That’s The Bit

Link To Today’s Strip

At first glance I was like “whoa, Wally’s cell phone vibration mode is so powerful it’s torn completely through his suit jacket!”, but then I quickly realized it was just crappy art. It’s nice to know that our beloved Buddy still exists, as he hasn’t been seen in a while, but as usual BatYap gives him absolutely nothing to do. Free Buddy!

So they decided to skip Montoni’s and go to that stinky old decrepit movie house instead? Or will they hit Montoni’s after? I think we all know the answer to that question. I wonder what they were going to see before Adeela ruined Date Night again?

“Honey? “Doctor Obvious Versus The Time Gargoyles” is playing at The Valentine tonight! It’s a sci-fi musical from 1947 starring Wallace Beery! Can we go? Can we? Huh?”

“(Sigh) I guess.”


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

31 responses to “That’s The Bit

  1. Captain Gladys Stoatpamphlet

    Wally hulking out of his jacket would have been dangerously interesting. Disaster averted.

  2. William Thompson

    I’m so disappointed that Batiuk doesn’t identify Wally’s RRRRRRRRRRRRingtone. But he was a soldier, so I’ll guess it’s either “RRRRRRRRRRRReveille” or “The Caissons Go RRRRRRRRolling Along.”

  3. William Thompson

    Where’s the leash? Shouldn’t Buddy have one to make sure Wally doesn’t get lost?

    • erdmann

      “The ADA requires that service animals be under the control of the handler at all times… The service animal must be harnessed, leashed, or tethered while in public places unless these devices interfere with the service animal’s work or the person’s disability prevents use of these devices.”
      So, Wally is in violation. Maybe he’s next to be rounded up.

      By the way, it took less than 2 minutes to find that using Grand-père Google, likely twice the time Batiuk spent on research for this entire year’s worth of strips. Where’s my award?

      • Jimmy

        I hate to be a beady-eyed nitpicker, but a dog off the leash can be part of a its work, especially with PTSD. The dog checks ahead for dangers and constantly circles around its handler.

        So, Batiuk is somewhat accurate in this instance.

        • erdmann

          Good point. And indeed, a dog helping someone with PTSD might very likely fall under the exceptions. Still, I wager we’ve given this more thought that Batiuk.

  4. J.J. O'Malley

    Wally’s ringtone? I figured either Elvis’s “RRRRRRR You Lonesome Tonight,” “RRRRRR You Gonna Go My Way” by Lenny Kravitz, or Jet’s “RRRRRR You Gonna Be My Girl.”

    As for what’s playing at the Valentine, how about a double feature of “Green Card” and Hitchcock’s “The Wrong Man”? I just hope Max is ready to clean the urine puddle that’s going to be left behind…and no, I’m not talking about Buddy.

  5. I bet they were struck by the situation they just left, and went to see “Licensed to Drive” with those Corey kids.

    Maybe we’ll get some good luck, and they’ll also be struck by a pickup truck hauling garbage!

    • William Thompson

      But isn’t that how this strip was created?

    • hitorque

      That movie was all right back in the day… I think I was 13 when I first saw it and it reinforced the notion in my mind that “For the love of GOD, do NOT fail your driving test!!” and I think I got like 29/30…

  6. Gerard Plourde

    And the glacial pacing continues. And if Adeela’s phone is inoperative what phone is she using that would identify her as the caller? If she’s calling from the detention center, caller ID would probably show the source telephone number (and possibly the city or town that the number is associated with), but it certainly can’t tell the cell phone the name of the individual who is calling.

  7. billytheskink

    I guess Adeela’s “bricked” phone is working again… or is Wally omniscient now?

    • The Merry Pookster

      Since Adeela’s phone is now working… and ICE can see she only has 3 numbers in her call history 1) Montoni’s 2) Wally 3) Kahn

  8. comicbookharriet

    Most phones emit a opaque white smoke when ringing. This is a perfectly normal thing to both see and not react to.

  9. Count of Tower Grove

    I asked for it, and we got back to date night.

    • hitorque

      What’s really pathetic is for all the spotlight he gets as the strip’s central character, how many years do we have to go back in the archives to find Les+Kayla’s last “date night”?

  10. Banana Jr. 6000

    So they cancelled the Montoni’s date, even though there were both already at Montoni’s, and Wally wasn’t even that late, nor was it much past 5 PM. They “rescheduled” the date, went home, changed into much nicer clothes, drove to another city, and went to a movie. Adeela called Wally from her bricked phone, which worries Wally even though he has no way of knowing she’s in trouble, while his service dog rematerialized.

  11. Banana Jr. 6000

    This is another strip could be greatly improved by changing one line. Wally should say “it’s from jail!” It matches his worried expression, Adeela’s phone being bricked, and why he would answer when Rachel doesn’t want him to.

  12. comicbookharriet

    What is really interesting is how Wally is able to get a signal in the nearly featureless grey-black void populated only by a ramshackle movie theatre. I assumed they had been transported to a purgatory-like dream dimension from a bad 80’s sitcom.

    Seriously, this is getting to 9 Chickweed Lane levels of background laziness.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      I know. I was thinking they were on the stage for Lisa’s Story and The Valentine was a prop. I expected them to break into a song. …lives a city, that the damned call home, hear their hellish rondelet .

  13. hitorque

    1. So the service dog magically re-appears after a month? Is this “date night” going to be a threesome or something?

    1a. And once again FUCK YOU, WALTER for dragging your poor beloved service dog (and the only redeemable character in the entire goddamned Funkyverse) to whatever Michael Bay-directed explosion-filled crapfest in 8D audio surround is playing tonight… Or better yet, let’s bring things full-circle and let them watch “Starsuxxx Jonese Part II”…

    2. So your long-awaited “date night” is a fuckin’ trip to the Valentine? Way to go, pimp… You really know how to make your woman feel special, and Mrs. Firebush should be touched that dear hubby is spending the king’s ransom of $20 whole American dollars on her tonight. Oh and because it’s the Funkyverse there’s no chance in HELL that Carrot Juice got to choose some cheesy romantic chick-flick either — They’re watching Avengers vs Transformers vs Aliens vs Predators vs Terminators or whatever childhood fantasy Wally wants to indulge. That should really get her engine revved up for that requisite 10-minute post-date coital romp (while the dog watches, naturally)…

    3. So Adeela’s FIRST fucking phone call isn’t to a family member, it isn’t to a fellow Iraqi refugee, it isn’t to her attorney, it isn’t to the Iraqi embassy, it isn’t to the State Department, it isn’t to USCIS, and it isn’t to ABC News… It’s to WALTER FUCKING WINKERBEAN(!) What the hell is he supposed to do exactly?

    4. Just your daily reminder that this shit has been going on for God knows how many weeks and we STILL haven’t seen “Manager” Wally Winkerbean do even thirty seconds of actual work — Unless “making subordinates cover your shift and Adeela’s shift while he teaches her to drive” counts as work… I mean damn, as slack as the work environment is at Atomikkk Comixxx, even those idiots do a little genuine work from time to time…

    • William Thompson

      It’s interesting that Buddy the Magic PTSD Dog finally re-appears when Wally has a date with his wife. That’s some marriage you got there, Winkerspud.

    • Banana Jr. 6000

      Avengers vs Transformers vs Aliens vs Predators vs Terminators

      I would totally watch that. Unless I could watch a violent, R-rated Smurfs vs Croods vs Trolls vs Alvin and The Chipmunks vs Minions instead.

      • hitorque

        Now that I think about it; my joke of an idea doesn’t seem all that worse than what’s usually playing in the theatres and 2020 *is* the year of craziness…

        Needs more X-Men, though…

      • comicbookharriet

        I heartily second. I want both of these crossovers right away.

  14. hitorque

    5. Adeela: “Help me Meestair Volley! I have been captured by the POLICE ICE!!”

    Walter: “Is this some kind of silly foreigner-turned-new-American prank? Everyone knows the police are a local/state jurisdiction while the ICE are federal! Now I’m headed to the movies because Firebush likes it when I tickle the torch under her skirt while we’re surrounded by a crowd of strangers in a dark theater! Don’t wait up!” **END CALL**

    Special Agent Sergeant-Captain Konstantinos: “And that was your one phone call!! Come along, Miss Samir Salah al-Aziz Osman Naswal Belhadjali Elchoufani Chang da Silva Mohammed Vettel Dondeti Favre Olatunde Babayale Khabibulin Paul Korea! We’ve got to ‘expatriate’ you back to your nation of origin and by that, we mean ‘Send you skydiving without a parachute 12,000 feet above the Canadian side of Lake Huron!’ You’re Trudeau’s problem now!!

  15. Perfect Tommy

    This isn’t the way to the detention center!
    Naw, we have to swing by Crankshaft’s place to send a fax.