She’s Having a Tired Plot Device

‘Ello! 4th-trumpet and Westview Waterboy DavidO is checking in, giving much-needed relief to Beckoning Chasm after BC’s two week run of excellent Funky snarking.

On to the funnies!

Hoo-boy. Put on your Members Only Jacket and throw on your Michael Jackson album because we’re about to retread over one of the tiredest troupes in situation comedy, the “Oh God, I’m having a baby, let’s duck into the nearest malfunctioning elevator that has a Rabbi, a mime and a 300lb guy who easily faints in it.” routine that was required in every sitcom, by congressional mandate, from 1983-1994.

Today’s strip throws logic out the window in favor of comedy, though I still don’t see how a panicked trip to the hospital where you gnaw your fingertips raw with anxiety constitutes comedy.

This sort of strip is great at illustrating why cell phones are the bane of screenwriters everywhere. In the age of instant connection, Jess could have just texted Durwood to come pick her up; she’s really feeling it and it’s almost time. The suitcase would already be in the car in that scenario; no need for a pregnant woman to go hauling it around.

I can’t peek ahead, so there’s no way of knowing if this arc is going to go on for weeks or if the Sainted Grandbaby will be enrolled in Westview High this time next month. Either way, prepare for every single worn out fumbling-dad-goes-to-the-hospital schtick ever seen in the last three centuries.

The Blind Sided

MKay: I’m not all that into sports – is there a position in football in which a trench-coated player stands smoking in one spot, occasionally pausing to hurl a football a great distance? Because this guy would be GREAT at that!

Apparently Coach sees the same thing in Jarod in Today’s strip!

Team-work, strategy, nimble-ness, speed, stamina, co-ordination, not to mention grades be damned, this boy can throw a football!

Considering Coach goes around “rehabbing” people with shredded ACLs with no medical training whatsoever, this almost makes sense.

Still, like MKay, I don’t know a lot about sports, but doesn’t Westview already have a quarterback? It’s such a played out plot that I think we’re just one step away from a goal-kicking mule.

Gross Anatomy

Whoa!

I know things get a bit rushed sometimes, what, with everyone’s busy schedule but what in the heck is going on with the human form in today’s strip?!

P1. Coach is literally as wide as he is tall. Jarod looks like he swallowed an ironing board while Wedgeman… whoa, dude, is your head even attached!?

P2. Wedgeman suddenly has the body of an 80 year old man while Coach’s legs deflate like two leaking innertubes as Jarod devolves even further…

P3. It’s the Geico Caveman!

Posey

Could Be A Movie Deal Here

Anyone waiting for some sort of Bautikian demise for Coach better stop holding their breath; no, from the look of today’s strip we’ve got at least a few months of “Unlikable loser no one likes teaches coach a few things about football, and, in turn, learns a lot about life.” strips coming down the pike. Now, if Jerod is supposed to be the new coach’s assistant or new quarterback I couldn’t tell you, but prepare to wallow in 80s high school movie troupes that’ll culminate with Jerod being crowned the Westview Homecoming King.

Not bad for a 30 year old who still hangs out at school!