Tag Archives: cell phones

Dead Punch Line

Today’s strip is EDT. Extremely Dead Today.

Lame? Oh yeh, but I figured it wouldn’t look half bad following this. I know Pete’s the writer and Durwood’s the artist, but sheesh Durwood, do you have to make it that obvious? Guy probably wouldn’t even be working so late if he wasn’t such a chronic procrastinator, so no sympathy from me.

And with that, I pass the keyboard over to SpacemanSpiff85, who reminds us of the best of comics in name as we dissect the worst of comics in FW.

Advertisements

23 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Something With You

Link to today’s strip.

I can’t process Dullard’s sentence in panel two.   It’s really awkward, and sounds like “Is it…your shoes?  Is it a bug that landed on your…shoulder?  Is it a bum sitting next to you?  Is it your iPhone?  IS IT YOUR MINECRAFT ACCOUNT?!?”

I assume he means “Are you in the emergency room because you are experiencing an emergency?” or shorter,  “Is it you?”  But, “Is it you?” would leave an awful lot of white space for a word balloon drawn a year ago, and I have to guess that this would be one thing that Tom Batiuk would feel embarrassment over.

Honestly, though, he really should feel embarrassment over the last panel.   Dullard flies into a frenzy over learning that his child is in the emergency room– this is a natural reaction that any parent would have.

But any natural parent would have checked in on his offspring sometime in the last few months.  A good parent would do this daily, at the very, very least.  Instead of sweating over the cover art for the latest issue of The Inedible Pulp.

What I’m saying is that Dullard should slash his wrists and bleed to death…not so he can save his child, but so that the next Rip Tide – Scuba Cop can have realistic blood in the water.

13 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Smirky Smirkybean

It is only at today’s strip where I finally realize the true meaning of Free Comic Book Day. I get it now. It’s not a day where free comic books are given out. No, it’s a rallying cry. A desperate plea. Comic Book Day must be freed from the clutches of these unbearable shmucks! Free Comic Book Day! And Free Holtron while we’re at it!

Also, Logan Church is here now. Such a sad turn for the once-accomplished business blogger. You could drive a semi-truck through her earrings.

14 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Aunt Alta Vista

Here’s the link to today’s strip. I have only a single comment:

Stop it with “Grandpa Google”! It is not a thing anyone in real life has ever said or ever will say!

15 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Uh-O-Hio

Thankfully, today’s strip see’s the end of Funky and Holly’s ridiculous and pointless road trip. Unfortunately, panel 3 seems to be foreshadowing a fate worse than Montoni’s pizza for dinner… alumni band practice, no doubt involving Lefty and Dinkle. This relatively innocuous strip is, unfortunately, a likely calm before the storm.

Sometimes with this strip, you think there can be nowhere to go but up. That is NEVER the case, though. Never allow yourself to think that this strip cannot get worse. It has too deep bench of characters and recurring settings that you fear seeing to ever expect improvement, the immortal Dinkle and his non-retirement being chief among them.

25 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Videocracy

Link To Today’s Thing

Yet another cutting and timely observation about This Darned Technology Today, courtesy of the BanMan, who’s never more than five or ten years behind these “modern trends”. What a lifeless, listless outing. What’s next, a gag about unreliable GPS directions? Or that annoying warning sound your car makes when the seat belt isn’t buckled?

I assume that’s Morty driving in Funky’s sepia-toned flashback, for what it’s worth. This joke is so generic it’s almost impossible to think of anything to say about it aside from the usual generic snark. It sucks, it’s boring, it’s stupid and etc. Thus far this car trip to Florida is every bit as tedious as we all assumed it’d be. Where the hell is Cell Phone Girl when we really need her?

15 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Slackerday, June 30

Today’s strip was not available preview, because Comics Kingdom’s strip uploading person has been taking cues from Pete and Durwood and put their duties off until the very last minute.

These two have been procrastinating for decades now. Here’s a scene from back in high school where Durwood has shirked his duties at the school paper in order to have kissy time time with Jessica. Pete, Sophomoric Sightings‘ alleged writer (and now artist) tries to lollygag by claiming he forgot how to write until Chien lights a fire under his rear end.

Funky Winkerbean-2006.09

Chester ought to look into hiring Chien. I’ll bet there would be fewer offsite coffeshop breaks if he did.

8 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky