Unexploded Ordinance

This post. This whole arc. Wally’s return. It’s been a struggle for me to attack. For a very long time I couldn’t really figure out why. On paper, there’s a lot to work with. Maybe too much, maybe that was part of the problem.

At first I wondered if it was because I was, once again, taking this marathon half-year of a deep dive away from John Howard. Should I save some of this stuff for a potential Wally retrospective in the future? But with the literally hundreds of stupid minutiae that the Funkyverse waves around in my face, begging me to snark and dissect, would I ever get back around to it? After all, I’ve got green pitchers and Jinx Bushka waiting for me! This is a John dive, yeah. But you can’t talk about DSH without talking about Lefty, and you can’t talk about Lefty without talking about Wally. And you can’t talk about Wally without talking about…this.

Hey, Wally, did you know that Becky is married now? I wonder how you’ll react when you learn that! Boy I can’t wait to see that gut wrenching moment.
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Post Modern

‘Dan Davis’ as Andy Warhol.

I’ve been thoroughly enjoying all of you commenting on the shambling abomination that is Crankenstein’s Monster. It’s horror beyond imagination in the funny papers these days as Batiuk once again drags Lisa’s battered and abused corpse out to puppet around and demands Davis stitch it onto the recycled art patchwork of long dead gags that makes up modern day Crankshaft. Lisa Moore’s been more abused post mortem than poor Elmer McCurdy.

But at least when Les Moore does his dramatic dance of interpretive grief all over her grave, we know that Lisa is well and truly dead.

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Rock Bottom Remainders

And the winner of the Crankshaft punchline contest is….

Duck of Death with “God damn that bitch! I ordered stones!”

Ducky! Please come up to accept your prize! I know it’s half-assed and terrible looking. But so is Crankshaft these days.

(I was going for Yamcha and ended up with crouching Gollum, but you work with what you got.)
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