A Coach Stropp Saved Is A Coach Stropp Urned

Link To Today’s Strip

And suddenly, many months after the fact, that moronic arc where Bull dug up a hunk of grass and plopped it on his special “football memories” shelf comes full circle. Apparently vandalizing WHS property is OK if it’s for nostalgic purposes, which doesn’t surprise me at all. I like how the grass on his shelf is still sort of green, seeing how it’s all uprooted and dead and all. Quite a hardy turfgrass blend on that field, although it would have been funnier if Bull had ruined a costly Astroturf field instead.

So is the little tuft supposed to be where Bull stupidly dropped Coach Stropp? And if so, is he suggesting that Coach Stropp’s remains acted as a fertilizer that cause the grass to rapidly grow on that spot? Because if so, ewwww. Not to mention totally inaccurate, as you’d really want to use a higher nitrogen fertilizer at this time of year, one with a nice pre-emergent to keep those unsightly crabgrass clumps at bay. If Coach Stropp was a lifelong Westviewian I would suspect his ashes would mostly contain some carbon, traces of comic book printing ink and lots and lots of mozzarella cheese, none of which is especially good for your lawn.

Anyhow, the moral here is apparently that Bull is an inconsiderate moron who makes everyone’s jobs just a little more difficult via his special brand of dementia and idiocy. What a zany character, eh?


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

17 responses to “A Coach Stropp Saved Is A Coach Stropp Urned

  1. Lord love a duck. As busy as he is ramping up the stupid Atomic Comics caper, Batiuk just cannot leave alone the Buck ‘n’ Bull plotline. Football must be such a big deal in Westview that they line the football field in March, while in the rest of the scholastic athletic world baseball season’s about to get underway.

    • Epicus Doomus

      It’s definitely a rather haphazard time and place to be running Buck & Bull strips, especially twice right in the middle of a gigantic five week long mega arc that just finally got to the premise two days ago. You’d expect this crap in September or maybe around Super Bowl time but in mid-March? I can’t help but wonder why he felt these Sunday B&B strips just couldn’t wait, then again nothing he does makes any sense to me as I’m sort of a normal person.

    • Jimmy

      Many parts of the country have spring football practices and scrimmages.

      • Gerard Plourde

        You’re right that a number of states permit spring practice (e.g. Arizona). Ohio, however, isn’t one of them, only allowing practices to begin in the first week of August.

        Click to access ftregs.pdf

      • hitorque

        But I don’t think they run them on their own playing field instead of a practice field?

        • comicbookharriet

          They’re obviously lining the field for spring MARCHING BAND PRACTICES. Gotta have those hashmarks to keep the bass drum players from traversing right into the tubas!

  2. redsnifit

    That chunk of dirt is still sitting on his mantle months later.

    I somehow don’t recall them digging up what’s-his-name’s ashes this winter

    • Epicus Doomus

      After Bull’s retirement ceremony it was revealed that he had Stropp’s ashes stashed in the stinky old WHS locker room. After the game he went back on the field and oafishly fell on his fat face and spilled Stropp all over the place. That’s when the idiot broke the urn. I guess Stropp’s family didn’t care either way and honestly who could blame them?

  3. billytheskink

    Jack Stropp has no family, or no family that cares about him. That’s what I get out of this strip.

  4. spacemanspiff85

    Apparently Batiuk thinks this is somehow touching or poignant or something, which is just sad for a lot of reasons.
    It’s also continuing his theme of “athletes are morons and deserve to suffer”, which is infuriating.

  5. I know that the current image of Mopey Pete is probably him reacting to being told that calling the flagship character Starluck Smith isn’t going to protect him from being sued but it’s appropriate because of the whole being stupid, maudlin and implausible thing.

  6. Gerard Plourde

    This strip is another example of the complete fantasy nature of the Funkyverse. Ohio high school football practice isn’t permitted to start before August. Are we having another mini-visit to the future like the old, decrepit Crankshaft that was sprung on readers of that strip a couple of years ago or is this just another example of The Author’s indifference? In either case, given the passage of time, the hole created by Bull’s and Tank’s vandalism shouldn’t have such fresh edges. Also, why would this go undetected until the ground crew is lining the field? Mowing would precede that (although if it’s mid-March I doubt that anyone in Northern Ohio has thought it safe to switch over from the snowblower yet). And if mowing has occurred, then the Stropp-fertilized patch, even if it is hardier, wouldn’t be standing out like that. (yeah, I know, “It’s called ‘writing’”.)

  7. Smirks 'R Us

    Oh sure Batty, tempt us with a beautifully crafted story (albeit too brief) of the birth of Atomic Comics, only to smack us in the face with a Sunday strip recalling the poignant relationship between the coach and his star fullback who led them to loss after loss. Great storytelling and well done sir.


  8. Rusty

    He should have slabbed that hunk of turf.

  9. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Was there some kind of weird five month time jump? Batty showed it snowing every day from December 1st through the end of February. Sooooooo two weeks later, we’re in short sleeve shirts and shorts, lining a beautiful green football field??

    On the mantle is the ball of dirt Batty and his lawyers sued the old Stuck Funky website back to.

    The urn is cracked because CTE Bull (the angry, violent CTE, not the lovable, goofy CTE) used it upside Goatee Boy’s head after finding out Linda and Les had been “work spouses” for years.

  10. I guess this confirms that Tom Batiuk is aware that we are his only audience. Try to imagine a casual comics page reader coming across this episode–he’d have no idea what was going on.

  11. hitorque

    1. Why hasn’t that lump of dirt dried up and disintegrated yet? And why is the grass still green?

    2. How the hell did the playing field come out this nice, this level and this green after a harsh northern Ohio winter? That’s more puzzling than a missing clump of dirt…

    3. Who the hell lines the field in March? Yes I know someone mentioned spring football, but at least for me we played on a practice field and didn’t need the trouble of getting it officially lined. All you need are some goddamned cones and maybe some spray paint for spring practice…