Si Habla Lespanol?

Link To Today’s Strip

Only two languages? How incredibly humiliating for poor, poor Dick Facey. It’s all just another burden Les has to bear, the price he’s being forced to pay for bearing his innermost soul and so forth. Now I’m not a big-shot professional author, so I can’t say for sure, but it seems to me that getting your book translated and published in Spanish would be a pretty big and possibly even lucrative deal. But, as we know, the bearded dick with ears cares not about wealth or fame or notoriety or success, as demonstrated by the obnoxious way he tilts his stupid beard in panel three as Marianne futilely attempts to placate and pander to him. What a dick.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

38 responses to “Si Habla Lespanol?

  1. billytheskink

    I’m waiting for Lisa’s Story to be released in Esperanto. I know some Spanish, so I need a copy in a language I can’t read at all.

    • Banana Jr. 6000

      Post kiam kemioterapio komenciĝos, ĉi tiu ludejo estos fermita por riparoj.

    • Here’s an extract from the upcoming Spanish edition:

      Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ligula ullamcorper malesuada proin libero nunc. Lectus magna fringilla urna porttitor rhoncus dolor purus non enim. Pretium fusce id velit ut tortor pretium viverra suspendisse potenti. Feugiat in fermentum posuere urna nec tincidunt. Scelerisque felis imperdiet proin fermentum leo vel orci. Lectus quam id leo in. Vestibulum sed arcu non odio euismod lacinia. Magnis dis parturient montes nascetur ridiculus mus. Volutpat maecenas volutpat blandit aliquam etiam. Ante in nibh mauris cursus mattis. Quam quisque id diam vel quam elementum. Ipsum nunc aliquet bibendum enim facilisis gravida neque convallis a.

      Augue interdum velit euismod in pellentesque massa. Commodo odio aenean sed adipiscing diam. Quam quisque id diam vel quam elementum pulvinar etiam. In egestas erat imperdiet sed euismod nisi porta. Ultrices mi tempus imperdiet nulla malesuada. Neque convallis a cras semper auctor neque. Fames ac turpis egestas maecenas pharetra. Sed turpis tincidunt id aliquet risus feugiat in. Purus gravida quis blandit turpis cursus in. Scelerisque felis imperdiet proin fermentum.

      • Hitorque

        I remember the first time I saw lorem ipsum text in grad school, and I got all frustrated trying to translate it with my three years of high school Latin plus two semesters in college… I just couldn’t understand why it kept coming out as jibberish.

  2. Professor Fate

    Used to work on publishing and dear lord by now as big a book as Lisa’s Story is supposed to be it would have at least Spanish, French, German and Italian versions along with rights being sold to the UK and British Commonwealth – never mind Japan and China and an audio book- it would seem we can now add book publishing to things Batuik does not understand.

    • Epicus Doomus

      For years the people of Spain suffered in silence, forced to learn English in order to properly appreciate the Greatest Story Ever Told. But not anymore! “El Otro Zapato” indeed.

  3. J.J. O'Malley

    Frankly, I’m a little disappointed that panel two doesn’t feature Lester holding up English- and Spanish-language versions of Dead St. Lisa’s hagiography while sharing the good news with us, his humble followers. Dear Lord, how much more of this can Battyuk pack into an arc without his graphic avatar’s head swelling so much that it bursts the panel borders?

    By the by, would “Menos Mas” be the correct Spanish translation of our brave cancer-surviving hero’s name?

    • be ware of eve hill

      I’m all for Les’s head bursting à la the movie Scanners.

      My bilingual Spanish-speaking neighbors have a name for our brave cancer-surviving “hero”.
      It’s ‘Shit Head’.

  4. Given the number of times Batiuk has touted Lisa’s Story, I’m surprised we didn’t get an entire month or two showing how the Spanish language version was created.

    –oh crap, she said “Going to be.” So we still might get that month or two.

    • Banana Jr. 6000

      It won’t take that long. Les is going to promise Cayla he’s taking her to Spain, and that’ll be the end of it.

      • erdmann

        I’ve never been to Spain, but I kind of like the music.

      • Hitorque

        Typical Les timing… Messi has left Barca and Generalissimo Franco is still dead…

      • be ware of eve hill

        Hey, why didn’t she kick his sorry ass to the curb after that cancelled Hong Kong trip – which was only envisioned in the first place because that’s where Lisa’s Story was going to be printed? All the women Batty creates are passive doormats. I’m somewhat convinced the real reason that Les is so obsessed with Lisa isn’t ‘twu wuv’, but actually thwarted rage. Lisa got sick and died before he had the chance to leave her first.

        I’d like to see Cayla get her revenge by inflicting serious damage to Les’s credit cards shopping for more clothes on Rodeo Drive.
        Cayla: Hi sweetie, our Mastercard is maxed out. I hope you don’t mind that I opened a few new department store credit cards. We saved ten percent!

        Unfortunately, Les would most likely retort with…
        Less: St. Lisa never needs new clothes. Why can’t you be more like her? 👩🏽🤬


    • be ware of eve hill

      Lisa’s death has been beaten so much, it’s thread bare.

    • Anonymous Sparrow

      There was a Spanish language version of “Dracula” created at the same time as the 1931 English film. Is the world ready for a “Spanish Lisa’s Story” movie?

      I once saw a Woody Allen movie dubbed into French, and the actor who dubbed Allen sounded like Allen would sound in French. The actress who dubbed Mia Farrow, on the other hand, sounded nothing like Farrow.

      Whenever I read Crockett Johnson’s *Barnaby,* I hear W.C. Fields as Mr. O’Malley; however, I can’t hear a voice for Lisa. (Maybe I need to look at the Komix Korner trial sequence and see whether it suggests anything.)

      in “The First Wives Club,” Goldie Hawn’s character says that there are three ages for a woman in Hollywood; babe, district attorney and driving Miss Daisy.

      None of these ages with their voices seem to apply to the former Lisa Crawford. Then again, Biodad Frankie would say that Lisa was never a babe, in court she defended rather than prosecuted and at the end Les pushed her in a wheelchair rather than drove her in a car.

  5. William Thompson

    “Wow, Les, how much are you getting for this Spanish-language edition?”

    “They’re sending me five free copies of the Spanish-language edition.”

    “But what about the money?”

    “Uh . . . . my agent forgot to ask for foreign-language royalties in the contract, so, uh, at least those five copies aren’t coming postage due.”

  6. Banana Jr. 6000

    Apparently this is based on a real-world development. The real Lisa’s Story book trilogy got a publishing deal in Spain. The Battyblog says:

    I learned recently that a Spanish publisher has purchased the rights to the Lisa’s Legacy Trilogy and will begin publishing the books in Spain starting next year (2020).

    I’m guessing the publisher is “Norma Editorial” or “Grup 62”, who produce localized versions of a lot of American graphic novels.

    Which is great for Tom Batiuk, but Les is supposed to be much more prolific than that. As Professor Fate says, a book of this one’s supposed importance would be getting a lot more internationalization than this. This plot development doesn’t fit the story at all! As with a lot of Les moments we’ve seen lately, his successes are so small that they come off as sarcastic.

    • William Thompson

      So Les is using the strip to shill his (real-world, actually-exists merch? Well, it’s an improvement over using the strip to shill his comic-book proposals. (Which is the only explanation I can imagine for his for the way he tosses out those new Atomik Komix titles.)

      • Banana Jr. 6000

        I don’t think Batiuk is trying to shill the real-life Lisa merch (well, no more than usual). But I have no idea what his aim actually is. Considering how big the Lisa’s Story book is supposed to be, the book being published in Spain (which is only a tiny part of the Hispanic-speaking world), is a laughably minor development.

        I know it’s Les’ job to look down his nose and sniff at any praise or recognition he gets. But this is such small potatoes that I kind of get him sniffing at it. It’s like he’s being sarcastic to Marianne. “Yeah, it’s in two languages now. Big whoop.” Then she fails to detect this in panel 3, and Les sniffs at her too, because Les must be superior to everything and everyone at all times.

    • Jimmy

      This explains the odd choice of Spain for the first Spanish-language publication when the majority of the Spanish-speaking world is in the Western Hemisphere. The upside is the folks of Latin America have so far been spared this dreck.

    • be ware of eve hill

      Thoughts and prayers for the people of Spain.

  7. erdmann

    Poor Marianne. Here she is, just trying to be nice and that filthy pig Les is totally removing all her hair with his eyes.
    Hey! Her eyes are down there, you perv!

  8. Hitorque

    Why are Masone and Marianne pretending they give a rat’s ass about the continued commercial success of a 15 year old book? Wait, an even better question is why are they even still speaking to him?? They’re actors and their minds should already be on their next respective movie projects… In fact I don’t even know why any cast or crew would humor or patronize Les at this point… The movie is DONE. This little creative partnership is now OVER. Les doesn’t have any creative bullets left in his gun — How many years have passed since the self-proclaimed “Lord of Language” even *thought* about writing something, anything? So kill the faux VIP treatment, please… Check him out of that five star hotel, throw his luggage on the sidewalk and call him an Uber to cart his ass and Cayla’s to the train station so the can take Amtrak back to Suburban Cleveland.

    The ultimate irony is all this endless talk about “Lisa’s Story” in book and movie form hasn’t told me a single goddamn thing about Lisa herself. It just searches continually for different ways to tell me what an awesomely humble great guy Lester Moore is, and losing his wife was sadder than Kennedy’s funeral since none of us normals know what it’s like to lose someone or something dear to our hearts…

    • Rusty Shackleford

      The irony is that this is Batty’s Story. He considers it his masterpiece, but nobody else cares. He really is out of ideas. When his strip was light and humorous, he did a great job and created several memorable characters.

      But now, all he can do is kill people off or find another excuse to talk about Lisa’s Story. The syndicate really should have fired or replaced him.

      Watterson realized he was running out of ideas and he took a bow and walked off the stage gracefully so he could pursue his other interests.

      I’ve wondered why Batty hasn’t done the same and gone off and wrote his own comic books. He doesn’t need to work so why not focus on something you love? The answer is that he doesn’t have what it takes to create them..

      What he really wants is recognition from others and so he clings to his strips with all he has. As long as he is in a newspaper he is a somebody, without his strips, he fades into oblivion.

      • Banana Jr. 6000

        It’s bad enough that Batiuk won’t stop hyping Lisa’s Story. But he keeps hyping it in the exact same way! “I know! I’ll have Les push Lisa’s wheelchair by their special park bench, while they repeat the same dialog!” It didn’t work the first 20 times, why does he think it’s going to work now?

        There’s something really immature about it. It’s like a small child who keeps repeating the same question, thinking this will eventually change the answer. “Can Lisa be a cultural icon?” “Can Lisa be a cultural icon?” “Can Lisa be a cultural icon?” “Can Lisa be a cultural icon?” “Can Lisa be a cultural icon?” No. Stop asking.

        And when the universe doesn’t react exactly how Tom Batiuk wants, he pouts, and 11 months later Les starts bloviating about his artistic purity, and how his work is too sophisticated for all the dumdums he’s forced to tolerate. Tom needs to read the room, and stop blaming his lack of sales on everybody but himself. Sometimes perfectly good material just doesn’t land. And Lisa’s Story is not perfectly good material.

        • Anonymous Sparrow

          Isn’t one definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results?

  9. Owl #6

    So we’ve declared war on Spain again?

  10. The Dreamer

    So is Les going to bed the starstruck Marianne? Cayla’s not going to stay with Les now that she’s seen Les’s reaction to the movie and knows he’s still in love with Lisa. He might as well go for it with Marianne

  11. Rusty Shackleford

    Meh, every strip on Comics Kingdom is published in Spanish.

  12. Jimmy

    This has to be the third or fourth consecutive strip showing Les with a drink in his hand. I am hoping, against hope, that we get to see a blotto Les by the end of the week, stumbling around and crashing into the buffet table before passing out on that damned park bench and being given the bum’s rush out of there.

    The airplane in the header is Les getting put on the first flight back to Cleveland after being told to never show his face in Hollywood again.

  13. The Duck of Death

    It’s hilarious the way Batiuk phrases it: “Around the World” = in two countries.

    As Rusty Shackleford points out, many (though not all) of the strips on Comics Kingdom have Spanish versions. Some examples: The Lockhorns; Rex Morgan, MD; Hagar the Horrible; Popeye; Hi and Lois, etc. It’s not that big an honor, Bats.

  14. be ware of eve hill

    Around the world in two languages? Uh huh. I’m sure a billion Chinese people will be breaking down the doors for a Spanish version of Lisa’s Story. Right.

  15. Is there supposed to be a joke here? All I see is Marianne painfully trying to engage Less in conversation.