Son of Stuck Funky – Page 366 – Son of Stuck Funky

No, It Isn’t

It is not, in fact, interesting in the slightest. Which I guess is par for the course with this strip.

“You know, in the old days, we used to talk about what we’d accomplished with our students. The routines we designed, the cough awards we won, the general feeling of accomplishment. Nowadays, though, I thought I’d skip all that and just talk about myself, non-stop. Did you know that I used to be deaf, but now I just need a hearing aid? Let me tell you all about that.”

No wonder Mr. Movie Director Man’s Dad looks so downcast in that last panel. Oh, God, what’s a polite way to get out of having to listen to this boring old fart? Maybe I should forget the ‘polite’ bit and just belt him in the mouth. Yeah, just smash his teeth in and hope his jaw breaks. Imagine Dinkle being unable to use his mouth! That would be so awesome! Oh crap, he saw me smile at that image and thinks he’s on a roll…maybe I can vomit up those hot dogs I had for breakfast, make my excuses…

It’s A Lot Like A Comic Strip But Without The Jokes

Link to today’s strip.

I was kind of hoping (as I’m sure most of you were) that Sunday’s Dinkle was a one-off, but all hopes come to Funky Winkerbean to die. I’d be happy to have a week of John and Harry talking about an event that they’ve never been to, but when the chance to shovel in Dinkle rears its ugly head, Batiuk jumps in with both feet.

I hate characters like Les and Darrin, but it’s Dinkle that really pushes the loathing lever to FULL. Both Les and Darrin are obnoxious, untalented dullards who whine when the universe rewards them richly, but neither one is treated like a sage wise oracle the way Dinkle is. And he is utterly undeserving of such worship, but he’s based on a beloved teacher of Batiuk so he gets lionized.

Gah. I say Gah again, sir.

Watch Out, The World’s Behind You

Link to today’s strip.

As always, Sunday’s strips are a mystery unavailable beforehand. But like a cold, damp Montoni’s pizza where you can taste nothing but grease, they’re a mystery whose solution is never fun.

I assume we’re going to get more of Wally’s graduation party, with perhaps a bit of sermonizing on the plight of the immigrant. The problem, as always, is that Batiuk refuses to do the minimal research necessary to get the facts right, so all his arguments end up being just flat out wrong.

You’d think his desperate attempts to appear Significant would make him refine his methods so he doesn’t come off as Willfully Ignorant. But I guess chasing awards doesn’t leave much time for anything other than Flash comics.

Break a Wish

Link to today’s strip.

Not much to say about this one…it’s okay, but the fact that Rachel’s wish was for Wally to become a night manager at a pizza place–well. It’s hard to think of anything sadder. Although I’m sure Batiuk regards that as a challenge and will get right to work on that.

I have to say, that’s the most unappetizing pizza I’ve ever seen. It looks cold and damp. This might be a testament to Chuck Ayers’ drawing skills, but I think he’s going in the wrong direction.

Charles made an interesting observation in yesterday’s comments, to wit: “H-1B visas are temporary work permits for foreigners who have specialty skills. Washing dishes at or assistant managing a pizza place is not one of those skills. Adeela’s literally taking a job a local American could do.’

That got me to thinking…why was Adeela here in the first place? I have to assume that H-1B visas are given to foreigners whose skills are pre-existing. In other words, they’ve already been trained in a specialty that few Americans have.

Adeela, though, was going to school here in the US to acquire her architecture degree…in other words, she was given an H-1B based on a skill she did not already possess.

Could it possibly work that way? “Oh, here’s a Muslim woman who wants an H-1B visa. What? She doesn’t have a specialty skill? Oh, well, I’m sure she’ll go to college here and get one. Next!”

Batiuk should really stick to things he knows about, or at least learn to use Google.

Let’s Make Adeela!

Link to today’s strip.

Well, those of you who said that Adeela will end up working at Montoni’s–please go to the ticket booth to collect your winnings!

I’m rather surprised that Wally, only a few minutes into his new position, felt that he could go over Funky’s head and hire someone to work–and on someone else’s shift, too. That’s pretty damn bold, and not in his character at all. I kind of thought he’d be all cringey and cowardly, and he’d meekly ask for another favor before presenting Adeela as a possible hire.

I think Batiuk thought we’d all be surprised by this development, but it was honestly pretty inevitable. The only thing he could do with Adeela was either send her back to Miseristan or make her part of the regular cast. And I’m sure he thought that if he kept her around, those awards would start rolling in. I guess she’s not quite as punchable as the worst characters here, but she doesn’t really bring anything to the strip (other than making Batiuk’s thirst for awards even more obvious). She’s just a distaff Wally, a sack of misery pushed here and there by forces she’s decided she cannot fight.

I guess Funky’s dialogue proves that Rachel is quitting–I’m not sure what a “day person” is, but it probably wasn’t Wally. Wally was a dishwasher (and I’m sure that will still be his primary role), and “day person” sounds like someone who actually runs the place…which sounds an awful lot like like Funky, come to think.

Well, there’s no way that Adeela is going to replace Funky, because as a female, she’s incapable of so many things in Westview. But, whatever her role in the restaurant, I’m sure that architecture degree will come in super handy.