Did someone break the windows?

Link to today’s strip

No Les, for either one of them to be jokes, they would have to be funny. And kudos to all the commenters who wondered if Batiuk would remember far enough back to reference the machine gun. Turns out it was cardboard. What is funny is that bringing a fake gun to school these days is likely good enough to get you suspended. Ah, the good old days, when Batiuk still had the balls to use guns for humor.

There is something funny in this strip though. That kid carrying the ‘We’re Still Here” sign looks like an immigrant from another strip entirely. I’m guessing Archie. He’s either got freckles, acne, stubble, or a tiny tattoo of a flock of migrating geese on his cheek. That coat looks like he murdered Chewbacca to wear his pelt, and the orange scarf isn’t so much a fashion accessory as some terrible noose he’s broken free. He’s got a nose high and sharp enough to use as a can opener, pointy ears. And all of this with a receding hairline hiding under cowlick reminiscent of the infamous scene in “There’s Something About Mary.”

Forget everyone else in this strip. We should make it all about Cowlick from now on.

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20 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

20 responses to “Did someone break the windows?

  1. That is the most miserable crowd I’ve seen. I’m sure Batiuk told Ayers to go for “serious and determined” but, good lord, they all look like they would so rather be anywhere else.

    I guess that makes sense for any character unlucky enough to be assigned to this strip.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      They have had it with Batty’s gimmicks and ham fisted approach to current events.

    • Charles

      Les looks as if someone just served him a turd on a plate. Nate’s looking at Les as if to say “did you really order that?”

    • Jimmy

      Let’s be honest. It was either this, or cut school and head to Montoni’s. Which would you choose?

  2. Kinda reminds me of Ed Grimley from SCTV.

      • sgtsaunders

        Got to get up pretty early in the morning to scoop TFHackett. Ed Grimley was the first thing I thought of seeing that “kid”.

      • Charles

        This isn’t the first time we’ve seen this kid. He showed up earlier when Batiuk needed a third male student to go with Bernie and Lumpy. He had lighter brown hair but still was receding like crazy. Ayers adjusted the wrong thing with his hair.

        I’m still struck by how disinterested he looks. He’s slouched over, got his hand in his pocket and is holding the sign as if he’s saying “Someone gave me this to hold, so here I go. Whatever.”

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      When reached for comment, Batyecch said, “It’s one of those whacky hairstyles kids wear these days. I think I saw somebody who looked like this when I was creeping around the high school last week. *smirk*”

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Yes, it WAS a joke…the strip featured one of those pretty much every single day, in fact. Not machine guns, jokes. Sure, lots of them sucked but still, at least an effort was being made. As predicted, BatYak’s “topical take” could possibly be more nebulous and wishy-washy and who better to deliver a wishy-washy take than Nate, the wishy-washy “no nonsense” principal who dishes out the wizened platitudes with all the enthusiasm of a car wash attendant dishing out quarters for the vacuum.

    Classic BatHack, both wallowing in and disassociating himself from his early work at the same time. I guess Holly Budd wasn’t “really” immolating himself, Dinkle wasn’t “really” forcing the band to practice in monsoons and the school computer wasn’t “really” a sentient being. My childhood has been forever sullied and quite frankly I just don’t know WHAT to believe anymore.

  4. billytheskink

    I’ll bet Becky would love to be armed. No joke.

  5. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    Cardboard? My whole life is a lie!

  6. Paul Jones

    Typical Batiuk prestige arc. isn’t it? We have:

    1) Hollow virtue signalling.

    2) No consequences for the amazing stupid and sexist thing Bernie said.

    3) Morose children who would appear to welcome the mercs from TF2 as they would afford them the sweet release of Death.

    and

    4) Pissing all over continuity to make a leaden and wrong-headed point.

  7. spacemanspiff85

    This is one of the most unrealistic things I’ve seen in this strip. This crowd would absolutely not look so somber and shell-shocked, they’re skipping class. Also, none of them are on their phones.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Excellent point about the phones. They’d ALL be recording it.

    • Charles

      It is stunning. I also noticed how this little group comprises all the students that Batiuk has introduced this round, except Tank, because he can’t be shown doing something praiseworthy.

      You’ve got from left to right, Logan, Balding-Beyond-Belief Kid, Those Dumb Twins from Crankshaft, Bernie, Lumpy and Maris. That’s his entire cast from this current round of students.

      Also, how much do you want to bet that he later shows the “hot” Maris as the stuck-up beautiful girl who has lots of hangers-on but here, where it would be most appropriate, she doesn’t have a single friend with her.

      And one more thing, I *hate* the “Protect Our Kids” sign. That’s not a sign a kid came up with. That’s the sort of sign the virtue-signalling, praise-begging adult who wrote this would create.

  8. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Back to something really questionable about what Batyuck is doing here. When Princ’pal Nate heard about the children’s plan, approved by The Lord Of Language himself, he expressed his approval. At any point did Nate-o announce something like “I’ve heard a walkout is being planned. School policy forbids leaving the school grounds without authorization. Anyone violating this policy will be subject to disciplinary action.” Was there any of that? I’ve never worked in school administration before, but I’d guess that a principal better at least cover himself by stating the policy for all to hear. Then, if the policy is violated, it’s because the order was disobeyed.

    If he approves this obviously unlawful action, either explicitly or tacitly, and a kid gets hurt somehow, whose butt gets tossed in the deep fat fryer? Crossing the street, a kid gets hit by a car. A kid steps off a curb and breaks an ankle. I dunno. Use your imagination.

    True story — When I was in high school, the seniors celebrated “senior cut day.” Most of the senior class went to a nearby park. A kid got high on quaaludes and drowned. I don’t know what kind of legal or administrative consequences were handed down, but I know this: There was no senior cut day the following year.

    Here we see these two idiots standing by while a particularly serious rule is being broken. They look on approvingly as if something righteous, holy, and USEFUL is going on, seemingly unaware that if one hair on one kid’s head is harmed, their careers are likely over.

    This makes no sense in several levels.

    • Charles

      Plus, it’s not much of a protest if no one objects. Nate could have done the same thing, probably to greater long-term benefit, if he scheduled an assembly on this topic. And then have the students walk out on THAT to his chagrin.

  9. I don’t think anyone broke the windows, but TB sure broke the wind…