Cock and Bull

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I guess all the bird-themed dialogue is telling us that Chullo and Glasses are bird-brains.  Got it.  Although Glasses’ riposte makes no sense whatsoever. Is this his version of “Whatever”?  Because he looks more anxious than dismissive.

Also, since Glasses is wearing a Marvel-themed t-shirt, and Tom Batiuk has gone out of his way to tell us he’s a DC guy, I think that means he’s supposed to be evil.  Or maybe it’s more payback to Stan Lee for writing the forward for the new Funky Winkerbean collection.  Those boots won’t lick themselves!

The only interesting thing here is that kid’s hair in panel two.  Is she wearing a hat, or a plastic bag, or has she dyed part of her hair blue, or what?  Does she have a chullo?  Wedgeman could probably tell us, but since he was a senior last year, he has gone into the abyss…or at least, he should have.  What do you want to bet that he shows up anyway, because continuity is for losers.

Senior Moment

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Oh, good, it’s Chullo and Glasses, back for an arc.   Actually, it’s not good, but it could be worse.  It could be Les.

And Glasses, no, you’re not a senior until you start senior year.  That’s how it works.   Here’s an example you’ll understand.  If you want to go from your house to Montoni’s, you’re not AT Montoni’s as soon as you leave your house.  You’ve still got all those steps to take.

No wonder it took Chullo and Glasses 14 years to get to senior year.  They’re dumber than rocks.

The French Revolution

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This actually isn’t bad, although it’s a bit stretched for a Sunday episode.  Credit where it’s due–Tom Batiuk has finally realized what an obnoxious a-hole Les is, so instead of having him deliver these puns, he has Cayla do it, where they are far less smirk-coated and can be appreciated (as much as puns can be, that is).   If the roles had been reversed, this would have been one of the worst strips ever.  The punchable smirk in the penultimate panel would have been woven throughout like a plague bacillus.

Mr. Batiuk even has Les accepting Cayla’s puns, instead of whineley squawking that all the attention isn’t on him.   He actually looks proud of her.  That’s progress of a sort.  Maybe Cayla will actually start to come into her own as a character.  (Doubtful, but who knows?)

The one puzzling aspect is Cayla’s expressions; she looks like she’s at a funeral.  Especially odd is her look in that penultimate panel.  But I think I’ve figured that one out.  Cayla is beginning to understand what it is to be Les Moore, spouting endless puns for approval, and it smells pretty bad to her.

In short, good one, Mr. Batiuk–thank you.

Don’t misunderstand–this is like finding a raisin in a bowl of rabbit turds.  You didn’t want a raisin anyway, and you’ve lost your appetite, but at least it is edible–unlike the rest of what’s in the bowl.

Almost Like Being Punched Out

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Ladies and gentlemen, I present the dumbest comic strip ever printed.  Proof positive, as if any more were needed, that Tom Batiuk intends to do nothing except spin his wheels until the 50th anniversary.

Other than Pete’s paper-mache head-on-a-stick, I’ve never seen such a crass, blatant display of nothingness.  In fact, it leaves me speechless.  Lucky you!  See you Sunday!

Punchcraft

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Well, this raises a few questions.  What “disruption” is Darin talking about?  When Jessica says they’ll “catch up” with him, does that mean a later flight?  Or is she not going to California with him?  Is she aware that Funky is preparing to rent the apartment out from under her?  Not that her situation merits a single thought from anyone, since she’s a female–and we all know how important they are in this strip.  Still, it would have been nice to see some of this “disruption” rather than that damned wentletrap Les waving his operculum around the last couple of days.  I guess we get the fun of guessing what the “disruption” was.

  1. Lost Skyler’s Batman-themed diapers.
  2. Frankie showed up again, asked for a “cup a coffee.”  None could be found.
  3. Someone’s father was murdered.

What do you want to bet we’ll never know?

I dunno about the rest of you, but I find Darin such an unbelievably boring character–who at the same time, manages to be insufferable–that it’s hard to find anything to say about him.  To the best of my (admittedly not very extensive) knowledge, he has accomplished nothing of note in the strip.  Yeah, there’s the Pizza App, but that has had zero impact, other than as the butt of several jokes.   He’s like a gangly, angular construct of ambulatory meat.

At least the other characters have interests, even if those interests are nothing more than comic books.   At least that’s something.  Darin seems to exist in a shell where he’s nothing more than the sacred essence of Lisa.  I guess, in the viewpoint of some, that’s all you need to be to be considered worthy of attention–you’re somehow under Lisa’s shadow.