Link to Today’s Comic.

See everyone! Funky fixed himself a cup of cocoa. You can now all stop complaining about Funkyverse females being subservient beverage providers. Because the fact that the women brought cocoa was the real issue here, and not the fact that lacking a Y-chromosome relegates you to a background fixture serving as a bland chorus of reacting to men.

I’m really really really tired of writing about Mort Winkerbean. Especially about Mort Winkerbean the ‘Alzheimer’s’ patient who now can magically talk, walk, reason, and remember past events. I had a grandma who had Alzheimer’s, and believe it or not, Mort stories 10 years ago captured a hint of the pathos involved with having relatives with dementia.

Which makes seeing Mort magically resurrected a huge f**k you to the audience he was earlier pandering to. If I could tell Tom Batiuk one thing, it is that it is infinitely more offensive to magically cure a ‘disabled’ person that you created to abuse for a ‘topical’ storyline designed to milk other people’s pain for your profit and praise, than it would be to just have them hit by a bus.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

15 responses to “#NotAllMen.

  1. spacemanspiff85

    So Funky was just sitting by himself in the kitchen? Where was his dad this whole time, that Funky was waiting to see when he was going to bed? Did he go out somewhere? Or were he and Holly’s mom sitting by themselves in the living room or something? This makes zero sense.

    • redsnifit

      He’s thinking lewd thoughts about what’s going on in Mort’s room. His lust for Mort and Mrs. Budd is so strong that he’s unable to even look at his wife and must cower in the kitchen alone.

  2. The Nelson Puppet

    It’s not too late! Batiuk is setting Mort up for the prestige “prostate cancer arc” in 2019.

  3. redsnifit

    Oh boy we get to see Mort lecture Funky on how he’s a grown man and can make his own decisions in an ironic yet familiar reversal of the standard parent-child dynamic.

  4. billytheskink

    I’ve read Act I Funky Winkerbean. I can say with confidence that Mort had no reason to wait up for Funky back then.

  5. Paul Jones

    What’s really offensive is ignoring the strip’s history in order to set up a stupid joke that makes Funky look bad.

  6. Rusty Shackleford

    Wait, that is Funky’s Dad, I thought Funky was talking to his ghost of Christmas future. (Spoiler: he gets Cancer)

  7. Rusty

    The day-to-day quality of the drawings must depend on how much or little Ayers gives a crap that day. I feel his pain.

  8. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    BatHack sez: “I didn’t want Morto to be demented anymore. I ran out of hilarious dementia stories for him. That IS curable, right? Well, he’s cured. I also didn’t want Cayla to be black anymore. I was getting heat from all my 70 year old Ohio readers. So I made her white. Or actually, she DECIDED to be white. That’s also a choice, I believe. And I’m tired of hearing about Cindy supposedly being the same age as Funky, Holly, Harry, and Les. Look — She’s 20 years old. Why would a young leading man in Hollywood be interested in a 60 year old, stoopid? If you don’t like it, write your own published, syndicated work. Gotta go. My mom brought me some cookies and hot cocoa. Those comic books won’t read themselves, you know. (smirk)”

  9. countoftowergrove

    Ninety-year-old decides to hit the after hours meat market. Now there’s an issue facing young people in a sensitive manner.

  10. Charles

    Hey, great, Funky! You were worried about how awkward this would be to bring it up with your father, and now your dumb ol’ dad has brought it up for you! You can now tell him that you don’t want him boning your mother-in-law and explain in gross detail exactly WHY.

    Seriously though, what is Batiuk claiming Funky is worried about here?

  11. Tom Batiuk, up in his attic, reading Flash comics, comes across a box of Funky Winkerbean fan mail.

    And everytime he comes across a fan mail that says “Funky is my favorite character,” he scowls, and snarls, and starts tearing that letter into tiny bits.

    His lips snarl. He scowls and says “Not anymore. Not in my world!”

    And he keeps tearing, more and more. His lips narrow.