Tag Archives: Emily

by | March 10, 2019 · 12:59 am

The Right to Hug Arms

Link to today’s strip

The internet has been a wonderful breeding ground for all kinds of new dialectical terminology. Whereas before we had things like Ockham’s Razor or Pascal’s Wager. Now we’ve got Godwin’s Law, “As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1.” The Bechdel Test, “Whether a work features at least two women who talk to each other about something other than a man.” And Poe’s Law, “Without a clear indicator of the author’s intent, it is impossible to create a parody of extreme views so obviously exaggerated that it cannot be mistaken by some readers for a sincere expression of the parodied views.”

Here we have an inverse Poe’s Law. A sincere expression of a view so obviously exaggerated it is indistinguishable from parody.

Also. Is this all of the students who walked out? That must have been some editorial.

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by | March 8, 2019 · 11:40 pm

Did someone break the windows?

Link to today’s strip

No Les, for either one of them to be jokes, they would have to be funny. And kudos to all the commenters who wondered if Batiuk would remember far enough back to reference the machine gun. Turns out it was cardboard. What is funny is that bringing a fake gun to school these days is likely good enough to get you suspended. Ah, the good old days, when Batiuk still had the balls to use guns for humor.

There is something funny in this strip though. That kid carrying the ‘We’re Still Here” sign looks like an immigrant from another strip entirely. I’m guessing Archie. He’s either got freckles, acne, stubble, or a tiny tattoo of a flock of migrating geese on his cheek. That coat looks like he murdered Chewbacca to wear his pelt, and the orange scarf isn’t so much a fashion accessory as some terrible noose he’s broken free. He’s got a nose high and sharp enough to use as a can opener, pointy ears. And all of this with a receding hairline hiding under cowlick reminiscent of the infamous scene in “There’s Something About Mary.”

Forget everyone else in this strip. We should make it all about Cowlick from now on.

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by | January 21, 2018 · 12:36 am

Random

Today’s strip features the two dippy Crankshaft girls in a phone-related joke intended to show just how stupid the two of them are. It succeeds on that level, I guess. Otherwise, it’s totally unrelated to anything else in the strip. I guess it’s remarkable in one sense that it shows their father, but I don’t know enough about their appearances in Crankshaft to know whether he’s ever been shown in the past. I think their mom showed up at some point.

Have at it!

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by | May 21, 2017 · 10:30 pm

Quiz Bowel

It is comics like today’s strip that remind me how good I have it. I’m not taking high school English from Les Moore. I never had to take high school English from Les Moore. It is as if he is intentionally trying to be the opposite of the teacher that successful people so often cite as the inspiration that got them to make something of their life. What a miserable experience in every single way this strip is.

Les’ senior students did poorly on their quiz last Monday and now his freshman students have done poorly on theirs… I see a common denominator here. I bet these students would too if Westview High had a math teacher.

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by | July 9, 2016 · 10:30 pm

Orchestra’s Witnesses

Another school levy must have failed, because Lefty is now soliciting Westview residents during the summer in today’s strip. I guess that sweet band turkey revenue was just not enough to cover the cost of new feathery hats, Dinkles brand shoes, and those things that marching band members wear over their shoes.

The financial situation must be really dire in the Westview school district, because the band has weathered at least a dozen failed levies. It has typically been the high school’s sacred cow. Nate probably shouldn’t have allowed Les to meet with parents back in May, which undoubtedly cost the school district whatever bit of support it might have had.

It almost makes me wonder: How many guitar and flute tunes are there anyways? How many do Emily and Amelia know? Is Lefty going to pull out and in of every driveway in Westview? Is every single person who answers their door in Westview over the age of 75? Did Lefty come up with the punny name for this scheme before coming up with the scheme itself?

OK, I know the answer to that last one…

And with that, I yield the keyboard to a towering figure in the annals of SoSF, the one and only DavidO. As always, I appreciate you all putting up with me for a couple weeks.

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by | March 11, 2016 · 10:29 pm

Take Another Little Piece of My Pulitzer, Baby

Link to today’s strip.

At first I thought Les was admonishing Naughty in his office, in a private conference so as to steer her away from Chullo’s former crime (I seem to remember “It says Wikipedia right at the top.”  “So that’s what gave it away.”).

But then I note Nice sitting there, and I realize he’s actually berating her in front of the entire class.   Apparently being a dick is nothing compared to being Les Moore.  That’s quite a level of ass-hattery to deploy against a student who’s barely been in his class for a week.  I guess when Les has to smug his superiority (“I am familiar with all the Pulitzer-award winners…as well as several deserving nominees…”) woe betide those who happen to be in his view-finder.

Which is what makes the third panel so…delicious.  Naughty is full-on denying Les his ability to give a half-lidded-eye smirk!  She is being a dick right back, almost effortlessly!  And look how Les, denied his pun-portunity, takes it!  Look how he is practically boiling with rage, barely able to contain his fury at being de-punned.  If this strip was set 100 years in the future, his next line would be “Jetson!  YooooOOOOOOOOOOOuu’rre FIRED!!”  You might think the impact of panel three is lessened by not seeing his full squeeming visage, but I would offer instead that it allows us to imagine it.  And what I imagine is glorious.

I think I have a new favorite character in the Funkyverse.

 

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by | March 10, 2016 · 10:29 pm

Say The Secret Word

Link to today’s strip.

For once, the wordplay isn’t terrible, though I imagine it’s awkward as hell to say out loud.   But it doesn’t seem like a real problem here–if you can’t think of a rhyme for a word, choose a different word that says the same thing for which you can think of a rhyme.  Unless…unless Les has given them a list of words that they have to use in their work?   I can think of several he would choose–Lisa, cancer, smirk, no one can understand me, roses, December, endings, earned, and of course the word “pun” itself.  Lists the students are fantasizing about–dickhead, douchebag, punchable, smug….

What makes this an exceptional episode is panel two.  Aside from Nice, everyone looks stymied and miserable, even on the verge of panic as they craft poems destined to be punned over by Les.  Les himself–now there is a man just beginning to climb the hill of self-loathing, and that look on his face is awesome.  The dawn of self-awareness never looked so deserved.

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