Wish I could kick both of them, in the head, repeatedly. “I’m fat, I’m slow, I’m aging terribly, I’m dying”…yeah yeah yeah, Funky, we know. Give it a rest already. Every time these two tools jog together it’s the same old story. And look at Les today, with his look of condescending faux-“concern” for his obese pal…what a dick.
Category: Son of Stuck Funky
Fat, Sweaty and Whiny Is No Way To Go Through Life
Hmmm, in light of yesterday’s strip, is Les talking about Funky participating in the annual Cancer Fun Run or is he questioning whether Funky will have to urinate during the event (not an invalid question given his obviously very poor condition, I might add)? Wouldn’t surprise (or entertain) me either way, I suppose. Totally generic “Les and Funky jog” strip here: Les being annoying (that headband makes him even more unbearable), Funky bitching (although those miniature ankles of his gotta be hurting), gazebo, bench, Lisa’s tragic death, sweat beads…it touches all the bases even as it strikes out looking. Generic as it gets. Have a happy 4th of July, all!
One In The Bush
At first I thought this was another variation on “Les & Funky are slow”, until I realized what was really going on here. Lo and behold, a pee-pee gag. First one since “Fred’s fake yelp of pain when toilet seat falls” gag from the stroke arc, as far as I can recall. Mild chuckle worthy! Les doesn’t have any dialog! (Although I could have done without the disdainful look in panel two. What a dick.) This is rare, enjoy the silence!
Every Breaths You Take
“I can sort of pace myself by counting each breath as I run”. There Batom, was that so damned hard? If I didn’t speak fluent Batomese that first sentence would have confused the hell out of me. The Medina Mangler strikes again.
And here’s an alternate sentence to replace whatever the hell Les is jabbering about in panel two: “Mtlplx foplo sghrklit ba nono Carl Lewis blah trsphliy”. It makes just as much sense, it’s just as relevant and it’s definitely just as funny. I have to assume Batom was getting all worked up about the 2012 Olympics around that time, thus the completely random Usain Bolt comment. More like Insane Dolt if you ask me.
My overwhelming hatred for Les is really beginning to boil and we’re only two days into this thing. Funky must still owe him money because there’s no rational explanation for why he’s not bouncing Les’ head off the sidewalk in panel three. What a dick.
Killer Of Joy
Nope, it’s not TFH, not yet. Your old buddy Epicus is back for another week of snark and Batiukian torture! Our reward for riding out the ponderous and highly annoying Frankie Mega Arc? You guessed it: brutal, anachronistic Les Moore wordplay! I miss Frankie already. An entire week of these two nitwits jogging around exchanging awful jokes and terrible puns might just shove me right over the edge. Come back, TFH, all is forgiven!
“Killjoy was here”? Took me a few seconds but I eventually realized he was referencing “Kilroy was here”, which, in case you’re unaware, was a pre-internet “meme” from the WWII era. Which means that the target audience for that gag lies comfortably within the “over 75” age bracket. Sigh. Too bad Funky didn’t drink the beer, it might have made this interesting. But then again, probably not.
Son of Stuck Funky 