians unanimously agree that John Philip Sousa was an overrated war-mongering hack who lifted most of his best known work from a Native American songwriter named Band Will March.

  4. count of tower grove

    Never cared for Chunky bars either.

  5. spacemanspiff85

    It’s pretty telling that Batiuk writes a story about a band director being honored and it’s about the guy who retired over a decade ago, not the current one.

  6. Jimmy

    Come on, they wouldn’t go with the more obvious Dinkleberry Bar?

  7. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “That’s wonderful, Harry! How does it make you feel?”

    “Well, it ain’t raisin, but it is twitchin’ a mite.”

  8. Charles

    Batiuk probably should have realized that he really shouldn’t do stories about food being named after one of his characters when that character’s name is a pun on “Hairy Penis”.

    I do find this week interesting because it’s shown how badly he’s forgotten how Harriet is supposed to look, and that the only characteristic he remembers is her wind-blown hairstyle. That and her disproportionately distended cheeks when viewed from behind. He’s also forgotten that she has other facial expressions than “Empty Bemusement”.

  9. The really odd thing is that English is a foreign language where he’s going…..and about to become more so.

  10. Rusty Shackleford

    Killing more time till retirement.

    Did anyone read the CK blog where they mentioned Chuck Ayers from Crankshaft is retiring? He will sit in on some story arcs for FW?

  11. sgtsaunders

    I suggest “Nutboy”. (“They’re shitty!).

  12. Dood

    Thanks, Mr. The Bar.

  13. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    What, are they sending him mail every day now? I would have thought this, um, tasty treat would have been mentioned by him in the same breath as “they want me to come to Belgium.”

    “Oh look! They want to fly me to Belgium to receive an award… and they named a candy bar after me!” That’s what most Earth Humans would probably say. Oh, wait… hold on… Tommy Batyuck writes this? Oh, I see. He’s stretching this out an additional day this way. Now it makes sense.

    Anybody know his new wife’s name? I’ll just call her Not-Harriet, just like Cayla’s actual name is Not-Lisa. Not-Harriet is a woman of few words. Dinkleberry likes it that way. He special-ordered her from the Batyuck Comic Strip Character Factory without vocal cords. He had to rap Harriet on the nose with a rolled up newspaper every time she tried to speak. That got to be a bother. Easier this way for the only character in FW who loves the sound of his own voice even more than Les.

  14. Hitorque

    1. Okay, Batiuk, we get that some consolidated foods corporation in Bruxelles wants to give him an award… You don’t have to waste the first panel of every day re-hashing that fact…

    2. A Dinkle Bar? Yeah, that’ll go over real well in Europe… At least now we know this charade is nothing but a setup…

    3. We know the drill by now… This will end in either: A. Hoax/prank; B. Harry can’t get a passport because of bureaucratic hell so the honors go to someone else; or C. Harry goes over there to discover there was an accounting mistake and someone else won it…

  15. Raising the bar. It definitely needs raising. Since St. Lisa got Cancer again, Batiuk has lowered the bar to the depth of the Marianas Trench.

  16. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    It’s quite appropriate that this candy includes the two things I hate most. Raisins and Funky Winkerbean characters. .

  17. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    Hell are raisins even a thing in Belgium chocolate? I could be wrong but aren’t raisins more of an American chocolate thing?

  18. Nothing dealing with Dinkle should be referred to as “raisin'”. “Lower” is much better. The Harry L. Dinkle Lower Intestine Experience would be a much more appropriate name.