Son of Stuck Funky

Link to today’s strip.

As the comic books say, “What th–?”

“On the nose” means “with great precision.”  In other words, this comic has characters saying “I thought your talk was very precise,” and the other responding, “No, it was very scattered and vague.”  So, Dinkle is saying he’s a talentless loser who wastes everyone’s time.  Given yesterday’s strip, I can certainly agree with that!  C’mon, Becky, you should pop that old coot with your patented left hook!  Oh wait.

Now, if, in an alternate reality, “on the nose” meant “barely touching something,” then yes, that describes his clinic perfectly.  And thus the comic makes a tiny bit of sense, with Dinkle responding, “No, I was more thorough than that.”  But that makes Becky’s remark kind of insulting–and we certainly can’t have that if Dinkle is involved.  But not to worry, “on the nose” doesn’t mean that, so no one is dissing Dinkle!  Cancel the panic!

If a person is really determined to base his comic strip around word-play, then he needs to get that aspect done correctly.  One cannot just take a phrase like “on the nose” and think, What other body parts can I use to make a pun? and just settle on the first thing that pops to mind.  Making a good pun–and there are such beasts, from time to time–requires thought.

So, if Becky said Dinkle’s chat was “on the nose” he could say, “too bad, I was aiming for the brain,” then that could work as word-play.   Admittedly, it took me half a minute to come up with that, and maybe Tom Batiuk just doesn’t have that kind of time available.

A while ago I suggested that we get together and buy Tom Batiuk a dictionary.  I’m thinking now some kind of book on puns would be useful, too–maybe this one?

And here’s Wednesday’s Crankshaft!  I’m telling you, that writing job is practically mine.

Link to today’s strip.  (link corrected)

Greetings, folks, BChasm back in the slammer.  Thanks to Epicus for a typically stellar hosting job; now you guys get to have the B team!

As Epicus noted yesterday, Dinkle is my least favorite Funky Winkerbean character.  While Les is technically worse, with him, he will occasionally cough up some “writing” and one can see that his talent is as elusive as Funky’s wrecking bar whenever Les comes to visit.  He can at least have the word “pathetic” spat at him; he provides all the evidence that makes the word apt.

Dinkle on the other hand is treated like a minor god in the Funkyverse.   His every idiotic utterance is greeted as if it’s divine wisdom.  And, unlike Les, he is never brought down to earth.  Remember when the school computer was going to be a prop in Starbuck Jones, and Les started to bloviate, and Jim Kibblesnbits just shut him down with a “TMI”?  That sort of thing should happen to Dinkle all the time, and yet it never does.

In today’s episode, for example, Becky ought to reply, “Wow, where did that boring little nugget come from?  Does that rotten old hollow excuse for a brain just fire out this random garbage?  I don’t even see a bus around here, so there’s not even a context you’re reacting to.  How about shutting up some?”

But no, I’m sure a fourth panel would show her laughing uproariously. Because Dinkle.

I’m also sure the bus driver in the original “anecdote” would have answered something different, like “Strauss, huh?  Well, how about that.  Why don’t you sit in your seat and be quiet?”

Speaking of Strauss…I know some of the folks here played in the band in high school.  Did any of your bands ever play Strauss, or any other waltzes for that matter?  I can’t remember.  My recollection is that the band tended to play marches and rah-rah-rah music at sporting events, but, like Tom Batiuk, my high school days are long behind me.  Unlike him, I’m perfectly happy to keep them there.

PS:  I think I’ll apply for a job writing Crankshaft.  Here’s a sample of my work!