Really, Linda

In the glacially paced Funkiverse, we’ve learned to appreciate anything that passes for actual plot advancement. Linda has decided to retire, and the first one with whom she shares this important news is, naturally, her work husband Les. I’m wondering what Bull’s “maxed out” CTE is going to look like. So far, it’s merely turned him into a passive, mildly dumber version of his already dumb self. He definitely has depression, and his grasp on reality isn’t helped by well-meaning friends who retcon his past failings into Hall of Fame accomplishments.

I just had to share a remixed FW strip that appeared a few years ago at the comics blog Snark It Up, Fuzzball, which depicts a much happier outcome for Bushka Family.

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17 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

17 responses to “Really, Linda

  1. Charles

    Boy, Les sure is looking bored and haggard. You’d think his hearing that his best friend at work is retiring would rouse him out of his stupor, but no, he instead reacts the same as he would if Linda were to tell him about what she had for dinner last night.

    Also, using Bull as a baseline, what’s Linda going to do in retirement? Close herself up in her bedroom and binge watch health videos or something?

  2. Epicus Doomus

    There are sadder-sacks in Westview for sure, but no character embodies sheer exhausted defeat quite like Linda does. Wry in a weary sort of way, sardonic, skeptical, beaten, demoralized, miserable and OK with that…that’s Linda’s whole character. Even characters like Funky and Becky are beams of sunlight compared to Linda. He should draw her like “Peanuts” used to draw Pig Pen, except with a little misery cloud following her everywhere she goes instead of dirt.

    • billytheskink

      Wait, that’s not a little misery cloud hovering around the top of her head? There’s no way that’s hair…

  3. billytheskink

    “Tell, don’t show”, the Batiukian creed. If Linda and Buck weren’t saying “CTE” every other strip you would never know that Bull was acting any different than the dim bulb that beat up Les in Act I and then beat him in tennis in Act II.

  4. comicbookharriet

    This is especially hard to stomach after Buck ranted on and on about how Bull was an inspiration for him in dealing with his CTE diagnosis. Apparently inspiring is becoming such a sad-sack shut-in that your wife has to retire early.

    • spacemanspiff85

      Look forward to the punchline at the end of the week where Linda jokes about wishing Bull had died before his diagnosis, like all the other people with CTE.

  5. Paul Jones

    Since this is Act III, it isn’t going to end how it would in the real world’ that’s because a murder-suicide would get in the way of smirking and whining about being helpless.

    • William Thompson

      But after they die, Bull and Linda could be stuffed and mounted, then displayed in the Westview Sporto Hall of Fame. The taxidermist could place smirks on their faces, and Creepy Les could whine that he never had the chance to cash in write “Bull’s Song.”

  6. Gerard Plourde

    So Les didn’t retire last year even though he spent the bilk of what would have been the school year touring to sell the Lisa Trilogy. Who knew?

  7. sgtsaunders

    This is an easily predictable result, given Battic’s demonstrated hatred of sports and the Funkyverse’s joie de; mort, Bull’s upcoming prolonged death as a raving lunatic will dovetail nicely with Les’ penchant for death porn. “Head Bashed In: Bull’s Story” cannot be far off.

  8. Don

    So, which is the more likely result:
    (a) Bull dies during the summer, and Linda “unretires” in time for next fall;
    (b) Linda is replaced by…er, just what is Linda’s job, anyway? My guess: Keisha, who will start at the same time Summer becomes the new AD

  9. Miskatonic Sophomore

    So few facial features, but so much dreariness! Between Linda’s defeated and half-closed eyes and the crude scribbles of Les’s douchebag goatee and smarmy little mouth, I’m feeling a little “maxed out” myself…on misery.

  10. bobanero

    So, Bull’s condition is apparently getting progressively worse. He was so debilitated that it looks like he wasn’t even able to deliver an acceptance speech at the Hall of Fame dinner. Now Linda is apparently looking to retire so she can stay home while Bull sits in the basement and watches old high school football games, occasionally screaming “SANDWICH”. So how long before Bull makes a miraculous recovery and spends his time discussing erectile dysfunction medication with Dinkle and Mort?

  11. ComicTrek

    If we’re headed toward a “Bull’s Story” type of thing, my patience is going to max out.