Out of Commission

The overestimation of Pete and Durwood’s market value we saw yesterday continues in today’s strip, though now it is Durwood and Pete who are doing the overestimating.

$10 to draw Thatsnought Hewmore into a Sophomoric Sightings panel?! That’s piracy! Durwood draws a couple of unknown titles for a startup comics publisher and is exhibiting at a Free Comic Book Day event, nobody is there to spend money at all, much less on his limited artistic skills. Durwood should be glad-handing customers as much as possible in hopes that they’ll even consider thumbing through next month’s issue of The Inedible Pulp.

Pete’s offer is a bit better, partially because he’s charging less but mostly because he’s sitting next to Les. In contrast to Pete’s attempted $5 grift, Les is trying to unload copies of Lisa’s Story at (presumably) the suggested retail price of: HA! No.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

17 responses to “Out of Commission

  1. Epicus Doomus

    WHY IS DICK FACEY THERE??? It can’t be a serious work of literature AND a comic book, Tom. LES HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH COMIC BOOKS! Sorry about all the shouting but goddamn, man. I’m expecting some unfunny comic book-related drollery and there he is, inserted into the strip like this is some sort of hellish FW flea market or something. What the f*ck?

  2. billytheskink

    If you ask Les for a commission at one of these things, does he write down a short excerpt from Lisa’s Story or just give you the finger while wearing a heavy-lidded expression?

  3. Oh my God. The ego that Tom Batiuk has…must be the size of a planet.

    My understanding of “Free Comic Day” is that publishers produce issues of a comic specifically to be given away…it’s NOT “Walk in and anything you choose is free today.” That’s my understanding. It may well be wrong.

    The idea that Les is there, on “Free Comic Book Day,” is completely nauseating. The fact that this talent-less turd has dragged his backdrop with him, to hawk his illiterate wares to people hoping for a free bit of fun is sickening. Because you know he’s not giving away anything. He’s there to whore his books and I hope he sells nothing, but instead is besieged by readers who want their money back. And then they set him on fire.

    Because, let’s face it, Les Moore BURNING TO DEATH IN AGONY is the only thing anyone wants from this terrible comic strip.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      The jokes on Les, notice he can’t give Lisa’s Story away.

      • Buckeye Feculence

        Yeesh! How long ago was that book published? And yet he keeps propping it up like it’s a timeless masterpiece that will be in demand forever

        • timbuys

          “You know, I had always been meaning to pick up a copy of Lisa’s Legacy but never got around to it until I saw it mentioned in today’s paper. Off to the Kent State Press Bookstore and Remainder Outlet!”

  4. Gerard Plourde

    And why, if Darin and Pete don’t have signs identitying them, would one be needed to identify Les who has taught at Westview High for decades and as such has probably tormented every Westview resident between the ages of 14 and 45 or so.

  5. comicbookharriet

    How is all of this fitting in the store? Are they even in the store? Are they in a grey, foggy, purgatory dimension?

  6. The Nelson Puppet

    Tom Batiuk has a fetish for book signings. Jesuchristo, take the wheel!

  7. Paul Jones

    We have three depressing alternatives to consider.

    1) Batiuk has never actually gone to a free comics day in his life.

    2) Batiuk misinterpreted what was going on.

    3) Batiuk is showing the dumb people in the real world what they should be doing.

    Remember, this is the lard-head who threw his career away because he thinks that he’s letting people down by letting them laugh a little at their problems. He thinks that making them feel worse is doing them a good turn….which makes the incompetent simp bus garage manager on Crankshaft who’ll help you if it kills you his real alter ego.

  8. Yes, Batiuk please encourage artists to charge criminally low prices for their work…

    • timbuys

      At $5/page and figuring 200 words per page, that works out to two and a half cents per word. That sounds about the right price for Pete.

      [Insert joke about paying Batiuk/Pete not to write.]

  9. louder

    “Sure we take commissions! I can just ignore my exclusive contract and draw copyrighted characters for you. The bonus is once my employer finds out, you and your $10.00 will be my only source of income for me and my wife!”

    • comicbookharriet

      If my nerd conventions are anything to go by, most comic book artists are allowed to draw commissions for money.

  10. spacemanspiff85

    Les Moore sitting quietly by himself hoping someone notices him is my favorite thing to happen in this strip in a very long time.